Worst Therapist Story

[Justmehere]

Worst therapist story?

Oh dear. My experiences are so bad most therapists won't even attempt to treat me if this know my trauma history alone because I was so traumatized by one therapists that they went to prison. So many others won't even deal with me because they say I will have too much negative transference...

Which is true. After the criminally awful therapist...

I had one therapist tell me there was no hope for me outside of her.

Another therapist who tried to set me up to date her son.

Another who showed up at thanksgiving dinner with my family. She knew my uncle and knew I would be there. She still came with no warning to me. Awkward doesn't even begin to describe what that felt like.

I have had 1-4 sessions with about 24 therapists - vast majority of them ended badly.

I got to a point where I refused to be alone in a room with a therapist. I was so desperate and everyone was pushing for me to get help... And somehow I found a therapist who did equine therapy who met outside. I used to joke that she used cute foals (who were healing from their own trauma) to bribe me to come back. Took me two years before I could be alone with the therapist in a room, but it was worth it.

Including her, I have had 4 therapists that I have seen for at least 20 times each that have changed my life. All 4 good therapist had extensive trauma training. All extremely respectful of boundaries. All took things slowly with me. I was allowed to say no to all 4. They have all challenged me in huge ways, and I would be dead without their help.

But the rest of them? I still get angry just thinking of some of the shit said to me. It was beyond unhelpful. There are so many with arrogant savior complexes... And they seem to do the most damage.

 

[joeylittle]

it is accurate to say that neither psychologists nor psychiatrists know anything about trauma. God help us.

No. It might be accurate to say that not many do. I'm fortunate, I have a few good ones - but they are out there.

 

[HFA_Cat]

What timing for this thread. My worst experience ever happened, believe it or not, last week. I've had the same T on and off for 20 years. I went to him first for domestic violence (abuse) - after a few years, he got me past that. So when my brain started doing bizarre things some 4 years ago, I went back and learned I have dang PTSD.

I started therapy, stopped. Finally am ready to go again. We began 3 months ago: faithfully every Thursday. Until week before last, when his girl called & said he needed to cancel. No problem: I'd see him the next week. There really WAS a problem, a damn big one. I'd had an uber bad week: I was thinking BAD thoughts. Just figured I could hang on until the next Thursday, when he'd logic me out of it as he always did.

I had quite the list by the time last Thurs. rolled around, as he'd had to cancel the prior week. At the LAST minute I had some kind of inkling, because I called a half hour prior to my appointment. I talked to his girl for a moment then said how utterly relieved I was, in that thank GOD I'd be speaking to him in a minute. You can guess - Oh girl, you're not on his schedule this week. He has another client. Oh but you're still scheduled NEXT week.

I of course told her I was in serious trouble, and for once it was my turn to pull the emergency shrink thing. I =NEVER= expected to hear, "Well he can fit you in for 10 minutes between appointments." I went silent in shock. What part of "suicidal" had she missed? This isn't something I do often: this was the SECOND time in 20 years. And he can "fit me in?" I politely hung up, then sent an email instructing them to cancel any further appointments. AND that's that.

I so wanted to say "Ask him what bubble gum machine he pulled HIS empathy card out of, will you?" But I didn't. I did go and find this book another friend has been bugging me to get: it, with a new T, would do me great good. I have the list of T's, and will start calling tomorrow. But, BAH!! Phooie on him, ya know?

 

[sun seeker]

@HFA_Cat, are you absolutely sure he was the one at fault here, and not his secretary? If you have gotten along so well all this time and this behaviour seems uncharacteristic, is it possibly a miscommunication between him and his secretary? I don't know, but if it were me, I'd want to check it out with him personally.

 

[Whyteferret]

Here's my take on this:
1. Do research into any therapist you're going to see. Any complaints on license or disciplinary actions? Is he/ she licensed?
2. Find out what specialities. Some will list on Internet. You can also ask the receptionist what their specialties are.
3. Report this shit when it happens, especially anything totally unethical like trying to date you or leaving you in crisis. File a complaint with the licensing board in your state.

 

[HFA_Cat]

@HFA_Cat, are you absolutely sure he was the one at fault here, and not his secre...

Sun, she was literally *stuttering* with embarrassment, if you know what I mean. She'd had to excuse herself for a moment to "check the book" which we both knew meant she had to speak to him, as the book lives right in front of her. I imagine Dude had an emergency patient: such has happened before, but he alerted me and asked before. And of course THIS time... !

 

[HFA_Cat]

Here's my take on this:
1. Do research into any therapist you're going to see. Any complaints on...

OMG I never thought of that. This guy is head of psychiatry at one of the country's top teaching hospitals - I've always thought I was extremely lucky until now.

Report him? How does one do such a thing? Normally I never would, but if that character did this to ME in this shape... I won't be the only one.

 

[sun seeker]

I see. So sorry that happened to you. I can imagine you were devastated.

ETA (reply to #42)

 

[Whyteferret]

OMG I never thought of that. This guy is head of psychiatry at one of the country's top teaching hospit...

@HFA_Cat
There should be a state regulatory board in your state. In WA, it's the department of health. An Internet search will probably pull it up.
"Mental health license" or "therapy license". I know more about WA than any other state.

 

[The ANP]

worst therapist was at a childrens psychiatric hospital I was 17 and had begun therapy following a suicide attempt. My mother had died 2 years prior, I was experiencing neglect because my remaining family was all on drugs, I had been socially ostricized and terrorized by a group of boys at my highschool who had kidnapped, tortured and sexually assaulted me. Of course I had no words to talk about any of this at the time my diagnosis was depression. I was talking about ongoing problems in an abusive relationship with my then boyfriend (it was his friends who tortured me).. the therapist said that I was having normal teenage problems, there was nothing wrong with me and not to come back and see him.

 

[Deleted member 33880]

we should write a book

 

[The ANP]

Second worst therapist was one for my young child. Had worked with him for a year. She decided that because of his fathers mental health issues that I needed to go to court and request sole custody. I spoke to a lawyer who told me that with what was actually going on there was no way the court would give me anything more than shared custody and that it was better in the eyes of court to maintain both relationships basically it would be traumatic for my kid to cut dad out of his lie. (I agree). Told the counselor my lawyer advised decision, she resigned on the spot and told me to get psychological help for my "splitting". Several ethical concerns from abandonment to diagnosing both parents and providing custody recommendations outside her scope...