Junebug,
For me it meant using EFT to recognize, accept, and make changes to the different aspects of the trauma, so when I try to think about them and try to get myself worked up about them again, I can't and continue to have a SUDS level of 0 with them. In my experience doing EFT has been a way to accept and address the individual parts of the trauma at the same time. Usually I start with what I am aware of (a memory, feeling, belief, trigger etc.), concentrating on it and do rounds of EFT on it. During this process I usually have other things come up, things that may not have been on the surface, so then I do rounds of EFT on those things as well (other memories, feelings, thoughts, beliefs etc.)
I'll give you an example, during one of my sessions I was doing EFT for the fact that I was so upset that this woman I never knew was murdered. I started to do a round of EFT for the fact that I felt so sad that she had been a mother, when the thought of my own mother just came up. Through this process I discovered that one of the reasons that I could not let what happened go was because the woman murdered was a mother and had a family and I am very close to my own mother and have always had a fear of her dying in some awful violent way. The pain I was feeling surrounding this particular part was not so much that the woman murdered was a mother, but how I would have felt if she had been my own mother murdered.
I did EFT rounds for how I would feel if my own mother had been the one murdered and for the fear I had about her dying violently like this woman had and I felt an emotional shift. Now I can think about the whole "mother" part of the trauma and it no longer bothers me, I no longer feel that pain and sadness that I just couldn't understand for so long. This was a connection that was never made unfortunately through out my years of talk therapy. I really had never broken each aspect of the trauma down into such detail before, and considered so many outside contributing factors to each part. When I say outside contributing factors, I mean personal beliefs, fears, memories, feelings, or meanings that I may have tied into the trauma on a less conscious level.
I've experienced years of thinking I had everything under control only to fall apart again and again, until now. I never could experience memories of the trauma feeling calm and at peace like I do now.
I did several sessions of EFT and journaling, most of it was done at home by myself in front of a mirror, with a notebook, pen, and tissues. I'm certainly not recommending this, I'm just telling my personal experience. I had sessions that lasted for hours, I felt very sick sometimes afterwards, sometimes I would fall asleep I would feel so exhausted and tired. I had times where I felt very strongly that I did not want to do EFT and continue to work on things.
PTSD advantages? Maybe I should have said advantages to not healing my PTSD and getting better. There were personal advantages for me to not get better and remain sick that I needed to address. After being sick for so long with PTSD I felt comfortable with it, the unknown of getting better and having more of a life seemed scary to me. Change can be very scary. Yes what I was experiencing wasn't great, but at least it was familiar to me. Not getting better meant I could stay in the familiar. In some ways it was also a form of protection for me, If I got better and started "living" my life, getting outside and doing things might mean a greater chance to have really bad things happen to me again. If I got better, maybe my husband wouldn't love the "changed me", we met after my trauma and after I was diagnosed. If I'm sick, I can get out of things, and people may expect less from me, I don't have to worry about backsliding or disappointment of failure after trying.
I'm not saying these thoughts were right or true, but they were beliefs I had at the time and they seemed to make sense to me.
I hope at least some of this answers your questions and makes sense.:)
For me it meant using EFT to recognize, accept, and make changes to the different aspects of the trauma, so when I try to think about them and try to get myself worked up about them again, I can't and continue to have a SUDS level of 0 with them. In my experience doing EFT has been a way to accept and address the individual parts of the trauma at the same time. Usually I start with what I am aware of (a memory, feeling, belief, trigger etc.), concentrating on it and do rounds of EFT on it. During this process I usually have other things come up, things that may not have been on the surface, so then I do rounds of EFT on those things as well (other memories, feelings, thoughts, beliefs etc.)
I'll give you an example, during one of my sessions I was doing EFT for the fact that I was so upset that this woman I never knew was murdered. I started to do a round of EFT for the fact that I felt so sad that she had been a mother, when the thought of my own mother just came up. Through this process I discovered that one of the reasons that I could not let what happened go was because the woman murdered was a mother and had a family and I am very close to my own mother and have always had a fear of her dying in some awful violent way. The pain I was feeling surrounding this particular part was not so much that the woman murdered was a mother, but how I would have felt if she had been my own mother murdered.
I did EFT rounds for how I would feel if my own mother had been the one murdered and for the fear I had about her dying violently like this woman had and I felt an emotional shift. Now I can think about the whole "mother" part of the trauma and it no longer bothers me, I no longer feel that pain and sadness that I just couldn't understand for so long. This was a connection that was never made unfortunately through out my years of talk therapy. I really had never broken each aspect of the trauma down into such detail before, and considered so many outside contributing factors to each part. When I say outside contributing factors, I mean personal beliefs, fears, memories, feelings, or meanings that I may have tied into the trauma on a less conscious level.
I've experienced years of thinking I had everything under control only to fall apart again and again, until now. I never could experience memories of the trauma feeling calm and at peace like I do now.
I did several sessions of EFT and journaling, most of it was done at home by myself in front of a mirror, with a notebook, pen, and tissues. I'm certainly not recommending this, I'm just telling my personal experience. I had sessions that lasted for hours, I felt very sick sometimes afterwards, sometimes I would fall asleep I would feel so exhausted and tired. I had times where I felt very strongly that I did not want to do EFT and continue to work on things.
PTSD advantages? Maybe I should have said advantages to not healing my PTSD and getting better. There were personal advantages for me to not get better and remain sick that I needed to address. After being sick for so long with PTSD I felt comfortable with it, the unknown of getting better and having more of a life seemed scary to me. Change can be very scary. Yes what I was experiencing wasn't great, but at least it was familiar to me. Not getting better meant I could stay in the familiar. In some ways it was also a form of protection for me, If I got better and started "living" my life, getting outside and doing things might mean a greater chance to have really bad things happen to me again. If I got better, maybe my husband wouldn't love the "changed me", we met after my trauma and after I was diagnosed. If I'm sick, I can get out of things, and people may expect less from me, I don't have to worry about backsliding or disappointment of failure after trying.
I'm not saying these thoughts were right or true, but they were beliefs I had at the time and they seemed to make sense to me.
I hope at least some of this answers your questions and makes sense.:)
