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Wife Moved Out. Starting The Divorce

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My monthly disability check came in today. I have never been so scared of having money in my account. I don't trust her at all. I paid all my bills today and have a payment plan set up with everyone. I feel wonderful knowing that I can afford this apartment on my own. I love this apartment.

I sent out a message to her asking not to take more than what is her check out of our joint account.
 
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Rather than asking her to remove herself from a joint account, Why not close that account and open one in just your name? You've paid all current bills. Like changing the locks, maybe it's on you to set up a new online banking to pay your bills.


I don't think her reaction is great, by any means, but given the break up situation, she's angry. And your demands seem a little offputting to me.

If you broke up with her, and she's not happy about it, then expect some anger as she processes the loss.

At least she's not being threatening (or is being careful to not do so) on the text exchange. She sounds offended and shocked that you are attacking her character by implying that she would steal from you based on withdrawing her paycheck, which I assume is auto-deposited into your joint account.

Has she stolen from you in any way before? If not, then your texts seem a little impatient, distrusting, hostile, and preemptive. I'm seeing a side to you, real quick.

No need to twist the knife. Setting the boundaries is enough. You're keeping the apartment, the pets/fur babies/joint account also? But she is supposed to extract herself and leave with nothing out of the time together than her stuff?

You don't sound very generous or fair, really. You sound a little entitled. Just my opinion. I don't feel comfortable feeding your self-pity, no matter how well-earned, because I don't see it as healthy, so this will be my last post on your thread.
 
She ended the relationship and moved out. I tried to make the relationship work. I didn't want the relationship to end.

Every time there is a deposit made to our account she will withdrawal all of the money leaving me with left over change to work with. Whenever I would ask for money she would refuse. Even though we live apart. She is living in the city where she has always wanted to live. She doesnt want to live in the town I am in.

I asked her above to not do it this time as I have paid bills today and wanted to make sure that she didn't take more than her check.

It is a credit union down a few blocks away. It is my account that she was added too.

I'm sorry but I don't trust her. Everything she promises or says she will/would do is followed up with disappointment and I am left hanging.

I have learned so much from this.
 
Maybe I just don't understand what's happening. When did she start withdrawing nearly all of her check? After leaving or before?

I am seeing that there is a transition and a trust issue with her basically abandoning you in waves, first physical, then financial. Is that correct?

Sorry if I was judgmental.
 
Yes. She left me hanging. Making promises when she left that she would stood help with all the late changes on all the bills. I had to go to the town and ask for help with my electric because it was being disconnected. I have no internet or cable and left owning hundreds. When my received my 403b, she bought all new furniture for herself after I had already bout her a new car. She never asked me or talked to me about spending the money. One minute I had enough money for a year, the next the bank is calling with over drafts. She used credit cards of mine with asking leaving with over 30,000 in debt. I was served the night of voting to appear in court for one of them.

She promised when she moved out that she will keep me on her medical insurance for another year so I can have a Bilateral knee replacement. The other day she told me that I have a month left on her insurance and she is taking me off.

I am a little upset and rude to her at this point. I am just shaking in anger.
 
I hope you took her name off the account or opened a new one. As far as the debt, hopefully your cousin can help you with that. As far as benefits, I would ask your cousin if she can remove you. Legally she may not be able to . Sending support:)
 
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