I really relate to not even being able to comfort myself. I've had to work on this simply being okay...like I have lots of shame over even allowing any self comfort. I was interested in a tiny stuffed animal on a shelf in my therapist's office (of course the smallest one). She was willing to get it for me but I wanted to get it myself. It nearly the whole hour to drag myself on the floor, stopping, looking away from the stuffed animal, just needing to rest, lots of tears. My therapist understood this as a process in itself so stayed close and brought along Kleenexes. In the end I was a few inches away but could not get it so allowed my therapist to give it to me (she also let me take it home). I think I needed that long and uncertain process and support. Now I can hold a stuffed animal for comfort!!! (slow going here!)
Certain sounds are soothing so I have gotten pretty good at allowing that. But also, going for a walk is often helpful because my worst feelings involve feeling stuck or trapped or immobilized...and just getting out and moving can pull me out of a descent into that pit. I still struggle with comfort and can't tolerate sadness really, but these are things that I know help. So it's a start.