The Albatross
VIP Member
Making some progress with being still if not meditation. I did the rain one day, and did the color green yesterday.
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Happiness Challenge Round 3 - Starting June 1
- Post starter Eleanor
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Changing4Best
VIP Member
I'm going to summarize on the last 2 chapters of THE HAPPINESS ADVANTAGE here as I am hoping that my friend I offered the book to will borrow it and read it.
The 2nd to last chapter is all about Social Connections. He says these are very important to our positive mental and physical well being. He suggests that we invest time in both new connections and old. That is new friends, family you may be out of touch with (but remember as being good people), workmates you don't associate with much, etc. as well as folks you already have a good connection with.
He also says that is is imperative to avoid people who bring you down as much as is possible (but to use positiveness and good emotions in their presence to bring them up, if you must associate with them). That last might be someone like an ex-spouse or a grumpy boss for example.
The last chapter is about THE RIPPLE EFFECT and speaks of how emotions transfer and are mirrored within 2 minutes of being in contact with someone. It also explains that positive emotions are stronger than negative ones, but they must be exercised in order for them to work! He even suggests to "fake it til you make it" if the going gets rough, and that even if you smile as best you can, it is contagious.
He also explains that someone using THE HAPPINESS ADVANTAGE principles who walks into a meeting can raise the emotional level of the whole meeting in short order!
These claims are backed by many scientific studies done by psychologists all over the world. He says that even in cultures where smiling is not common, a smile is contagious none the less, and that happiness and good moods follow it shortly thereafter.
So, everyone, use these tools, exploit them! They can even work on your mother-in-law!!! LOL...
The 2nd to last chapter is all about Social Connections. He says these are very important to our positive mental and physical well being. He suggests that we invest time in both new connections and old. That is new friends, family you may be out of touch with (but remember as being good people), workmates you don't associate with much, etc. as well as folks you already have a good connection with.
He also says that is is imperative to avoid people who bring you down as much as is possible (but to use positiveness and good emotions in their presence to bring them up, if you must associate with them). That last might be someone like an ex-spouse or a grumpy boss for example.
The last chapter is about THE RIPPLE EFFECT and speaks of how emotions transfer and are mirrored within 2 minutes of being in contact with someone. It also explains that positive emotions are stronger than negative ones, but they must be exercised in order for them to work! He even suggests to "fake it til you make it" if the going gets rough, and that even if you smile as best you can, it is contagious.
He also explains that someone using THE HAPPINESS ADVANTAGE principles who walks into a meeting can raise the emotional level of the whole meeting in short order!
These claims are backed by many scientific studies done by psychologists all over the world. He says that even in cultures where smiling is not common, a smile is contagious none the less, and that happiness and good moods follow it shortly thereafter.
So, everyone, use these tools, exploit them! They can even work on your mother-in-law!!! LOL...
The Albatross
VIP Member
10 minute meditation and the exercise component complete today... this time, I was on ice with some music, and I did a mile on the bicycle. Not much but it's another start on these two vexing components.
Whitneys story
Diamond Member
(((((((((((Froggie)))))))))))
Heartfelt sympathy for your loss. Mothers are the hardest, we may never understand their actions. A Dear Friend on the same day! Take all the time you need for grieving.
Take good care of yourself, we are here for you. :hug: Whitney
Heartfelt sympathy for your loss. Mothers are the hardest, we may never understand their actions. A Dear Friend on the same day! Take all the time you need for grieving.
Take good care of yourself, we are here for you. :hug: Whitney
The Albatross
VIP Member
Is this the wrong thread? Froggie didn't post here.
Doubled back to say, running challenges in tandem is tough still for me. Everything is hit and miss, but I'm not beating myself up about it anymore. I just keep restarting the clock. I will get this, I will get this, I will get this and I will be all the better for the endeavor.
Doubled back to say, running challenges in tandem is tough still for me. Everything is hit and miss, but I'm not beating myself up about it anymore. I just keep restarting the clock. I will get this, I will get this, I will get this and I will be all the better for the endeavor.
Whitneys story
Diamond Member
Albatross, this is the one in chit chat! But great post. Focus on what is working for you and breath. :hug: Whitney
Changing4Best
VIP Member
I recall one of us saying they were not sure if they were happy or not, or maybe it was happier. Anyway, I thought this quote might give all of us a heads up on that issue:
"It is so many years before one can believe enough in what one feels even to know what the feeling is."
- William Butler Yeats
"It is so many years before one can believe enough in what one feels even to know what the feeling is."
- William Butler Yeats
Changing4Best
VIP Member
I have thought more upon the above and I would like to express my opinions on this further:
I think there are gradations of happiness and also of unhappiness. If one has been unhappy for a LONG time, one may start, first of all, to feel less unhappy, and then a lesser yet of unhappiness before one starts to feel a bit happy, and then a bit more and so on until one is very happy. Like therapy, this process may take years, but is well worth the effort, and the patience to get where one wants to be and beyond. There may be states of happiness that we can not even yet imagine, that will be possible for us. After years of doing these 5 things as often as possible every day (or at least some of them), I think it is safe to say that all of us will feel much happier than we do now.
Personally, I have found that I am happier, more cooperative, more open to change and more willing to fall flat on my face and get up and start over where I left off too! And it is all very worthwhile!!! Also I have found the support here with TEAM 21 and these Forums to be extrordinarally beneficial, so thanks, folks!
I think there are gradations of happiness and also of unhappiness. If one has been unhappy for a LONG time, one may start, first of all, to feel less unhappy, and then a lesser yet of unhappiness before one starts to feel a bit happy, and then a bit more and so on until one is very happy. Like therapy, this process may take years, but is well worth the effort, and the patience to get where one wants to be and beyond. There may be states of happiness that we can not even yet imagine, that will be possible for us. After years of doing these 5 things as often as possible every day (or at least some of them), I think it is safe to say that all of us will feel much happier than we do now.
Personally, I have found that I am happier, more cooperative, more open to change and more willing to fall flat on my face and get up and start over where I left off too! And it is all very worthwhile!!! Also I have found the support here with TEAM 21 and these Forums to be extrordinarally beneficial, so thanks, folks!
Changing4Best
VIP Member
There is that old saying that "One man's treasure is another's garbage" and I say this in relation to happiness too. One person's dream, pleasure, happy moment, etc., might be another's nightmare.
Here's some examples:
Some folks love to be the entertainer, in the spotlight, getting all the laughs. Other folks hate to be the center of attention and hide out in the corner at parties, etc. even if they get up the courage to go to a party at all.
Some folks love to ride horses while others are afraid of heights!
Some folks feel great when they are generous and giving to their friends, taking them out to eat, buying them gifts etc. Some folks would rather be the one receiving all these things and feel marvelous when they do!
Here's some examples:
Some folks love to be the entertainer, in the spotlight, getting all the laughs. Other folks hate to be the center of attention and hide out in the corner at parties, etc. even if they get up the courage to go to a party at all.
Some folks love to ride horses while others are afraid of heights!
Some folks feel great when they are generous and giving to their friends, taking them out to eat, buying them gifts etc. Some folks would rather be the one receiving all these things and feel marvelous when they do!
Whitneys story
Diamond Member
So true! Can you imagine how boring the universe would be if everyone was the same.
Life is compromise, it is our right to choose what we will accept!
Great insight Sheila :tup:
Life is compromise, it is our right to choose what we will accept!
Great insight Sheila :tup:
Changing4Best
VIP Member
"Under-react to a Problem" by Gretchen Rubin (From her book: HAPPIER AT HOME).
"Although we think we act because of the way we feel, we often feel because of the way we act. Accordingly, one of my Twelve Personal Commandments is to “Act the way I want to feel.”
"Along these lines, I follow the resolution “Under-react to problems”: not to ignore or minimize problems, but just to under-react to them.
"By under-reacting to problems or annoyances, and acting in a serene way, I help myself cultivate a calm attitude.
"I’ve found that under-reacting to little household accidents makes them less irritating, because after all, they’re only as annoying as I allow them to be. No use yelling over spilt nail polish.
"Also, when my husband or children see that I’m reacting calmly, they stay calmer, too. It creates a much nicer atmosphere in our home—especially when something is going wrong.
"Resolve to “Under-react to problems.” Your under-reaction will help make you feel calmer and more in control."
"Although we think we act because of the way we feel, we often feel because of the way we act. Accordingly, one of my Twelve Personal Commandments is to “Act the way I want to feel.”
"Along these lines, I follow the resolution “Under-react to problems”: not to ignore or minimize problems, but just to under-react to them.
"By under-reacting to problems or annoyances, and acting in a serene way, I help myself cultivate a calm attitude.
"I’ve found that under-reacting to little household accidents makes them less irritating, because after all, they’re only as annoying as I allow them to be. No use yelling over spilt nail polish.
"Also, when my husband or children see that I’m reacting calmly, they stay calmer, too. It creates a much nicer atmosphere in our home—especially when something is going wrong.
"Resolve to “Under-react to problems.” Your under-reaction will help make you feel calmer and more in control."
Whitneys story
Diamond Member
Wow Sheila! That is the most outstanding post you have made and thanks so much for sharing! Huge key to happiness! Great job:) Whitney
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