Undiagnosed Mugged Seven Years Ago

[JSKarma]

It's been an odd seven years dealing with this so here it goes...

I was 16 at the time. I decided to go to McDonalds after school and upon entering I noticed a group of sketchy 'thugged out' males. About 4 or 5 of them. I made nothing of it given that I lived in a fairly poor area and we had all sorts of people. So I got my order and left.

About 20 seconds after leaving I noticed one of them was right beside me. He asked me for the time and I told him it. He continued to be by my side then he put his arm around me. He was to my left. He started rifling through my pockets and took my crappy mp3 player. He demanded my phone and I pleaded that it was an almost worthless phone as the screen was broken and he decided not to take it.

That day changed my life.

I have never been able to leave my house without anxiety.
When I am out I am very paranoid and anxious.
I check the peep hole at least 50+ a day to make sure no one is trying to get in. I've tried to stop but I cannot.
If I think someone is following me when out, I assume they are scouting my place or planning on robbing me. So I circle until I 'deem it safe' to enter my place.
I'm too anxious to even take the garbage out, shovel, get mail etc.
I can barely feel comfortable of giving a cab my address.
I feel like everyone is out to get me.
I come up with all sorts of crazy scenarios. Like my girlfriend has a brand name purse so I think someone will see her come in and assume I'm rich or something and rob me. Goes beyond ridiculous.

I cannot go a day without thinking of what happened. It stresses me out. Makes me anxious.
Everyday I shadow box thinking of the scenario. It's all I think of when I work out.

The anxiety now has turned into some type of anticipation of it happening. It's like I want it to so I can defend myself because I couldn't before.

So, yea. Help me?

Thanks for your time. Goodvibes.

 

[Venusian]

Welcome to the forum.

I am sorry that you had to go through that kind of experience. There are plenty of people on here that can relate to what you experienced and what you are going through now. Hypervigilance is quite common with PTSD.

Look around the forum, do some reading and ask a lot of questions if you want to. There is a lot of information that can help, already on the forum and from a lot of great people that are here and want to help.

 

[Toria]

Hi JSKarma and welcome to the Forum. I cannot imagine what that scenario would do to an adult, but to a still-child at the age of 16 it has obviously left a long and lasting impression. There is a section, further down the Forum that covers Anxiety, perhaps you could read up on others' experiences and see if they can offer you any coping techniques.

Wishing you peace.

 

[anni]

Hi JSKarma, Goodvibes back.

Welcome here. I actually clicked on your story a little bit hoping it would be my son finally wandering into this place. He was mugged at gunpoint a few years ago, I think some testosterone poisoning is acting as a preventative in his seeking help at the moment. I'm glad you found the forum, hope you're able to hang around for awhile. It's an awfully, awfully good place to 'be' while plain, old healing across the board, for too many reasons to get into in one post. Well, I could but you'd leave out of boredom in the middle of page 8.

As a Mom who has had 3 of her 4 children pass through the 16 year old, normal kid's stop at McDonald's stage, gosh, your trauma made me want to put your 16 year old self in bed with chicken soup and a Doberman. Sooo awful, thanks for sharing. It can't be easy to speak of, I know my son avoids his unless ( ahem ) lubricated. Not the best sign.

Will shush, welcome JS. I do very much hope you'll hang around for awhile for your own sake, plus then can put your success story in my tackle box of lures to get my son the heck over here. :)

All the best,

Anni

 

[KP the nut]

Hi and welcome to the forum.

 

[JSKarma]

There are plenty of people on here that can relate to what you experienced and what you are going through now. Hypervigilance is quite common with PTSD.

Thank you, this is really the first time I'm confronting this and will be spending a long time in this forum. I haven't really looked much up on Hyper-vigilance so I will be doing that for sure as it seems to be my main symptom.

I did fear that being here would make things worse but so far confronting this has made me feel better (even just posting this thread). Surrounding myself with people who have been through things like this will make things better I hope :)

There is a section, further down the Forum that covers Anxiety, perhaps you could read up on others' experiences and see if they can offer you any coping techniques.

Thank you. I will be spending some time in that forum today :)

Welcome here. I actually clicked on your story a little bit hoping it would be my son finally wandering into this place. He was mugged at gunpoint a few years ago, I think some testosterone poisoning is acting as a preventative in his seeking help at the moment. I'm glad you found the forum, hope you're able to hang around for awhile.

I hope your son can one day confront it as it took me a while to even tell my significant other. Not easy to talk about but easier now that I have :) Thanks for your kind words...I definitely could have used that soup and Doberman back then as I was mostly left to deal with this alone.

Hi and welcome to the forum.

Thanks :)

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Welcome to the forum. :)

 

[MagiLisu]

Welcome to the forum.

You will find a lot of people who understand and are willing to support you here.

 

[anni]

I'm finding your writing very clear, your acceptance of the PTSD makes me hopeful. It's not cool to put someone on the proverbial spot, so please excuse one more post in your direction. My son seems to have just poof- put it behind him as if it were no more than a fall from a ladder or some illness one passes through. I'm not forcing some diagnosis on my son, just have been dealing with this stupid thing for a LOT of years and recognize what's up. In point of fact, if I want him to run like a bunny from getting treated all it would take would be for Mom to start a campaign. Haven't said a word, do not plan to myself. This requires finesse, tact and some er, plotting.

Thanks for coming here with your trauma and determination to heal. For every one of 'me' who tells you that you've been helpful, there are probably 10 others browsing forums who think the same thing. When you log in here, in the fins print over to the side it always says " members online 48, guests 448 ", etc. Gives you an idea how many people in pain come here looking for relief.

 

[JSKarma]

My son seems to have just poof- put it behind him as if it were no more than a fall from a ladder or some illness one passes through. I'm not forcing some diagnosis on my son, just have been dealing with this stupid thing for a LOT of years and recognize what's up.

It definitely would help if I could dismiss it as a common cold or a fall from ladder :p

While I don't know the story behind your son's trauma I can definitely understand him putting up a shield. It was hard enough for me to tell my significant other let alone my own mother. Feel free to message me if you like to talk as your situation has peaked my curiosity.

Making that jump from lurking to actually posting is definitely hard as well. I found comfort just reading and now posting has taking that to a new level.