Very Awkward Flight

[Casey_03]

In one month I will be flying back home. In total, I'll be on planes and in airports for about 24 hours total. I'm excited about the trip but also quite horrified ... because I'm going to have to pump breast milk every couple hours all throughout the trip, and the idea of pumping in public places really freaks me out. Enough so that the anxiety is causing me serious insomnia and I'm unable to sleep even when the baby gives me a chance to.

Breastfeeding in public doesn't freak me out so much, but using a very loud pump that will inevitably attract attention does. (I have to pump because my baby is very bad at breastfeeding properly and the only way to get him to eat the right way is to bottlefeed).

I called the airline and explained that I will need to do this throughout the flight, and therefore it would be better to seat me in a discreet area. They said they have a special section in the first row for mothers, which is nice. But they also warned that there are three seats in the row and if the flight is booked there will be a stranger sitting next to me and my sister. They advised me to check with the stranger about whether or not the pumping will bother him/her during the flight. Which seems weird.

So, not only will there be some stranger sitting next to me while I am completely exposed, but I will have to check with this person about it first. And the crew members will also be walking back and forth and seeing me pump. Yes, I can try to cover myself with a blanket most of the time, but realistically there will still be times where I will be exposed and my boobs will just be hanging out. The sound of the pump is also bound to make people look at me to figure out what I'm doing. I don't know why, but this really really freaks me out. It's one thing to be breastfeeding a baby, but quite another to be putting a strange contraption up to your boobs. Usually people think nothing of it when they see a mother breastfeeding a baby, but I suspect people will be openly staring and trying to figure out what I'm doing with the pump.

I know I can technically stop breastfeeding for the trip and then try to get my milk supply back later, but it took me three months to even get to the point where I'm producing a decent amount, and I don't want to risk going back to the point where I'm barely producing anything.

I also thought about pumping in the bathrooms, but it would be incredibly unsanitary for the baby.

It's also really aggravating to try and discuss this dilemma with my sister, because she doesn't think it's a big deal at all and invalidates all my concerns.

Am I overreacting here? I've breastfed in semi-public places before and in front of people and it was fine. But the pump ....

 

[Silver.]

I do think you are worrying more than you should be as there are a lot of "ifs".
People that fly are used to all sorts of things, children, handicapped, therapy pets etc. You can put your sister between you and a stranger (if that seat gets filled), so it gives you more of a buffer. Try to get the window seat so that way you are farthest away from the aisle.
You can always leave the main portion of the pump in a bag so to help dull the noise of it. Add a receiving blanket into the bag to help cushion the vibration as well.
As I said, people are used to all sorts of noises, I think you will be more worried about it than anyone around you x

 

[PointlessExistence]

In one month I will be flying back home. In total, I'll be on planes and in airports for about 24 hour...

I don't think you're overreacting. I can understand how you'd feel (even though I'm male). It sounds like you really want to do the right thing, and although you know it's right, other people's possible views makes you feel conspicuous. I don't have any real advice, other than to give you a pat on the back and tell you that you sound like a really good mother. He's in good hands!

I hope you don't stop pumping. Don't lose the progress you've made; it's so important to your baby. And please don't compromise by doing the bathroom thing. Know that there are people in your corner who applaud you for doing what's best for your child.

 

[digger]

Could you get a hand pump instead and practice using it in advance. I know they're not as effective, but it might be enough to cover you for parts of the journey at least.

 

[Casey_03]

@Silver. Thanks, I hope you're right. I just hate being looked at and getting any sort of attention. Especially when it's my boobs getting the attention. @PointlessExistence You actually made me feel a bit better about this! Thank you so much for your kind words - it means a lot. @digger I have had terrible luck with those hand pumps. I don't know if it's just me, but I tried using a few different models and they had no effect whatsoever, none. I just ended up using my barehands and massaging the milk out. Ugh. Breastfeeding is such a pain.

 

[Silver.]

I remember when I had mini, how it was expected we would go to the bathroom "in shame" to feed her, to change her etc.
(and now a days, having to drape your baby under a blanket because it offends people? Pish...why don't they try eating under a blanket?)

I am hoping that if you can get a good enough seat, your boobs won't be out in the wind for onlookers, I totally get not wanting to feel a spectacle for something that is absolutely necessary.
You mentioned you are making more milk now. Is it enough to pump a little here and there to freeze for the trip? (I remember you saying it wasn't enough to store a while back, I did not know if that situation has changed now).

 

[Casey_03]

@Silver. Yeah, I think it's great to see there's a movement now to see more freedom in breastfeeding in public, and I totally support that. Which is why I think it's kind of strange that this is causing me so much anxiety ... But really, I don't care if I'm offending people too much, I just don't want them looking at me while I do my business. It takes me an hour to do each pump, so I'll be pumping for a significant portion of the flight. I hope you're right and no one pays me much mind. I do make a lot more milk now and could freeze some ahead of time, but I'd still have to pump - I can't go more than 3-4 hours without pumping or production will drastically reduce and I'll be in a lot of pain. And they have a 100 ml limit for the milk, which is only enough for half a feeding. I just hope the crew members end up being really nice and accommodating. Fingers crossed.

 

[Silver.]

I was just looking into breast milk rules for flying...
(3. 4 oz's is just ludicrous!!)
this site was helpful as it seems you can carry more, if you need to. other sites said that if it is frozen, it won't be subjected to xray
(who the hell would agree their breast milk should be xrayed) gah!
https://www.tsa.gov/travel/special-procedures/traveling-children
I also read that a breast pump is not considered a carry on item rather a medical device and most women felt they were endlessly having the darn thing inspected
I can definitely see why this is worrying you. I was glad I read more about it as I can see where you are coming from on all angles
Coming back to live here is such a great thing for you, it's a shame they have made it so hard on you to get to this point *hugs*

 

[Casey_03]

Oh, that's only for domestic flights in the U.S. though (( Those rules don't apply for my flight. It's some crazy Polish airline. I've heard all sorts of horror stories about security forcing women to taste their own breastmilk, or confiscating the breast pump ... and one story about a woman being forced to pump her milk in the security line. I think that's contributing to my anxiety as well. I suppose I will try to be optimistic about this and aim to write a humorous blog post or something about my experience! Or maybe it will go perfectly smoothly and I won't have to turn it all into a joke .. If security does give me a hard time, I am whipping out my phone and recording the interaction and telling them it's going up on YouTube