What Advice Would You Give To Your Young Adult Self?

[hodge]

It's not clear to me whom you are addressing, Albatross

 

[The Albatross]

Myself of course. The topic was, "What Advice Would You Give To Your Young Adult Self?" right?

 

[hodge]

Oh, thanks for clarifying that. I didn't know if you were addressing someone else. But, duh, the thread says. I think that is good advice you gave to your younger self.

 

[Go Hungry]

Hmm.. Actually.. I don't know what I could tell him that would help. 15 was an utterly beautiful time in my life, because I was.. It's hard to explain. My mania was in full tilt at the time, so I was experiencing a world beyond understanding. Seriously, people pay hard money for hard drugs in order to catch a glimpse of what my life was like at that time. I wouldn't want to take that away from him. Even with the horror that I endured during those days.. I still think it was a wondrous time.

Later though.. I would have advice for myself around the age of 21-22. I would tell him to chase certain people.. At least to try. (But I did...)

I would tell myself about becoming a smoker, so he could avoid that. I would tell him all about PTSD and bipolar and co-dependence and the alcoholism in our family. I would tell him about Kid and Fiend for damn sure. I would give him the name of a very specific therapist, so he could save his time with the others... I don't know if any of it would do any good, because honestly.. how can you expect someone so young to comprehend the things that it took you 40 years to understand yourself? All the clues were there, all the pieces of the puzzle.. and yet I didn't see them.. couldn't correlate the contents of my mind. If only I had really known the effects of PTSD back then.. I probably could have put things together a lot sooner.

Aargh. No use worrying about it now. :(

 

[Meadowsweet]

That not all sober adults are bad, some can be trusted and will won't blame me and understand it was wrong and help me get some help.

 

[Hope4Now]

I've been thinking about this for a whole day. I don't think my 15 year old self would have believed me, no matter what I said. I was already too shattered by then.
What would I say if 15 would trust me?

• "You get to define yourself. Your truth. You get to decide what you think, what you wear, what you do, who your friends are, who you love and why, and what you believe."
• "It's alright to be complicated. It's alright to be sensitive. It's alright to be afraid. It's alright to want love and protection."
  
• "You are strong and brave."
• "What they say is not true. None of it is true."
• "Your values do not have to be their values."
• "Your body is yours. People come in all different shapes and sizes. Bodies are good."
• "Sex and love are related but not synonyms."
• "You have a right to exist as you are. You are a good person."
• "There are other gender options and sexualities, and they are all normal and fine and human."
• "It is not your responsibility to make other people happy. You will not be annihilated if you don't."
• "Make decisions that make you feel good. Do not allow them to poison that."
• "Trust your gut."
• "Don't stop painting. Ever."
• What you think and feel and believe and experience is important."
• "Love freely. Yourself and everyone else too."
• "Forgive and forget generously, but only after you let yourself acknowledge you've been hurt."

 

[Deleted member 29920]

Move out, find some decent friends, get a job, never look back, your parents are cruel and they'll never change!

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Update. I do have one piece of advice.

I'd tell her that her philosophy on life is CORRECT! (And better than expected, but I wouldn't say this last bit as the first part is more than enough.)