What To Do About Explosive Mindset

[Bloomy]

I know what Im supposed to do - eat more food, do mindfull stuff, yoga, meditate and walks in the forest.

Yeah and usually it helps.

Just not at the moment. Im obviously so angry Im a little worried about it.

Went to city to find running shoes. Bad bad bad idea. I only came as far as to first shop and I knew I was on the edge of what I can endure. They didnt have the shoes and I had to try some more stores.

Its warm weather, I got sweaty, to much people and in all I just cant handle it.

I know the part about eating more food is a severe case and maybe a good reason. Im not anorektic.
Just have a problem with eating. If it was about control I would force my self to eat. At the lowest Ive been down to 800 kcal a day. Im trying really hard to hit "jackpot" that is to get around 2000 kcal. Its hard.

I feel like Im a steamer about to blow up. Its like a vulcano building up.

Im just so so so tired and at a loss at the moment. Im tired of being so angry. Of getting so easily irritated. Nervous. Edgy. And so forth.

Everthing seems to be a big pull yourself and your act togheter thing.


:cry::cry:

 

[Elevatorguy]

I know what Im supposed to do - eat more food, do mindfull stuff, yoga, meditate and walks in the forest...

NORGE?

 

[Bloomy]

@Elevatorguy - yeah Norge and so?

 

[ladee]

@Bloomy, you described where I am most days here recently. And the food thing.. I'm just not hungry. Or I wait until I am so hungry I don't digest the food I did eat, my stomach is in a knot all the time.
And if someone inadvertently hits the wrong button with me, well, I just don't know what will happen. Hopefully I will have that few seconds to just walk away, but I'm not promisin' nothin'....
Maybe we are both on the edge of a breahthru, let's just say that is what is going on.. It will at least give this misery some meaning... Hope you feel better soon and vent vent vent... we have our own answers in our writing or someone here just nails what is going on... when we are "IN" it, we just can't see. Sending you gentle hugs while I still have some...

 

[Elevatorguy]

@Elevatorguy - yeah Norge and so?

I'm American Norwegian myself. Nice to meet you. My name is James

 

[Elevatorguy]

NORGE?

I like to walk away from the situation , breathe and think of other things

 

[Elevatorguy]

@Bloomy, you described where I am most days here recently. And the food thing.. I'm ju...

Keep on venting , seems to always help

 

[Bloomy]

@Elevatorguy - Im obviously so on the verge that even for you to say you are american norwegian made me go tick tick. Nothing personal towards you. I just have a restrained relationship to Noway. And I am a irrational tickin bomb at the moment hence this thread...

Expet that I find it interesting you are so. There is 4 mill of you in America if Im right? Who in you family was Norwegian? And before I detorate totally - lets go back the explosive me issue here as I need to vent it in a safe place.

@ladee how much is your daily kcal intake since you dont eat so much either? I dont eat until my belly cries of hunger. I get dizzy and on a constant to low bloodsugar. Im hungry, but no apetite for eating. Seems unatural somehow to eat anything. And Ive spend so many years being so healthy until this...
Speakin of break through - I actually finally landed a job interwiew tomorow. So tonight Ill do my best to eat to be more stable tomorow morning.
Ladee - I sincerely hope it means so. I need a positive turn quikly. I also have nausea and sometimes that causes me to nearly vomit certain food or eating to much. Im careful to portion intake like a chichiuaua dog. They can only eat certain amount of gram before they blow up.

Breathe James used to work. Now it seems any of the tricks I tricked myself with doesnt work as they should. Therefor Im at a loss.

It seems typical norwegian to want to run away to a cabin in the forest when life gets complicated and thats my exact thought right now,
For the weekend. Escape in the hope that some days away from the world canoing and being surrounded by nature will relive some.

 

[Elevatorguy]

@Elevatorguy - Im obviously so on the verge that even for you to say you are america...

My parents. Go to the forest if it will help. Get away from people

 

[ladee]

I get outside and away from people too @Bloomy, just to have nothing but nature distracting me, so this sounds like a great plan..
Couldn't really tell you what my calorie intake is... I know it is like you, around 800 to 1000 on those days that food just isn't happening... I know I don't get 2,000 ever. It doesn't make me sick, unless I eat too fast, just don't pay any attention until I am hungry... you might try finding some snack foods that would help... Things like granola bars, ect to keep your blood sugar up and running.. and yes, try to get some food in before the job interview. I know for me, I get to where I can't think, or when I speak, it sounds so forced... have to think about every single word before it comes out of my mouth. Not a good way to be at an interview....
I hope you get the job...
I know for me, I just don't pay attention to my stress level until something like feeling angry all the time gets my attention...So possibly either on here or at home, make a list of things you are angry about. Don't edit, just write.
Some of it may seem petty, but that's not the point.. a lot of petty things can build up in me until something stupid seems really big...
And I am not saying for you to stay miserable, but I am saying, some days we are just grumpy and angry.. It is the human condition... not everything is a crisis that needs tending to.. sometimes we are just off and need to recharge. I have lived with this stress so long, unfortunately I don't pay attention like I should. Don't know about you, but some days, I just want to forget I have PTSD and be a gripey woman... just because I can... I don't let it go on for days tho, without trying to see what is going on, but sometimes for me, I just try and accept that I am in a mood....
It will make sense to you when you get on the other side.... in the meantime, try to be easy on yourself.. take that trip and enjoy nature and just BE.... hoping things balance out for you soon ... hugs.

 

[EveHarrington]

It's ok. I've had times like this where I cannot even be around people in public. I think it's good that you pushed yourself to simply try---- even though it didn't work out in the end.

 

[Bloomy]

I think it has been building up some time. Its not just one bad day but a serial of bad days that accumulated today.

But yes as I read you guys you are right. Its part of life. Cant be superwoman all the time and if I trod on Ill eventually be ok soon again.