Suicidal thoughts panic attack

[Overcoming]

Last night I was watching a movie with my husband when I suddenly started feeling this terrible fear that I was going to lose control of my mind and commit suicide. I am not actually suicidal and it isn't what I want. It was this awful feeling that I was going to do it and had no control to stop it. At some point it occurred to me that I might be having a panic attack. Had any else experienced this? It's scares me so bad.

 

[ILoveLife]

Happens to me, on a fairly often basis. Anti anxiety PRN med usually helps.

T says I'm just scared of it, that I won't actually do it. That the suicidal part of us just wants to end the pain, and the part of us that doesn't want to die is scared of losing control. That calming myself down, even with meds, means I need to remember why I love myself and what's around me.

It's a common anxiety symptom to feel we're going to lose control or go crazy all of a sudden.

Hope this helps somewhat, I know it's a terrible feeling and so overwhelming.

 

[Overcoming]

@Sietz it was terrifying. It crossed my mind to head to an emergency room, but I couldn't handle the thought of the bill later. It was like I was sure I'd black out and cut too deep or grab our gun and pull the trigger.

 

[ILoveLife]

I think if you don't put yourself in situations of major stress, it's just a fear. It's a valid irrational fear.