I want to talk about kinks, but not self harm. Who here was abused and your kinks kinda derived from that and you were able to work through your trauma by fetishizing it essentially. Prolonged exposure therapy, taking back control. I see people talking about the self harm side of it, but not how it can and has been effectively managed.
I was sexually abused as a toddler by my dad and sexually harassed by him up until the day I left. He yelled a lot (he was really angry) and hit me with a belt as punishments.
BDSM is really attractive to me, I was able to take what I was afraid of and make it exciting. But I haven’t ever done it with anyone, I would read erotic literature and fantasize. I fetishized the dominance/submissive dynamic, control, punishment, spanking, and consensual nonconsent. The fear I get from the belt trigger, intensifies the experience. I got more and more comfortable with the fear, to the point where it’s mostly just exciting now.
BDSM with a partner can be safe if managed correctly. Limits are discussed beforehand, safe word is put in place, there’s a lot of communication and respect going into the dynamic. BDSM is not abuse (but to anyone who was abused with BDSM, I’m very sorry, that’s terrible and very not okay or exciting).
I was molested in the shower when I was a toddler, I don’t think about showers in that way, like I’m scared of it being too much. I’m constantly working through flashbacks on that one, but I bet one day I will.
Has anyone else done this? What was your experience? It doesn’t have to be sexual abuse, just any kind of trauma and kinks.
I was sexually abused as a toddler by my dad and sexually harassed by him up until the day I left. He yelled a lot (he was really angry) and hit me with a belt as punishments.
BDSM is really attractive to me, I was able to take what I was afraid of and make it exciting. But I haven’t ever done it with anyone, I would read erotic literature and fantasize. I fetishized the dominance/submissive dynamic, control, punishment, spanking, and consensual nonconsent. The fear I get from the belt trigger, intensifies the experience. I got more and more comfortable with the fear, to the point where it’s mostly just exciting now.
BDSM with a partner can be safe if managed correctly. Limits are discussed beforehand, safe word is put in place, there’s a lot of communication and respect going into the dynamic. BDSM is not abuse (but to anyone who was abused with BDSM, I’m very sorry, that’s terrible and very not okay or exciting).
I was molested in the shower when I was a toddler, I don’t think about showers in that way, like I’m scared of it being too much. I’m constantly working through flashbacks on that one, but I bet one day I will.
Has anyone else done this? What was your experience? It doesn’t have to be sexual abuse, just any kind of trauma and kinks.