1. ...you’re on a first name basis with your pharmacist,
2. ...you list ‘cutting’, ‘drinking’ and ‘crying’ among your hobbies on job application forms,
3. ...the last time that you saw an episode of MASH you had to be hospitalised for three weeks,
4. ...your favourite section of the newspaper is the obituaries,
5. ...the closest you’ve come to having sex in the last three years is a colonoscopy,
6. ...your super effective weight-loss technique is… anxiety,
7. ...you’re on more medication than your grandmother, but you have a less active social life,
8. ...you find yourself eagerly counting down the days to Armageddon,
9. ...you wake up with a hangover, and all you drank the night before was a cup of tea and a glass of metamucil,
10. ...your nearest and dearest friend lives on the other side of the world and is known to you only by the online username, “night_stalker”.