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I can’t get angry at “nice” people. well, not really.

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My mom came across as very nice to the outside world. She came across as a victim at times. She could be flat out cruel. No one ever saw that. No one would understand if you tried to explain. I understand that frustration of that. Do you think your anger at nice people leaks out in other ways? What would happen if you tried to relabel "nice" with out words? Fake, manipulative, or even multi-faceted? What if you tried to do your art project and just focused on the behaviors that are angering, instead of the person as a whole? I really don't know if any of that will work, it's just some thoughts this stirred up.
 
I just read this thread for the first time. I can relate so much to so many things you post here. The "freaking out" (like I mean FREAKING OUT) when trying to "talk" to an inner child--hell no! Not now. Then not feeling anger AT ALL at my abusers who were also "nice" as you put it. You describe it so well I just never understood this dynamic until you explained what your therapist said. wow. Also, I had this relationship with this woman who would do exactly as your ex--playing therapist and trying to force me to do "inner child" stuff. i could not get myself out of that relationship no matter how hard I wanted to. I realized just this last year when doing therapy that she totally screwed me up. REALLY SCREWED ME UP. I did become angry because I was in therapy back then, and I could have gone through the therapy with that counselor on my own and let the relationship play itself out as it should have. She really interfered and I truly believe prevented me from attaching to my therapist and learning to to trust him. I was angry about this for several months and when I think about it, I'm angry still. I have a lot of work to do with protectors before I go talking to my inner child again. Anway, I say all that to say thanks for posting the question. Now that it has been a month since you originally were going through this, were you ever able to connect or feel any angry feelings toward your ex or your father? I had a boyfriend like your ex boyfriend and I came to realize I dodged a bullet when I split up with him. This "nice" guy laid back guy attitude was for alterior motives all the time. It was not altruisic like he would make it out to be. He'd even play the victim!
 
I just read this thread for the first time. I can relate so much to so many things you post here. The "...

No, I haven’t made any progress as my dissociation is getting worse for some unknown reason and it’s taking all I have to try to (unsuccessfully) stay grounded.

Everything is all f*cked up inside. I wish I could say I’ve made more progress but my anger is dissociated as ever. I can’t get mad in anything more than short spurts that quickly vanish into thin air.

My little one is terrified. She won’t come out. She trusts no one.
 
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