Therapist Sent Me Into An Attack

[Justmehere]

Were you able to talk with your therapist about what you experience when you see that image?

 

[Gs172003]

Were you able to talk with your therapist about what you experience when you see that image?

I told her immediately after.

 

[Gs172003]

We haven't talked too much about it yet

 

[sun seeker]

That doesn't sound so odd to me, not for someone dealing with abuse issues anyway. Is this a new trigger or have you always reacted this way? Sometimes, I find new triggers arise as I am working on something and then fade once I've dealt with it.

 

[Sideways]

Would it help you at all to reframe this in your mind? Like, the book triggered me, not my T. My T did nothing wrong and I can still trust her. It was just dumb luck that this book had this front cover and I ended up seeing it....?

 

[Gs172003]

That doesn't sound so odd to me, not for someone dealing with abuse issues anyway. Is this a new tr...

I haven't really encountered it since Im picky about what I do ( read, see, etc). I didn't know either were sending me those things so both were a shock. They were two separate times.

Would it help you at all to reframe this in your mind? Like, the book triggered me, not my T....

It was just bad wording. She didn't trigger me the people did. I apologized to her. I don't know why I felt like I had to but I did.

Ugh I'm so bad at this when it's stressful.

I didn't apologize about what I said here. For some reason I just felt like I had to apologize to her. I've done that before. I had a panic attack and later felt like I had to apologize to my husband. No idea why. Just did.

 

[Freedomfighter]

On accident. And I'm not entirely sure why. She sent me the picture of the cover of a book that sho...

Yes, I think Violet Butterfly hit it on the button. These images trigger our nervous system and remind us of past abuse. To me such images often remind me of a fake marriage, in which I was abused, but still did not realize it.
Furthermore such images make me cringe because so many things that are being depicted about relationships are either cliche or totally fake. As soon as I see an image or hear an insinuation that is fake and contrived all of my senses scream: not true.
By that I mean that my system reacts positively to honesty and real feelings, anything that speaks of purely physical relations in my mind has nothing to do with reality. Also, there is prostitution all around and I am so purely disgusted by anything that has to do with prostitution I often block those kind of images out.

I also think that many publications just go for the shock value, I noticed a book recently and the cover of it was showing a female clad in underwear, totally disgusted by that, because it lacks decency, it lacks moral confidence.......
There is just so much wrong with today's society.

 

[Gs172003]

Yes, I think Violet Butterfly hit it on the button. These images trigger our nervous system and...

I talked about this with my T yesterday. She said the picture wasn't even wasn't what I thought it was about. My mind wouldnt let me look at it long enough to figure it out.

That said she wants me on meds for the exposure therapy. She thinks we can't move forward without it. I don't want them but what can I do??

 

[One step at a time]

The meds are a choice you can make. Exposure therapy kind of involves triggering yourself on purpose. You already experience getting triggered while un-medicated. You know how it feels. Your therapist is probably suggesting meds because getting triggered and having flashbacks intensifies during the exposure therapy, and being on the right meds may insulate you from some of the pain. She may be concerned about you safely coping with that pain.

I've been doing it without meds, and I think the worst is over, now. It never caused me to be at risk of physical harm, but
there was a while when I was not functioning at all. I am lucky that spending a few weeks not doing any work did not result in losing my home or job or anything. Not everyone's circumstances allow that. You may decide that for stability, for safety, or for another reason, meds are a good idea for you.

Another thing to think about is that different meds work for different people. You might need to spend time trying different ones. Doing so will involve experiencing side effects, which is a whole 'nother roller coaster.

 

[Gs172003]

The meds are a choice you can make. Exposure therapy kind of involves triggering yourself on...

I've been on a roller coaster all week but I've managed without meds so far. But I haven't had to face the reason I'm here all the way yet either.

That said the reason for this thread I forgot about the day after. That is how I work. The really triggering stuff just "disappears". I even forgot I started this thread.