Thinking the worse

[Melody Lindsay]

With my recovery I am at the stage that I recognise that I think the worse of every situation. Examples could be that, someone doesn't answer their phone I think they hate me don't want nothing to do with me, my kids aren't home right on time I start to stress that they been kidnap.

Is anyone else going through this at the moment and recognising it?

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Hi it sounds like your catastrophising. CBT skills can help with that. I've dealt with similar symptoms myself.

 

[Britt.f7]

I do that from time to time and have to talk myself through the reality of it. Just the other day my sister seemed kind of moody and I took it to mean she was angry with me(for what, I don't know). My head was spinning. But I asked her if she was okay and she said yes, so I had to take her at face value.

Sometimes, when my son is late coming home from something, I worry that something tragic has happened. I try not to, but it isn't easy. I want to grab him and hug and kiss him when he does show up, but I refrain. He's 17, almost 18.

 

[Annie B]

Yup, that's my biggest problem right now. Mine has more to do with the fact that I feel like if there's a chance I (or my family) could die, even a remote one, I will. Chances mean nothing to me. It happened to somebody right? I have no idea how to handle this other than to stay busy to avoid thinking about it. Enjoy the time we have with our loved ones as much as we can. Not much help but at least you know you're not alone.

 

[arfie]

I am at the stage of recognizing I have done it all my life, even -maybe especially- when I thought I was Miss People-pleasing Sunshine. It is amazing the ease with which humans can say one thing while doing the opposite.

Congratulations on the awareness. It was -and still is- an all-important step in my own recovery.

 

[RussH]

With my recovery I am at the stage that I recognise that I think the worse of every situation.

Melody, I completely understand how you feel. I really struggle with this as well. I find myself thinking things like "they only associate with me because the have to." Or "they didn't invite me because of an oversight, they didn't invite me because they didn't want me around."
So I understand how you feel, so you are not alone in this. We, you and I, will get through this, and help one another along the way.

 

[GingerAli]

I completely relate to what you all are saying. I feel like I have been this way all my life. But in reality one of my abusers used to tell me no one liked me, etc. I also get paranoid I'm going to mess things up at work all the time. All these things make me on edge constantly. My T told me it's the "hypervigilance" aspect of PTSD.
Unfortunately CBT hasn't completely helped with this issue for me. But I have a lots of memories still hidden so it very well may be something's missing for me

 

[franciemarnie]

For me, I didn't grow up with a clear sense of reality because my dad was an alcoholic. My perception of reality was denied daily for years when I was a kid. No one spoke honestly except re: trivial things. I had to guess why people did what they did. I couldn't ask questions. The alcohol made my dad act abusively and irrationally and like he was nuts. I questioned myself all the time. I came to believe I was inherently offensive. I learned never to ask people why they did the things they did for years. I imagined the worst.

As time went by as an adult, I slowly learned to check out reality against what I suspected. That helped a lot because I always imagined the worst and unless I was dealing with an irrational person, I was pleasantly surprised and relieved to know that they weren't reacting to me but to what was going in in their lives, kind of like how I reacted to the world.

 

[RussH]

I also get paranoid I'm going to mess things up at work all the time. All these things make me on edge constantly. My T told me it's the "hypervigilance" aspect of PTSD

I agree completely. I am always afraid of failing for the same reason.

 

[Tinyflame]

I really agree with franciemarnie's post #8. Also, when things have happened before it seems 'possible' they will or could again. Perhaps it's 'psyching-up' to deal with that possible reality?, or hypervigilance as others have said. It's almost unconscious for me, I don't realize until after-the-fact. Except perhaps as regards thinking of myself as burdensome, a self-rejection thing.