I should really sleep in my bed

[Gs172003]

I sleep on the couch. My poor husband doesn't like it. I'm laying awake right now because the "extra quiet" dishwasher is keeping me awake. Im hoping I can go back to sleep soon because I have to work in the morning. Something has to give.

 

[Freida]

Can you figure out the trigger? Lighting....sheets/bedspread... How the room is set up....how it smells... If you can figure out what is chasing you out then you can try different things to create a different environment.
Move the bed, find different bedding, light candles, etc...

 

[Gs172003]

I think it's a variety of things but ultimately a fear of what hubby may do.

 

[ChildofGod]

I sleep on the couch too. I was getting too many leg cramps and was sick of a bed.

 

[somerandomguy]

I think it's a variety of things but ultimately a fear of what hubby may do.

Well, is your fear justified? Has he been violent in the past? Has he made you do things you haven't wanted to do?

 

[Gs172003]

Well, is your fear justified? Has he been violent in the past? Has he made you do things you haven't wanted to do?

He hasn't.

 

[siniang]

Does he know about your fear?

 

[somerandomguy]

Maybe he reminds you of someone, right? That's the way I am with my wife, and it's completely unfair of me because she's never treated me like the person I get her confused with.

I forget, did you go back to therapy? It's something you could talk about with your therapist if you have one.

 

[Gs172003]

Does he know about your fear?

Yes

 

[Gs172003]

Maybe he reminds you of someone, right? That's the way I am with my wife, and it's completely unfair of me because she's never treated me like the person I get her confused with.

I forget, did you go back to therapy? It's something you could talk about with your therapist if you have one.

Yes he does and my therapist knows( I just started back for the third time). . She pointed it out to me when she talked to me Wednesday now that I think about it.
I had been wanting to redo my house because I simply just can't be there until I can wear myself out enough to go to sleep some. My therapist said basically "all the paint in the world won't change that your husband will still be there"and "He is paying for things he didn't do." She's right. Thank God my current husband has the patience of a saint.

 

[joeylittle]

@Zoogal - is there any way to set up a makeshift sleeping place for you in the bedroom, but not in the bed? Sleeping in the same room might be a good intermediary step towards sleeping same bed....

 

[Gs172003]

@Zoogal - is there any way to set up a makeshift sleeping place for you in the bedroom, but not in the bed? Sleeping in the same room might be a good intermediary step towards sleeping same bed....

There might but it might take some work. It's a pretty small room.