Does this count as trauma?

[Workingonit]

What bugs me the most. Is when I have money I buy every thing for my kid. Clothes, jewelry, toys, trips. People still want to tell me "its not for her its for the kid" bullshit since when. Should I tell my kid no ask your mom she takes money out of my check before I even get it. Shit is so corrupt. She gets to sit on her ass and do nothing and lie and cheat and because I'm not the type of person that runs around with a recording device. I have to put up with it. Because believe all women right? I'm so done with everybody. Is this even real life. And the shits of it is I'm not really even mad at her. I'm mad at the system for being one sided and abusive. I'm mad at society for not seeing that inequality has caused divorce rates to go up and reproduction rates to go down. And then they want to brow beat you about patriarchy and sexism against women. Its all unsustainable. Men are already checking out en masse. Military recruitment is at historic lows. Hope you're learning Chinese or Arabic. Ima be just fine. I sure as hell am not going to bleed and sweat for this crap again. Its embarrassing.

 

[Workingonit]

I feel better today. My back is sore and my elbows hurt.

 

[Workingonit]

I made a friend on my game. Hes a veteran with ptsd too.

 

[Workingonit]

He helped me not want to hurt people or implode my life

 

[Friday]

He helped me not want to hurt people or implode my life

Don’t kill anyone. Don’t break anything. <<< Personal Mantra. Keeps shit simple.

 

[Workingonit]

Don’t kill anyone. Don’t break anything. <<< Personal Mantra. Keeps shit simple.

God knows I'm trying

 

[Workingonit]

Avoidance is a bitch. Whenever I get mail from the va my heart starts racing.

 

[Sideways]

Snail mail? Or email?

If it’s email? Pack in all the tech bells and whistles that you possibly can.

When I was getting emails about claims and police investigations and stuff, I had it redirected to its own inbox sub-folder (which you can then check when you’re with T - maybe there’s somethere, if there is, I can deal with it then - or on a set day where you know you have a cruisier schedule, like Saturday). Emails are set to “notify me, instantly, always”, but most email services give you options to manage that, and take control of exactly how you receive those interactions and get that stressor to deal with.

Hearing you - it’s an absolute mofo of a stressor to be dealing with.

 

[Friday]

If it’s email? Pack in all the tech bells and whistles that you possibly can.

Ditto, @Workingonit

((Or I stop opening my email app full stop. And that’s no bueno. But I still do it. Back in the day I had dedicated emails for friends, family, work, f*cked up things I didn’t wanna deal with but was still choosing to, websites, & strangers (Also 3 mobile phones. Anyone/Everyone can have the number. Select peollle have it. Only important people have it.). Modernly there are filters / groups / folders / etc. Because screening calls/mail? Ain’t crazy. It’s pure damn sense.))

I put all my snail-mail in what “should” be the silverware drawer in my kitchen, and only sort it (now, later, how, now, how, later, later later, gator) once a week, and pay bills/etc. once or twice a month.

I have a finite capacity for stress, choosing when & how to spend my energy? Gives me a helluva lot more to play with.

 

[Workingonit]

Its snailmail. I have a pile that I dont really deal with. I received certified mail about my psychiatric visit for a second opinion? I don't really know how it works. My therapist thinks I might be having withdrawal from adrenaline. But he doesn't really know. He keeps giving me things to talk to the va doctors about. Right now its hard to breathe, my joints/back hurts. I'm real depressed. Its hard to focus.

 

[Survivor3]

I made a friend on my game. Hes a veteran with ptsd too.

That's good, what games console do you use? What's the game?

 

[Workingonit]

That's good, what games console do you use? What's the game?

World of warcraft. My mom bought it for me a couple days ago. I used to play it alot when I got home from iraq. I built a pc 6 or 7 years ago and I have that.