Therapist Clueless About Sociopaths

[Jane.l]

I think @ghotiff makes a good point - I am pretty sure my ex is narcissistic but i guess it's subjective . However because it interested me I have looked into narcissism and I have done some research and I now understand more about it and how and why it effected me - I was just thinking it might be a useful thing for you to do for yourself knowledge is power.

 

[desiderata310]

*steps out of the dialog*

Thanks folks but I can't actually be a part of this thread anymore. I'm getting pretty...anxious? triggered? Having trouble thinking at any rate.

 

[radicalgratitude]

Because there are no more doubts about the situation, no more "but what if I had done ...."s . He would have still been a monster with no capability of feeling remorse or empathy whatsoever. It makes the trauma easier to process. Does that make any sense?

Thanks Snowwhite, it it helpful for me to read that!

 

[anthony]

We are the minority, I know that. As you said, maybe most psychopaths aren't violent etc, causing people trauma.

Even those that are violent, in relation to statements being made about them doing it because they enjoy it, is false and misleading based on foundations of psychopathy. It is a minority within those who offend who do so because they enjoy it. It is incorrect to believe they do it for enjoyment as though there is control established to that justification. Psychopathy is a personality disorder, there is little control in it for the majority... but there are a minority who explicitly enjoy their actions, but the majority do not when they offend based on psychology of the mental disorder.

People read something and brush stroke it broadly, when often not the case. If you want to broadly look at psychopathy, then the majority who offend cannot even define why they do / did the things they did. Many can't feel empathy, compassion or even comprehend such complex emotions, let alone understand between right and wrong. Feelings are to the side when not being mentally capable of understanding right or wrong, and when taught other ways to distinguish, the majority understand their behaviour as being wrong and don't want to do the things they do.

My point is that people need to stop tossing in a minorities behaviour as though it applies to the majority of the group. There is no argument that a majority of this group offend traumatically, but it is only a minority who do so willingly and get an absolute kick out of it, with zero remorse, even after learning how to distinguish. Psychologists understand this from their own learnings, just as I understand it from reading texts on psychopathy as a personality disorder, and not focusing on niches within the disorder as though they apply to all involved.

Talking about wall street sociopathy... these are non-violent types, and yes, they often don't have the conscious to understand their actions and how the flow-on effect of gambling with others money affects those concerned. But then similar books cite overlap with a confusion of labelling such people with sociopathy when there is no personality disorder formed in childhood and adolescence, instead they mimic egocentric behaviours similar to personality disorders, yet don't have that underlying youth cause and effect for diagnosis.

Is it a personality disorder? Or is it ego, pride and as simple as a gambling fixation that draws them to stockbroking?

 

[Lolly]

*steps out of the dialog*

Thanks folks but I can't actually be a part of this thread anymore. I'm getting pretty...anxious? triggered? Having trouble thinking at any rate.

I'm going to join you, feeling the exact same. I think I'm going to crawl under the chat fridge where I belong, lol.

 

[radicalgratitude]

I'm stepping out as well for the same reasons as @Lolly and @desiderata310. I hope that you have found the answer you were looking for @Dana1010

 

[darrenS]

i disagree on a couple of points ...sure a soldier may kill , but at some level you have a chance , take a child soldier for instance, they are usually devoid of emotion simply because they are kids and thrust into a traumatic experience , they then as kids learn what they have to do to survive. I have worked on a few occassions with people that could be termed as sociopathic , most were not dangerous but could not take responsibilty for any action, however when one also includes violence , their response is entirely different from that of a rational person, and yes trauma is trauma, but having experienced violence from a true sociopath , i can only say there is no way to stop them , with anything - and yes i have experienced repeated traumas with a variety of people and that cold stare is something that haunts you like nothing else

 

[aka]

Does anyone else think trauma induced by sociopaths/psychopaths is unique and distinct from other types of trauma, at least in the details of how it occurred?

My first thought is no, but then I am confused by what you mean by the "detail of how it occurred"

My therapist looked flustered, and said, "Why is it so important for you to describe him as a sociopath?" Um, because he was one?

I can understand why your therapist is not being supported of your terminology since neither you nor the therapist can say for certain that the person is indeed a sociopath. The person may have sociopath like behaviors but that does not mean he or she is one. I don't mean to say the person is not bad and has not hurt you I just saying that only a professional can diagnosis someone as being a sociopath.

Most psychopaths aren't rapists or murderers, and most of them will never go to jail (although this person did operate on the shady side of the law).

From what little I understand of psychopaths this is correct most are not violent.

@Dana1010 I think @anthony has made some excellent points and you might want to consider rereading what he said because I found his posts to be very knowledgeable. I wish you the best and hope to have been some help. ;)

 

[anthony]

I think I'm going to crawl under the chat fridge where I belong

You don't belong under a chat fridge Lolly... healthy discussion is mind stimulating IMO. I come away from these discussions with things I often haven't thought about, forgotten, and simply more food for thought. We aren't arguing in a negative context here... well, I'm not, and I don't think anyone else is either based on reading their replies. Healthy debate is lovely...

 

[Friday]

Does anyone else think trauma induced by sociopaths/psychopaths is unique and distinct from other types of trauma, at least in the details of how it occurred?

Nope. In fact, depending on which aspects you're talking about, there's a great deal of similarity between dealing with psychopathy I or II and certain other types of trauma. Whether you're talking about losing the illusion of control (car accidents, natural disasters), or being manipulated (DV, bullying, etc.), or being controlled (childhood trauma, captivity), or someone enjoying inflicting pain (sadism, bullying), etc. Again, it depends on which aspects bother you the most where the parallels lie.

Do you think if your trauma was caused by a psychopath, that's a crucial piece of the puzzle and needs to be integrated in therapy?

No more so than if you're hypersensitive to your abuser being OCD, or ADHD, or a redhead or whatever. If someone is more upset about how unorganized their abuser was? Or their appearance, or, or, or. To me, that's the interesting part. That's where answers lie. The way in which we are responding. And why.

 

[Dana1010]

when taught other ways to distinguish, the majority understand their behaviour as being wrong and don't want to do the things they do.

They understand it cognitively as wrong; they never understand it emotionally, and that's why they keep doing it. In English, they know it's wrong, they just don't give a sh*t.

 

[anthony]

Dana... I'm sorry, but you're only looking at your specific case, and you're broad brushing everyone in that category with your experience, and not with actual facts.