To many emotions

[Kaylove498]

I've been emotionless for a couple months now and have dealt with dpdr.

I've been pushing myself more lately working out going places hanging out just doing whatever to pull through the dissociation.

Today I woke up after a nightmare and started working out to help ease my anxiety and I felt more relaxed after. Even though I still felt dissociated. I decided to work out again tonight and once again I felt relaxed but something felt off.


I became more dissociated which I still don't understand but I've also started feeling everything at once emotionally.

I finally cried about my brother in law's passing and I started crying about something that happened shortly after his passing.

I'm concerned because I've been numb for so long is it okay that I'm starting to cry again?

 

[Ronin]

Yes.

As a short response. ;)

Do you have anyone who can help you with how overwhelming feelings get? I know you have a therapist, so wondering of their availability, and also thinking of social supports like friends, colleagues, the like?

 

[Kaylove498]

Yeah I have my spouse and family.
I meet with my therapist every week.

I couldn't believe I was actually crying last night. I've cried but I haven't felt the emotion behind it until last night. I could actually feel how sad I was if that makes sense.

I really hope I get better soon I'm trying hard to live my normal life. They said that's the only way to pull out of the dpdr.

 

[Whirlwind]

I'm concerned because I've been numb for so long is it okay that I'm starting to cry again?

I could actually feel how sad I was if that makes sense.

I was distanced from my emotions for a long time. I learned not to cry as a child and the next time I cried I think I was...38?

It was a weird thing to me....I started when I would go for a run and I'd start hiccuping and then I would bawl for no known reason! Crazy, I would have to walk it off it was so intense. It was really important, later feeling(s) matched up with events and connections were made. I had to learn not to fight letting myself cry or feel sad etc.

Richard Grannon has free youtube and often discusses "emotional literacy" .. maybe it would be helpful. I found it beneficial.

Best,

Whirlwind

 

[Survivor3]

Hi I find it incredibly difficult to cry. But I think it's really good that you are doing that. It's an important part of the grieving process and means that you are on the path to healing. Hope things improve for you and keep talking to your therapist about what's happening. All the best S3.