The Beast Vs. Me

[thomas.robinson.54966]

This will be a running log of this cage fight no holds bar metal chair hitting fight of me against the beast. Feel free to join in. I feel like Rocky and clubbers Lang right now in the press interview. Right now the monster is sleeping but I know it's not long until the ring of the bell. Ding ding[emoji38]

 

[Deleted member 43454]

 

[anthony]

I here ya... it's taken me a lot of years to get the anger under control, and I have it under control for the most part, but you nailed it still... I still feel it there, sleeping... ready to make an entrance if ever provoked enough. Sometimes I actually wish someone would provoke me enough to unleash the beast just so I can get out what I can feel in storage, so the tank empties and I can get on again for more years.

So good to talk about it though... as I know anger is such an issue with combat vets. I guess once we get trained, then go to war, its hard to turn it off... :cautious: and its a sneaky little f*cker too. :sneaky: Creeps up without warning at times. :whistle:

 

[atilla]

I've gotten better with the anger control, and talking about it and other subjects on here has had a direct effect on it. One thing however that totally pissed me off and makes the Beast try to bust his chain, are stupid drivers on the road. My side of the road, following me too close, passing me in a no passing zone when I'm going the speed limit. Ocasionally drivers going to slow in an area I would consider a prime ambush site. That kind of stuff can make my blood boil.. just stupid people in general. I've gotten better with it. Sneaky beast indeed Anthony.

 

[dutchiedelta]

Anger.... We were taught to feel our anger and channel it.
Use it at the right time.
Now if we use it, we get locked up.
They didn't install the on/off switch.

Anger took me for a ride and forgot the directions back home.
Depression is anger turned inwards. I find that safer for my children.
The serpent anger still crawls around inside of me.

 

[Deleted member 43454]

I've gotten better with the anger control, and talking about it and other subjects on here has had a direct effect on it. One thing however that totally pissed me off and makes the Beast try to bust his chain, are stupid drivers on the road. My side of the road, following me too close, passing me in a no passing zone when I'm going the speed limit. Ocasionally drivers going to slow in an area I would consider a prime ambush site. That kind of stuff can make my blood boil.. just stupid people in general. I've gotten better with it. Sneaky beast indeed Anthony.

Hell yea, My biggest pet peeve is people not using turning signals on the highway. Like it's that f*cking difficult to flip the damn switch... I needa know if your f*cking turning because I'm doing 85 and your doing 65. Even if I'm only passing with out speeding, lost count of how many car's merged into my lane dangerously close. Just traffic in general man I will snap at who ever is in the passenger seat if they keep giving me wrong directions. Probably a big reason I stay out in the country.

 

[Grizzly]

Driving has always been a major issue for me too. Giant triggers. Much of what you just explained atilla. I drive so much that you would think I would become used to it. But I'm not. Last week, an incoming car goes LOC on me I swerved and avoided the 100th accident that week. But I had to pull over and take 30 minutes just to regain my shit. I was a wreck.

One of these days I'm gonna stop swerving.

 

[dutchiedelta]

One of these days I'm gonna stop swerving.

No you bloody well don't stop swerving and avoiding.

 

[Deleted member 43454]

You guy's ever feel like you do have a heightened sense of awareness? That shit come's in handy!
I lost count of how many deer's at night, car accidents, shit I've avoided with quick reaction time.

 

[atilla]

You guy's ever feel like you do have a heightened sense of awareness? That shit come's in handy!
I lost count of how many deer's at night, car accidents, shit I've avoided with quick reaction time.

Hell yeah, Brother. I came around a curve once and there were 5 deer in the road. I was driving a mini-van, but I was able to do a little fish tailing and just bumped a couple of them in the arse. No damage to the vehicle but took me a couple of days to recover. As far as a heightened sense of awareness, yep. My wife and I got stranded while mudding in BFE, and had to lead her and several others 5 miles through the woods with no flash light. I could see fine. My wife wanted to know why I stopped every couple hundred yards. Lol, listening halt.

 

[Grizzly]

Haha...yeah. The heightened sense came in handy today as a matter of fact. A school bus tried to take me out. He had the stop sign, I the ROW. I knew he wasn't paying attention. Could tell by his facial expression. Anyway I yielded.

 

[atilla]

It's a heightened sense that most people are going to do stupid things.