I just read this thread for the first time. I can relate so much to so many things you post here. The "freaking out" (like I mean FREAKING OUT) when trying to "talk" to an inner child--hell no! Not now. Then not feeling anger AT ALL at my abusers who were also "nice" as you put it. You describe it so well I just never understood this dynamic until you explained what your therapist said. wow. Also, I had this relationship with this woman who would do exactly as your ex--playing therapist and trying to force me to do "inner child" stuff. i could not get myself out of that relationship no matter how hard I wanted to. I realized just this last year when doing therapy that she totally screwed me up. REALLY SCREWED ME UP. I did become angry because I was in therapy back then, and I could have gone through the therapy with that counselor on my own and let the relationship play itself out as it should have. She really interfered and I truly believe prevented me from attaching to my therapist and learning to to trust him. I was angry about this for several months and when I think about it, I'm angry still. I have a lot of work to do with protectors before I go talking to my inner child again. Anway, I say all that to say thanks for posting the question. Now that it has been a month since you originally were going through this, were you ever able to connect or feel any angry feelings toward your ex or your father? I had a boyfriend like your ex boyfriend and I came to realize I dodged a bullet when I split up with him. This "nice" guy laid back guy attitude was for alterior motives all the time. It was not altruisic like he would make it out to be. He'd even play the victim!
