Hello. I Am New Here. I Have Been Living With PTSD For Over 30 Years Now. I Found This Site & It's Great To See ! It's Time I Gave Somekinda Input Instead Of Just Soaking In Your Great Posts. The One Thing That Has Stood Out To Me Is A Simple First Session I Had With A PTSD Specialist On My Very First Visit Out Of The Hospital. What Stood Out To Me To This Very Day Was His Remark About A Lemon. A Lemon ? Yea That's What I Thought At First. Let Me Explain:
"The Lemon"
I Was Referred To This Therapist By My Psychiatrist After Spending A 13 Day Stay In The Hospital. I Was Diagnosed With PTSD By Another Psychiatrist 6 Months Earlier. I Was In An Explosion On My Job Site & Was Burned Badly & Flown To A Burn Center In Georgia. The Burns Where Painful Of Course, But The 2 Year Recovery Was Hell.
During That Time Of Course They Gave Me A Little Something For My Nerves To Help Me Take A Deep Breath To Deal With The Long Painful Recovery Process. Then Finally I Try To Return To Work & Get On With What I Thought Would Be A Normal Life Again. I Had Permanent Work Restrictions Which Changed What I Had Done All My Life & Ended Up Fixing Broken Electrical Tools In The Tool Crib. Everything Seemed Fine & I Was Happy To Be Back. [ I Thought In My Conscious Mind ]. However, About 3 1/2 Months In ? A New Life Was Coming. After A Lunch Break One Day, I Went Back To Work. Yet I Noticed My Hand Was A Little Shaky & I Could Hear My Heart Beating Rapidly In My Ears. [ Heart Rate Was 260 BPM & Blood Pressure Was Off The Charts ]. Next Thing You Know Here I Was Again In Another Ambulance Being Rushed To The ER.
Well ? That Day I Was Introduced To The Power Of The "Subconscious Mind" Too. Had A Heart Cath & Loads Of Tests Just To Hear Them Say My Heart Was Fine. I Thought To Myself, "Then Why Am I Here Then ?" Then After A 3 Day Stay I Was Told I Had "PTSD". Went Home And Started Having Anxiety & Panic Attacks & Ended Up Back In The Hospital For That 13 Day Stay On The Psych Floor. Wow ! That One Day At Work. Although My Conscious Mind Was Fine, My Subconscious Mind Was Never Fine With It & Popped Me In The Back Of The Head Like A Iron Frying Pan !
[ Thanks For Sticking With Me Thus Far ]... FEAR Had Become My Worst Enemy. Well ? If You Think About It, Fear IS The Number One Enemy In ANY Disorder. Ok Ok. I Know Many Are Thinking, " Will You Get On To The Lemon ?!?"
OK, When I First Met The PTSD Specialist We Introduced Ourselves & I Had A Seat. The Doc Wanted To Check My Pulse & That's It. Then He Asked Me, "Do You Like Lemons ?" In My Mind I Was Like, "That's Odd ?" He Said My Wife Packed Me A Lunch & Put In It A Huge Lemon And Was Wondering If You's Half It With Me. I Told Him Yes I Like Lemons & [ Reluctantly ] Agreed To Take Half Just To Be Nice I Guess. Anyway We Got On With The Discussions & The Regular Doctor Patient Routines & That Took About An Hour or/ So. SUPER Cool Doc. He Set Me Up For My Next Appointment & We Shook Hands & I Reached For My Coat. Then He Said, "Oh ! Sit Back Down. I Forgot About The Lemon !"
Then He Proceeded To Tell Me [ After Taking Out His Pocket Knife To Cut It ] That He Would Roll & Squeeze It To Make It Nice & Juicy. [ I Did Notice He Was Looking At Me Intently Wile Telling Me This ]... I Was Thinking To Myself, " I Can't Believe I'm Fixing To Eat A Lemon With This Doctor ? Weird.".... He Rolled His Chair And Opened A Drawer & Said, " Come Here. Can You See It ? I Can't Find It ! " I Got Up Went Over & Looked. There Wasn't A Lemon In There. Then He Grabbed My Wrist & Said With A Smile, " Sit Down A Minute". He Said, " There Never Was A Lemon". He Said Look. I Watched You Closely. Your Feet Began To Move As Your Toes Slightly Curled. I Watched Your Facial Features Changed As Your Mouth Watered. Your Eyes Quenched. I Watched Your Body Totally Start Tensing Up & Yes, Your Pulse Rate Had A Big Increase & There's No Lemon Around. He Said That Is How Powerful Your Subconscious Mind Is. Your Body Reacted In Auto Mode Getting Ready For That Sour & Tart. You Were Physically Effected By Something That Isn't Even Here. He Said, That Is How PTSD Operates... Now Multiply That Times 50.
Thank You For Your Patience & Letting Me Share,
RussWork
"The Lemon"
I Was Referred To This Therapist By My Psychiatrist After Spending A 13 Day Stay In The Hospital. I Was Diagnosed With PTSD By Another Psychiatrist 6 Months Earlier. I Was In An Explosion On My Job Site & Was Burned Badly & Flown To A Burn Center In Georgia. The Burns Where Painful Of Course, But The 2 Year Recovery Was Hell.
During That Time Of Course They Gave Me A Little Something For My Nerves To Help Me Take A Deep Breath To Deal With The Long Painful Recovery Process. Then Finally I Try To Return To Work & Get On With What I Thought Would Be A Normal Life Again. I Had Permanent Work Restrictions Which Changed What I Had Done All My Life & Ended Up Fixing Broken Electrical Tools In The Tool Crib. Everything Seemed Fine & I Was Happy To Be Back. [ I Thought In My Conscious Mind ]. However, About 3 1/2 Months In ? A New Life Was Coming. After A Lunch Break One Day, I Went Back To Work. Yet I Noticed My Hand Was A Little Shaky & I Could Hear My Heart Beating Rapidly In My Ears. [ Heart Rate Was 260 BPM & Blood Pressure Was Off The Charts ]. Next Thing You Know Here I Was Again In Another Ambulance Being Rushed To The ER.
Well ? That Day I Was Introduced To The Power Of The "Subconscious Mind" Too. Had A Heart Cath & Loads Of Tests Just To Hear Them Say My Heart Was Fine. I Thought To Myself, "Then Why Am I Here Then ?" Then After A 3 Day Stay I Was Told I Had "PTSD". Went Home And Started Having Anxiety & Panic Attacks & Ended Up Back In The Hospital For That 13 Day Stay On The Psych Floor. Wow ! That One Day At Work. Although My Conscious Mind Was Fine, My Subconscious Mind Was Never Fine With It & Popped Me In The Back Of The Head Like A Iron Frying Pan !
[ Thanks For Sticking With Me Thus Far ]... FEAR Had Become My Worst Enemy. Well ? If You Think About It, Fear IS The Number One Enemy In ANY Disorder. Ok Ok. I Know Many Are Thinking, " Will You Get On To The Lemon ?!?"
OK, When I First Met The PTSD Specialist We Introduced Ourselves & I Had A Seat. The Doc Wanted To Check My Pulse & That's It. Then He Asked Me, "Do You Like Lemons ?" In My Mind I Was Like, "That's Odd ?" He Said My Wife Packed Me A Lunch & Put In It A Huge Lemon And Was Wondering If You's Half It With Me. I Told Him Yes I Like Lemons & [ Reluctantly ] Agreed To Take Half Just To Be Nice I Guess. Anyway We Got On With The Discussions & The Regular Doctor Patient Routines & That Took About An Hour or/ So. SUPER Cool Doc. He Set Me Up For My Next Appointment & We Shook Hands & I Reached For My Coat. Then He Said, "Oh ! Sit Back Down. I Forgot About The Lemon !"
Then He Proceeded To Tell Me [ After Taking Out His Pocket Knife To Cut It ] That He Would Roll & Squeeze It To Make It Nice & Juicy. [ I Did Notice He Was Looking At Me Intently Wile Telling Me This ]... I Was Thinking To Myself, " I Can't Believe I'm Fixing To Eat A Lemon With This Doctor ? Weird.".... He Rolled His Chair And Opened A Drawer & Said, " Come Here. Can You See It ? I Can't Find It ! " I Got Up Went Over & Looked. There Wasn't A Lemon In There. Then He Grabbed My Wrist & Said With A Smile, " Sit Down A Minute". He Said, " There Never Was A Lemon". He Said Look. I Watched You Closely. Your Feet Began To Move As Your Toes Slightly Curled. I Watched Your Facial Features Changed As Your Mouth Watered. Your Eyes Quenched. I Watched Your Body Totally Start Tensing Up & Yes, Your Pulse Rate Had A Big Increase & There's No Lemon Around. He Said That Is How Powerful Your Subconscious Mind Is. Your Body Reacted In Auto Mode Getting Ready For That Sour & Tart. You Were Physically Effected By Something That Isn't Even Here. He Said, That Is How PTSD Operates... Now Multiply That Times 50.
Thank You For Your Patience & Letting Me Share,
RussWork
