mumstheword
VIP Member
Thank you so much @WishfulThinking123 !
I really appreciate the validation!
I'm having a lot of feelings of worthlessness and exclusion arising at the moment and so I am very grateful to be countered on that :-)
-
We are a multilingual website again. Read the notice about this.
-
Understand AI use at MyPTSD: all AI use is explained in our AI help page. AI use is by choice here. It exists if you want it, but does nothing unless you choose to use it.
Art therapy - share your work here
- Post starter Emalulalu
- Start date
- Status
Thank you so much @WishfulThinking123 !
I really appreciate the validation!
I'm having a lot of feelings of worthlessness and exclusion arising at the moment and so I am very grateful to be countered on that :-)
Hi Mal.
Thanks for this thread. I had a request from some I talk to a lot. To tell the a story about something that was not related to trauma. So I thought this could be a good opportunity for me to try and write a story. It is a true story don't remember what years it was early 80's. It is the story of a poor choice made by our skipper. I quit after that trip It was already risky being out their you don't need to take extra changes. so here it is. I am hoping for comments and encouragement
A Hurricane One Night At Sea
So a sea story with hurricane force winds 95 knot winds out of the south east with heavy down thrust gusts to well over 100knots. Very damaging winds. A true story
I worked on a Hearing fishing boat. The season started in February and was over by April. This We were gone 56 days. Lots of bad storms on the North Pacific through fall and winter but these spring storms where different. Short and Violent they could be. This season was a bad one or had been then this night it got worse.
We had been hold up on the Central Coast of British Columbia Behind a Light House station on anchor for 5 or 6 days. We were waiting for the storm warnings to end so that we can make the open water crossing I think it is about 80 miles to the Queen Charlotte Islands and an area called Carpenter bay.
The storm had let up and the skies clear for the first time in several days. The storm warning came off. So the skipper and the skipper of another boat decided we would haul anchor and head across to the islands.
The boat I was on was a good boat and well maintain so I had no worries about trouble we had been through lots of storms so far. The other boat was a 40 foot troller was not as good of a boat it had it limits.
About 4 hours out it was getting ruff again and still a huge swell from the last several days of storms it was going to be dark soon. The radio went off with a warning of a rapidly approaching Storm with high winds and heavy destructive gusts.
The other boat turned back he could run back for cover. The skipper decided to continue as it was 4 hours back or 6 hours to the fishing grounds and we knew the fish were there and there had already been reports off small spawning. We are fishing for the hearing for the row. We were towing two 28 foot hearing skiffs.(flat bottom boats to pull the nets over when fishing)
Was on my well watch when the storm had caught us. I was listening to The coast Guard talking to this Navy ship that was to be out there looking out for the fleet. the C/G asked for a weather up date the navy guy said it was a steady 95 knot wind out of the south east with gust topping 115 Knot's. The C/G ask if they had any others boats on their radar. He said yes about 20 miles south of him.
They ask if we were on this station I came back and told them we were. he asked me the weather was and before I could answer all hell broke loose. I told him I would get back to him.
The first thing that happened was the lock on the stairs down into the folks hole (where we sleep) and they swung out and all the cans of nuts and bolts and spares stuff that you had to have when at sea (No Stores to go to out there) Any how I didn't need to wake everyone that did the job.
There was 4 of us on the boat we all new what we had to do. I told the skipper the coast guard was waiting for a report and there was a loud crash on deck that is my domain I was deck boss and responsible for everything out there. So I am out of the wheel house and into my boots and on deck. I don't know what strength of wind you have been in steady 95 with heavy gusts will blow you right off your feet and then you would be a goner.
I stepped out the door and the skipper had turned on the overhead lights now we can see we are lit up about a 100 foot cycle around the boat. On the poop deck (the back deck) there is a half house (We call it a baiting claim it is a place for us to work out of the weather some while baiting halibut gear our main fishery) the noise I had heard was one off those 115 knot down drafts had bent it down to the deck. We had to get to the back of the boat to see how the skiffs were doing. They were doing ok half full of water they had drains we just had to keep moving.
I went and gave the skipper the news he's changed course and we tried to stay in the trough in between the swell (These were large swells 50 to 60 feet easy) with the wind on the Quarter stern. That was way easier on the skiffs. We told the coast guard we had some minor damage but we were continuing and not in any trouble.
We got to Carpenter bay and waited for 2 days while the rest of the fleet came over safely. It was a silly risk that skipper made he made a few more after that but i had moved on to another vessel by then.
Hope you like my story of one of the times I was in a hurricane at sea.
Peace be safe my friend
Thanks for this thread. I had a request from some I talk to a lot. To tell the a story about something that was not related to trauma. So I thought this could be a good opportunity for me to try and write a story. It is a true story don't remember what years it was early 80's. It is the story of a poor choice made by our skipper. I quit after that trip It was already risky being out their you don't need to take extra changes. so here it is. I am hoping for comments and encouragement
A Hurricane One Night At Sea
So a sea story with hurricane force winds 95 knot winds out of the south east with heavy down thrust gusts to well over 100knots. Very damaging winds. A true story
I worked on a Hearing fishing boat. The season started in February and was over by April. This We were gone 56 days. Lots of bad storms on the North Pacific through fall and winter but these spring storms where different. Short and Violent they could be. This season was a bad one or had been then this night it got worse.
We had been hold up on the Central Coast of British Columbia Behind a Light House station on anchor for 5 or 6 days. We were waiting for the storm warnings to end so that we can make the open water crossing I think it is about 80 miles to the Queen Charlotte Islands and an area called Carpenter bay.
The storm had let up and the skies clear for the first time in several days. The storm warning came off. So the skipper and the skipper of another boat decided we would haul anchor and head across to the islands.
The boat I was on was a good boat and well maintain so I had no worries about trouble we had been through lots of storms so far. The other boat was a 40 foot troller was not as good of a boat it had it limits.
About 4 hours out it was getting ruff again and still a huge swell from the last several days of storms it was going to be dark soon. The radio went off with a warning of a rapidly approaching Storm with high winds and heavy destructive gusts.
The other boat turned back he could run back for cover. The skipper decided to continue as it was 4 hours back or 6 hours to the fishing grounds and we knew the fish were there and there had already been reports off small spawning. We are fishing for the hearing for the row. We were towing two 28 foot hearing skiffs.(flat bottom boats to pull the nets over when fishing)
Was on my well watch when the storm had caught us. I was listening to The coast Guard talking to this Navy ship that was to be out there looking out for the fleet. the C/G asked for a weather up date the navy guy said it was a steady 95 knot wind out of the south east with gust topping 115 Knot's. The C/G ask if they had any others boats on their radar. He said yes about 20 miles south of him.
They ask if we were on this station I came back and told them we were. he asked me the weather was and before I could answer all hell broke loose. I told him I would get back to him.
The first thing that happened was the lock on the stairs down into the folks hole (where we sleep) and they swung out and all the cans of nuts and bolts and spares stuff that you had to have when at sea (No Stores to go to out there) Any how I didn't need to wake everyone that did the job.
There was 4 of us on the boat we all new what we had to do. I told the skipper the coast guard was waiting for a report and there was a loud crash on deck that is my domain I was deck boss and responsible for everything out there. So I am out of the wheel house and into my boots and on deck. I don't know what strength of wind you have been in steady 95 with heavy gusts will blow you right off your feet and then you would be a goner.
I stepped out the door and the skipper had turned on the overhead lights now we can see we are lit up about a 100 foot cycle around the boat. On the poop deck (the back deck) there is a half house (We call it a baiting claim it is a place for us to work out of the weather some while baiting halibut gear our main fishery) the noise I had heard was one off those 115 knot down drafts had bent it down to the deck. We had to get to the back of the boat to see how the skiffs were doing. They were doing ok half full of water they had drains we just had to keep moving.
I went and gave the skipper the news he's changed course and we tried to stay in the trough in between the swell (These were large swells 50 to 60 feet easy) with the wind on the Quarter stern. That was way easier on the skiffs. We told the coast guard we had some minor damage but we were continuing and not in any trouble.
We got to Carpenter bay and waited for 2 days while the rest of the fleet came over safely. It was a silly risk that skipper made he made a few more after that but i had moved on to another vessel by then.
Hope you like my story of one of the times I was in a hurricane at sea.
Peace be safe my friend
abbynormal1929
Silver Member
Hello,
I'm a songwriter/composer. I do both singer/songwriter and instrumental music. I could post some of my lyrics here.
I've been really lonely lately, and I'm definitely an advocate of using art to socialize.
I'm a songwriter/composer. I do both singer/songwriter and instrumental music. I could post some of my lyrics here.
I've been really lonely lately, and I'm definitely an advocate of using art to socialize.
Last edited by a moderator:
There is copyright rules so anything posted has to be original and posted by its creator. If you did a help ticket they would fill you in
Peace be safe
D
Deleted member 33052
I'm trying to write. Words aren't coming easily, but I felt like I had to get this poem out of my system. I started it shortly after my stbx husband told me that he was leaving me, but as I edited it today, I realized that the subject of the poem is a composite of my abusers. Some of you have read an earlier version, and thank you so much for the support. Anyway, this is it. I don't plan to touch this one again.
.............................................
You can raise your banner one thousand times, Champion, and wage one thousand battles
Still your heart is not that of the warrior.
Argue one thousand positions with a Crusader’s zeal
Your veracity is yet unproven.
You may break one thousand hearts, or crush a single heart one thousand times, Conquistador
Yours does not know love.
Weep at the sight of one thousand distended bellies, mourn one thousand meaningless deaths
The sum of your tears do not equal compassion.
Hold fast to one thousand grudges, nurse one thousand hurts
Your barriers were not constructed on righteousness.
Deceive one thousand jailers into unlocking the doors of one thousand cells
There you remain, imprisoned.
Your lungs may rise and fall one thousand thousand thousand times.
Do any one of those breaths prove that you have lived?
Encase the fist that grips your lash in one thousand layers of somber regret
My wounds care not for your sorrow.
One thousand drops of blood sketch the topography of my soul as you look for my pity
I search, but can find nothing but disdain.
One thousand times I will suffer your strike, for with each the festering layers of trauma are flayed away
And on the thousandth, my soul will find its wings and transcend this broken and bereft place.
.............................................
You can raise your banner one thousand times, Champion, and wage one thousand battles
Still your heart is not that of the warrior.
Argue one thousand positions with a Crusader’s zeal
Your veracity is yet unproven.
You may break one thousand hearts, or crush a single heart one thousand times, Conquistador
Yours does not know love.
Weep at the sight of one thousand distended bellies, mourn one thousand meaningless deaths
The sum of your tears do not equal compassion.
Hold fast to one thousand grudges, nurse one thousand hurts
Your barriers were not constructed on righteousness.
Deceive one thousand jailers into unlocking the doors of one thousand cells
There you remain, imprisoned.
Your lungs may rise and fall one thousand thousand thousand times.
Do any one of those breaths prove that you have lived?
Encase the fist that grips your lash in one thousand layers of somber regret
My wounds care not for your sorrow.
One thousand drops of blood sketch the topography of my soul as you look for my pity
I search, but can find nothing but disdain.
One thousand times I will suffer your strike, for with each the festering layers of trauma are flayed away
And on the thousandth, my soul will find its wings and transcend this broken and bereft place.
Last edited by a moderator:
D
Deleted member 33052
Abby, I would be thrilled to read anything you'd like share. Thank you!
That was awesome, mum! I'm glad you found this thread, and thrilled that you shared!
This poem killed me, mum. May I please print it out just for myself?
@Esterio, I'm so happy that you felt able to share a part of your life with us. Thank you!
You, my friend, are priceless. Your abusers wanted you to believe you were worthless or unlovable, but that was a lie to keep you in check. Your poems radiate with strength and authenticity, and reflect the pristine beauty of your soul. (((mum)))
Last edited by a moderator:
mumstheword
VIP Member
Wow, thank you so much Mal! What lovely, lovely compliments!
Yes, you are very welcome to print "They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger".
It was this thread that inspired the poem, and a title of a book and a conversation with my guy, but primarily having this thread to just go for it :-).So thank you!
Hi Mal my next store while I was at sea
Fire at sea
We where out on a halibut opening on a boat that I worked on for many years. We were a crew of 6 working 3 shifts !6 hours was whats was supposed to be. I was deck boss so usually my days where 18 hours or more one deck. The skipper was an old guy But tough as nails and cool hand Luke. He was a gambler and he had work hard and in bad situations lot.
On opening day we were setting out Long line gear. ( Long line gear is rope that sinks to the bottom and has a hook every 3 fathoms or 18 ft. one long line called a skate of gear was 1800 ft long. It was ruff while setting the gear and we came off the top of a wave and landed on a small log which broke our cooling pipes for they engine. When they broke free we started to take on water slowly. It was in the fish hold and we would loose are ice that we needed to keep our fish cold for 3 weeks before we could deliver.
So we needed to stop the water coming in. To do this we needed to cut away Fibre glass and the foam insulation over top of where these bolt broke and get the holes plugged.
The skipper of this boat was also the Man that built it. He knew the measurements off the top of his head to tell me where to cut. The cooling pipes were 35 feet long and were on the outside of the hall of the boat so no way to see them. I cut where he told me to and sure enough I was right where the holes were that needed plugging. I had to cut in 2 places and plugged all the holes.
So we head back out of anchorage heading back to the fishing grounds. We were getting close to our gear and I turned around to look forward and all I could see was black smoke coming out of the engine room vent. I ran for the wheel house and met the skipper heading down the a short hallway I followed.
We had are the right fire suppression equipment it was an automatic system that had been ordered disabled by Steamship Canada that governs boat safety. Any how when he turned it on it blow the line apart. Sounded to me like an explosion it wasn’t. The skipper called me back he show me where it had come apart and told me he would hold the line together and get me to turn on the valve on slowly so he could hold it the lines together a few seconds later the fire was out.
I don’t know if there is any worse feeling than the boat on fire and you are 20 miles from the beach. We had burned all the wiring in the engine room so now no power for anything but 1 VHF radio. We got towed into anchorage and with an hour the skipper had the engine running radio’s, radar, autopilot and sounders working and we headed back out to our fishing grounds and fished for 17 days caught a good load of fish and headed for port to deliver our fish. The end
Tell me if you could picture what was going on.
Thanks for this thread Mal
Fire at sea
We where out on a halibut opening on a boat that I worked on for many years. We were a crew of 6 working 3 shifts !6 hours was whats was supposed to be. I was deck boss so usually my days where 18 hours or more one deck. The skipper was an old guy But tough as nails and cool hand Luke. He was a gambler and he had work hard and in bad situations lot.
On opening day we were setting out Long line gear. ( Long line gear is rope that sinks to the bottom and has a hook every 3 fathoms or 18 ft. one long line called a skate of gear was 1800 ft long. It was ruff while setting the gear and we came off the top of a wave and landed on a small log which broke our cooling pipes for they engine. When they broke free we started to take on water slowly. It was in the fish hold and we would loose are ice that we needed to keep our fish cold for 3 weeks before we could deliver.
So we needed to stop the water coming in. To do this we needed to cut away Fibre glass and the foam insulation over top of where these bolt broke and get the holes plugged.
The skipper of this boat was also the Man that built it. He knew the measurements off the top of his head to tell me where to cut. The cooling pipes were 35 feet long and were on the outside of the hall of the boat so no way to see them. I cut where he told me to and sure enough I was right where the holes were that needed plugging. I had to cut in 2 places and plugged all the holes.
So we head back out of anchorage heading back to the fishing grounds. We were getting close to our gear and I turned around to look forward and all I could see was black smoke coming out of the engine room vent. I ran for the wheel house and met the skipper heading down the a short hallway I followed.
We had are the right fire suppression equipment it was an automatic system that had been ordered disabled by Steamship Canada that governs boat safety. Any how when he turned it on it blow the line apart. Sounded to me like an explosion it wasn’t. The skipper called me back he show me where it had come apart and told me he would hold the line together and get me to turn on the valve on slowly so he could hold it the lines together a few seconds later the fire was out.
I don’t know if there is any worse feeling than the boat on fire and you are 20 miles from the beach. We had burned all the wiring in the engine room so now no power for anything but 1 VHF radio. We got towed into anchorage and with an hour the skipper had the engine running radio’s, radar, autopilot and sounders working and we headed back out to our fishing grounds and fished for 17 days caught a good load of fish and headed for port to deliver our fish. The end
Tell me if you could picture what was going on.
Thanks for this thread Mal
D
Deleted member 37085
Thank you @Mal Content for I just discovered this thread you initiated back in June...I'm in a writing class with published book authors...and I am trying on a very basic and rudimentary level to learn how to write my own thoughts/experiences/history in poem or in narratives...worthy of an audience.
Last edited by a moderator:
featherless.wings
Bronze Member
A Hard Today
Waking up tomorrow it's a whole new day,
Shadows of the downpour linger faintly.
Lightning ripped through dulled remorse,
Enlivening the bitter, brooding force.
Waiting for tomorrows a lifetime away,
On the only standing pillar in the quake.
Huddled in my tears the ticking tires,
Afraid tomorrow breathes perpetual fire.
Promise flashes headstrong in the smoke,
Allowing more than truth fit for a rogue.
Contented smiles replace this debt
Your memory will never squander to regret.
There's promise in the horizon but today,
Yeah it's a hard today.
Waking up tomorrow it's a whole new day,
Shadows of the downpour linger faintly.
Lightning ripped through dulled remorse,
Enlivening the bitter, brooding force.
Waiting for tomorrows a lifetime away,
On the only standing pillar in the quake.
Huddled in my tears the ticking tires,
Afraid tomorrow breathes perpetual fire.
Promise flashes headstrong in the smoke,
Allowing more than truth fit for a rogue.
Contented smiles replace this debt
Your memory will never squander to regret.
There's promise in the horizon but today,
Yeah it's a hard today.
abbynormal1929
Silver Member
Hello,
I am a songwriter. I don't have a way of posting the actual music but I thought I'd post some lyrics.
Welcome Me Unbound
My torso is a waterfall, drownin' my shirt
By now I should know not to wipe my eyes with my hands covered in dirt
The shadow above me conspires with everyone I owe
The sky out the window, luminous downpour, taunting me trapped in hope
Pressure builds up, in my skull from this hell
I wont even slow my sprint outside to grab an umbrella
CH:
Rain, Save me from shelter
Rain, steam as my skin cools
Rain, soot washed to the ground
Wild storm welcome me unbound
Nocturnal torrent roars, to share my elation
Boiling replaced by ripples, soothing my frustration
Like warring armies pacified, holstering every pistol
Dancing like midnight on new years eve, torrential armistice
Madness escapes, relief is sealed in
by a blanket of water, and a drift in the current
Ch
Inst
Ch
I am a songwriter. I don't have a way of posting the actual music but I thought I'd post some lyrics.
Welcome Me Unbound
My torso is a waterfall, drownin' my shirt
By now I should know not to wipe my eyes with my hands covered in dirt
The shadow above me conspires with everyone I owe
The sky out the window, luminous downpour, taunting me trapped in hope
Pressure builds up, in my skull from this hell
I wont even slow my sprint outside to grab an umbrella
CH:
Rain, Save me from shelter
Rain, steam as my skin cools
Rain, soot washed to the ground
Wild storm welcome me unbound
Nocturnal torrent roars, to share my elation
Boiling replaced by ripples, soothing my frustration
Like warring armies pacified, holstering every pistol
Dancing like midnight on new years eve, torrential armistice
Madness escapes, relief is sealed in
by a blanket of water, and a drift in the current
Ch
Inst
Ch
Changing4Best
VIP Member
I was wondering what you all do in the way of creative things, either at home, work (or wherever) or in therapy, as unofficial or official Art Therapy? What do you do, in other words, to relieve pressure, express yourself, be creative, that is therapeutic in some way?
I have been painting some tiny works of art with the focus being on emotions and how I deal with them. I do these at home, but show them to my Pdoc and my Therapist both, as well as their staff and some friends. They all have been impressed with these and have encouraged me to continue.
One thing that I have found to be very important is not to be a perfectionist while doing this. What benefits you get out of the doing of it, these are far more important than how "good" or "perfect" the creative thing comes out.
I am also crocheting a blanket with brightly colored yarn and it is getting quite large now!
I have gotten into baking a bit too. I made some pumpkin pudding this morning with stevia instead of sugar, as I try to stay away from the later as much as I can. So baking with sugar-free healthy sweeteners has been my focus.
Even if you are doing the same kinds of things as I am doing, I would love to hear about it; how it is going, what benefits you are having, etc.?
I guess what I am looking for would be other ideas too, as to what you folks like to do in your spare time (or even at work) or when you are in a tight situation, to divert your attention away from PTSD and all its various troubles?
Feel free to share images here, if you have any!
I have been painting some tiny works of art with the focus being on emotions and how I deal with them. I do these at home, but show them to my Pdoc and my Therapist both, as well as their staff and some friends. They all have been impressed with these and have encouraged me to continue.
One thing that I have found to be very important is not to be a perfectionist while doing this. What benefits you get out of the doing of it, these are far more important than how "good" or "perfect" the creative thing comes out.
I am also crocheting a blanket with brightly colored yarn and it is getting quite large now!
I have gotten into baking a bit too. I made some pumpkin pudding this morning with stevia instead of sugar, as I try to stay away from the later as much as I can. So baking with sugar-free healthy sweeteners has been my focus.
Even if you are doing the same kinds of things as I am doing, I would love to hear about it; how it is going, what benefits you are having, etc.?
I guess what I am looking for would be other ideas too, as to what you folks like to do in your spare time (or even at work) or when you are in a tight situation, to divert your attention away from PTSD and all its various troubles?
Feel free to share images here, if you have any!
Last edited:
- Status
Similar posts
Donation drives
Trending content
-
-
What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?
- goingonhope
Comments: 34K -
-
-
-
