Research Writer Looking For Info On Ptsd

[Sideways]

Romance:O_o:

Not a word in my vocabulary. Is there a chapter on that in the PTSD Handbook so I can understand what y'all are talking about!?:shifty:

 

[ghotiff]

I might get backlash for this but ... the comments that say you can't write a romance novel with a character with PTSD implies to me that a person who has PTSD can't ever have a enjoyable romantic relationship. That's a very negative perception.

 

[Zanshin]

@Ragdoll Circus - Fairy tale time!
Once upon a time, in a land far, far away... people cared about other people and didn't hurt them... We call that romance...

@ghotiff - Thank you, that was my objection to everyone else's negative reaction. I don't think stereotypical bodice ripper erotica, but there can be romance... Though I understand it's not what works for everyone.

 

[Sighs]

Lol - I read one once when my vet was isolating. It was called Snowbound with A Soldier. Apart from a couple of thousand yard stares and a couple of gruff "You wouldn't understand!" type comments the hero was as passionate and romantic and open as any other cardboard Prince Charming. All it took for his "walls to crumble" was a couple of kisses in front of the fireplace. And they lived happily ever after...

I would have thrown it across the room into the damn fireplace but it was on the Kindle App on my iPhone...

I'd love to see a more realistic piece of fiction. Not necessarily considered a romance, but a relationship driven novel - I guess they'd call it chick-lit. I've often thought if I had the time I'd write it myself. Not sure if any publisher would touch it though. Between the angry outbursts, the co-dependency, the suicidal ideation, the struggle to get meaningful help, the isolation... Also not sure how to construct a narrative arc from the demoralising grind of the endless cycle of PTSD - just when you think things are going well you end up right back where you started.

 

[Sighs]

If you want to read a non-fiction book about a soldier who comes home with PTSD after being physically harmed in a war situation (and how his partner coped with it) I highly recommend The Fighter by Paul Warren.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

@ghotiff thank you, thats what i was saying! That and its been done before. Not just with PTSD but a lot of other mental disorders, books and movies.

Goodness, the individual wants to write that someone loves another with PTSD . Isnt that what we want? To be loved by someone? Isnt that a good thing? I think so, just my opinion though.

 

[joeylittle]

Not to dump a bucket of water on the thread, but if the guy had said 'relationship' instead of 'romance', would this be such a debate?

It's true, language is all there is on an internet forum, and so, language and word choice matters a great deal. On the other hand, asking for clarification never hurt anyone.

I don't expect our guest to come back or post again - and it's pretty forward, for a guest post - but, the meaning might not have been this:

 

[EveHarrington]

I might get backlash for this but ... the comments that say you can't write a romance novel with a char...

Jumping to great conclusions here.

I know why many women read romance books. It's to escape from the reality of their hum-drum lives. No, not all romance books are the same-----but those readers want an idealistic happy ever after kind of ending. My point was that the idealization of PTSD could make it all worse for the public perception of the PTSD community. It had nothing to do with people with PTSD not being capable of romance.

When someone, anyone from out there posts about wanting info about PTSD----the only thing I care about is them walking away with the truth. The realities of PTSD aren't going to get those readers hot and bothered (and that's what many romance novels aim to do).

 

[lostforgottensoul]

@joeylittle :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:

Love the guy though! :p

 

[lostforgottensoul]

One would think that people with PTSD cant have a successful relationship with romance in it. Whats the damn difference anyway? I would love a guy thats romantic! Romance isnt just sex therefore a romantic novel isnt all sexual. Not all romantic fictional novels are 50 shades of grey; Ive read many that arent!

I do know of at least one MOD whom is a supporter that has a suffessful relationship and Im sure they have plenty of romance.

I hope that book is written and I hope it ends with the relationship works out with plenty of romance. The more mental illness is talked about in this way, the less stigma there is.

 

[Sighs]

people with PTSD cant have a successful relationship with romance in it

Yeah. Its sooo romantic when he isolates for days and I don't know if he's alive or dead. Its so romantic when he yells and breaks things because he is having an amygdala hijack. Its so romantic when we can't go out to dinner or the movies because his hypervigilence won't let him relax in public. Its so romantic when neither of us have slept for 3 days because of the nightmares. Its so romantic when... oh, sorry, that isn't quite the script you want.

:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::banghead:

PS - please sufferers do not take offence - I love my vet to the moon and back, but I have a tattoo on my arm that says "not a fairytale" for a reason...

 

[Sighs]

On a more serious note - what concerns me about this is that it is another example of the myth that true love conquers all.