General What are the nice things you do for your sufferer?

[dulcia]

I've been getting onto my guy recently about eating healthier for two reasons: (1) I want to be more physically fit and am trying to adjust my lifestyle, including eating habits, to help me reach that goal. And it's a hell of a lot easier to cook one healthy meal for both of us, than a healthy meal for me and a shit meal for him. Plus, then I'd just be tempted to have the shit meal, too; and (2) I don't want him to die on me.

The suggestion above to tweak his favorite meals to healthier versions is an awesome idea. For lasagna, I use ground turkey instead of ground beef (although I do still do the pound of sausage), use less mozzarella than I used to and skim mozzarella instead of full, and use different noodles. There is a brand here in the states that makes "protein noodles". They not really that much healthier for you, but they are not as bad and have higher protein than typical noodles, so that's always a plus. When worst comes to worse, I just add a vegetable to his favorite meal and we eat that first (when possible), so that maybe we won't eat as much of the crap because we're full of the veggies already. Example of his typical/favorite meals with adding veggies: pizza (salad before pizza is ready), fried catfish (bread it with whole wheat flour and bake instead of fry in oil, add broccoli), lasagna (what I said before, with side of string beans instead of the usual loaf of garlic bread). I've also just straight up started substituting some things -- yogurt with chocolate chips instead of ice cream (he complained at first but if it's there in the fridge, he'll eat it); flavored fizzy water instead of sodas; spaghetti squash instead of regular spaghetti noddles (this is one of my favorites! and with the sauce, I really think it tastes the same). Also, making sure he has a decent breakfast (PB toast and banana, egg and sweet potato cubes, cereal and strawberries) seems to help crave his snacking urge throughout the day. Whenever we go out to a restaurant, we also split a meal. Portion control is a great point, too. I'll make his plate with less than he would normally serve himself, or only prepare 4-6 ounces of whatever meat we're having (not ideal if you're cooking to have leftovers) so that he doesn't keep eating just because it's there. If you are making leftovers, portion out each meal into separate containers (5 ounces of protein, side of veggies, potatoes) instead of just three massive containers of meat, veggies and potatoes.

All in all, if I don't buy a lot of crap, it's not around for him to eat. Not to say he doesn't have his chips and candy, but I swap out some of it for healthier options and he'll eat it because it's there.

 

[dulcia]

Another thing I'm working on is timing food throughout the day. If we go to the gym in the morning, that's when we need more carbs/sugars (good carbs like oatmeal, good sugars like fruit) to give us energy. By the end of the afternoon/evening, we're just going to sit around on our computers, so we don't really need any energy -- so just protein (meat) and veggies for dinner.

 

[dulcia]

Last thing! My favorite kitchen toy is a zoodler (they're available online through places like Amazon). It reminds me of a little food guillotine that has different attachments for different things. There's an attachment that makes big noodles (I sometimes make "noodles" out of zucchini and squash, a great alternative to spaghetti noddles), small noodles (I like to do carrots, cucumbers, zucchini and/or squash and sautee them to make a stir fry), or a slicer (great for making home made potato or sweet potato chips). There are a million ways to use it and there are all kinds of resources and recipes on line. I think the craziest thing I did was make large "noodles" from an apple, baked it in the oven, sprinkled some cinnamon and powdered sugar on top and made a sort of apple pie wanna be funnel cake :p

 

[Never_falter2]

Thank you so much. Can we discuss cooking over in the other thread?

Is there other things people over here do for their man?

 

[Sweetpea76]

I listen to him and try to do thoughtful little things that are meaningful to what he tells me. Like once, at the grocery, I passed a gumball machine that had stickers of his favorite childhood cartoon character. So guess who got a sticker on their Dorito bag that night? Yep. That's how I roll.

 

[Never_falter2]

That's sweet, but, you know, once I bought something for him he told me he enjoyed in childhood and he was a bit offended because he thought I was thinking he was like a kid.

 

[Deleted member 43988]

Thanks, guys. You know, my guy sometimes has odd ideas and one of this ideas (and only lately I le...

I loved your post, thank you, made me think, what would I do in your situation;- Well first you have to find the right moment, when he brings it up himself, then say, "OK, lets talk about it" and sit down with him, ask;- What is your plan? How much weight would you like to loose? Assess if that is realistic, and then maybe suggest a 'Low Carb - High Protein', also called the bacon diet, it is the easiest diet in the world. When ever I wanna loose a few pounds, I jump on it for a few weeks, up to two month, which is the max you should be on this diet in one stretch.

Just listen to him, say you will support him, take him serious, don't say, you don't agree that he is too fat, he knows best at which weight he is comfortable (unless there is an eating disorder involved) and help him, but let him set the terms of his own diet. Just my humble opinion.

I heard that in the USA you can buy minced meat from chicken or turkey. This is not sold at the su...

In Denmark too, so depending how far you are from the border, you may be able to get it. It is usually very difficult to get a butcher to meat for you, as they have to clean the mincer between each batch of different meat, and they wont do that for just a pound of meat.

What would that low carb noodle substitution be?

Here is the recipe for one of his favorite chili...

I would exchange potato and corn, with chickpeas, low in carb, high in fibre. The rest is fine.

Potatoes and corn, have a lot of starch in them, so does most high-carb foods, like potatoes, pasta, rice and bread. Starch crystalizes in the intestines creating gasses, which makes us bloated and feel uncomfortable. Most people would loose rotund look, if they ate far less starchy food.

If he has a sweet tooth, I can recommend marzipan, with a minimum of 60% almonds, they are extreemly healthy, and flattens the tummy.

 

[Linzee]

Lovely to read so many caring, positive posts.

I simply give my friend space and put no conditions or judgements on him. I keep his personal thoughts and issues safe and in trust.

I buy him his favourite BBQ crisps and chocolate mousse when I know he's coming over.

I never freak out or make a big deal of the night terrors or trembling as he sleeps.
Sometimes he likes to sleep embraced, resting his head on my chest (I guess for comfort and safety). And the trembling and goes away altogether. Physically I'm petite and so much smaller in size compared to him. But he sometimes clings on like a child (not at all sexual). I love feeling that I'm helping him and being there for him, but I never mention it the next day or embarrass him. Its very private (was...).