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What Is On Your Mind Right This Second?

Manufactured mayhem, in all its forms, seems to be the least acknowledged and recognized, yet in the same twisted vein, also the most convenient to use when assigning labels to or dismissing anyone who shines a light on their experienced version of it.

Grateful for maintaining somewhat of a sense of humor to help pad the blows of the consequences of the blunt force trauma of what appears to be and feels to be truth.

Recognizing that each individual gut feels and translates its own version and definition of truth based on so many different variables remains the trickiest part for my head and heart space to digest.

No wonder things keep getting more insane rather than more humane as we continue to outsmart and outsource ourselves in so many different directions. Key word being "out", not "in"....except for the insane part. How ironic, ay?

I often wish I could curl back up into my stoic not giving a f*ck state of existing that I inhabited in my late teen early 20s years, but then I remember what got me to that state, and that there's supposedly a damn good reason why the windshield is bigger than the rear view mirror.

I wonder if flutter bys ever wish they could crawl back into their cocoons?
 
So I am thinking my life and my self is bad, very bad indeed. And then I feel I am bad, and I have no one, and then I am using the emotional reasoning to feel I am bad, and then I am thinking how I am bad. I am struggling. I am doing a lot of emotional reasoning. It is a long term vicious cycle. I am feeling bad about myself and my life.
 

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