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Why Did You Choose That Username And/Or That Avatar (Or No Avatar At All)?

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I chose my username because it seems to be the best way to explain how my life is. I've suffered a great amount of pain which has made me quite literally bitter towards people but the few people in my life who I love and trust I am very sweet. Even though I've gone through such a horrible thing, through it all I was still able to find the most amount of happiness someone in my situation could possibly have.

As far as why I chose this avatar, I chose it because I find a secluded waterfall in the woods to be the place I take myself in my mind every time I panic or start to have flashbacks. I always find the most comfort in secluded areas with calming clear and blue water.
 
My username is the title of a poem by Morrissey, who've I've been obsessed with since I was about 15. I don't listen to him much now because for complicated reasons he ended up being somewhat of a trigger . . . but I hope to listen to and enjoy him again one day. Here is the poem:

'So then I went to Liverpool,
and got held up outside a
nightclub by two merchant
seamen who said:
"give us your money or give
us your trousers."
And as I handed them my
trousers ...
(Well, you've got to make the
Most of Life, haven't you?)
Morrissey
August/Winter Eighty-hate.'

My avatar is such simply because I love the picture - it's from 'The Tale of Miss Moppet' by Beatrix Potter. This picture illustrates the moment when she opens up the duster in which she trapped a mouse by tying him up in it to find that he has escaped through a hole in the cloth. The look on the cat's face amuses me whenever I see it. It has a particular quality of confusion and disappointment that I think illustrates how I feel about many aspects of life: " . . . What? How? Why? . . . Oh."
 
I've changed my avatar several times already. the first too bright, the second too dull. This is a mediation area in FL and seems to fit the space. What I need-peace!
 
I chose my username as it is my goal in life. To live in the present. Too much time is spent reliving or living in the past, or worrying about the future. I chose my avatar as she represents this to me. She has not a care in the world and she is focused solely on playing with that shoe. Plus I thought she was cute.
 
I chose this username because of a very close friend of mine. He helped me get out of my abusive relationship, stayed with me all afternoon after our classes and made me feel safe (my boyfriend was stalking me on my campus. He also went to the college I was at after we broke it off for good so he could be "close to me"), and he challenged my family dynamics and loathed my brother. Whenever he would quote me in his journal or something, he called me MissAntiSunshine because we had to sit in the shade so I wouldn't burn, and we often had to change trees according to the sun. <3

My avatar is a character named Miho, which my best friend used to call me because I reminded him of her, as he says and as is said of Miho in her comic, darkly cute. This picture is an isolated portrait from the comic called Broken Miho, where she has broken metal wings and is trying to fix a gadget.

I feel like I'm trying to fix my gadgets too.
 
Miss anti... You crack me up as well as many others here do in that when i am just going to post something somewhere you and others post there just seconds before I that seems to "Top" or make my post seem insignificant as that yours are so powerful........

I was just on the prowl and in search of a picture of a meadow with a little girl of blonde around age of 2-3 preferably wearing a "osh kosh" like blue/pink coveralls in it to use as my avatar.... Of course there is an accompanying story I would share of in the memories of my adopted daughter which i need to get out to make one of those snail like giant steps in admitting my weakness that I have come to accept was buried deep in me so if anyone can find one that would be great as I get flustered finding pics that seem perfect but the caption says "copyrighted"!
 
Missanti-

This avatar is that of a little girl in a meadow. It is like the picture that is emblazened of a time nearly 27 years ago in my oh so at times foggy memory. This picture brings back one of the greatest and happiest feelings I ever had in real life when I was with my first wife at around the time of my daughters adoption. We were in upstate NY we had decided to pull off the road after visiting the Catskill game farm (a zoo where there is a lot of physical interaction with wild and domestic life) to enjoy a light lunch in a meadow filled of beauty and love like that of a new father can never fully reveal or express. There is a picture of her now at around 27 28 years of age in a place that in which features her as a now a woman arms stretched out in a field that everytime I view it it brings heart ache that i am not as close to her now as i was then because of my undoing .....

nj
 
Rain- Otis Redding -"feeling like it's raining all over the world.."

Some of the worst memories of my upbringing were in an area where it rained 9-10 months out of the year but my mentor - Bob, who saved my life - told be to stick it out there or I would never make it (I left after a year sober but kept coming back due to him to face my life). I mostly remember the sent of muddy wet hay-like grasses, smoky air from field burning, my children being born, taken from me, abuse, rapes, being beaten, recovery, and love.But I learned to read the best classics there, go figure..

Sometimes it feels like it's raining all over the world - sometimes it's love, sometimes it's pain, sometimes it's love it's hate. I love Otis Redding :)
 
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