My apologies for leaving half way through the post. I had a bad week and got stuck in isolation mode. I'm sorry it's taken me so long to re-emerge, you all have responded with really insightful and encouraging posts that I appreciate.
@Mina that's great you found it helpful. You're right, I really haven't built up that sense of trust yet with the therapist. I don't think I could do what you did so soon. That's a great idea about sticking to other issues in the mean time.
@joeylittle - thank you for explaining (far better than the therapist did!) the technique used.
I have very few coping skills at the moment. My attempts at managing symptoms have ended up doing more harm than good. (Relapsed into eating disorder trying to control suicidal thoughts). I also recently relapsed with a substance abuse problem, have only been clean/ sober for a few weeks.
I recently moved house and have no real support system around me. The support I did have, I have isolated myself away from as I feel too ashamed to see people.
Reading this back makes me realise I really need to manage these issues. I thought they were just secondary symptoms, that it would be better to focus on the cause, but perhaps not?
@Lotis - Yep. The first time I met her, she got me to explain the events and flashbacks. :/ I felt so uncomfortable. I really wish I had just spoken up about this. She kept prodding me for more details. There wasn't really any cooling down period, there was a bit of an abrupt ending.
@missy meier - Oh my gosh, that must of been really tough. :/
Do you think it helped overall? I really hope it did.
@NatBird - Thank you for the name, I've never heard of it before.
She didn't ask for a timelime, just for me to write the worst events out.
I just felt extremely uneasy, the first intro session seemed all over the place and unprofessional. She was more interested in hearing about the traumatic events and flashbacks than anything else and kept asking for more and more detail, asking questions like 'did he rape you?'. There was no background history (for other mental health problems) and she seemed to lack knowledge regarding trauma. It didnt fill me with confidence when she mispronouced basic psychology therapy techniques and didn't know what SNRI's were. The intro session felt a bit too intrusive, I thought it would be a getting to know each other session, were we discussed a mental health timeline, the therapeutic technique she used, giving me a rough idea of what the sessions would be about. It was nothing like that and was more jumbled up than this paragraph! :p
Sorry have more to write but shall have to come back later as phone is about to die.