Does Anyone Else Struggle With Impoverishment?

[Changing4Best]

May I ask how you pay your medical bills?

Often on the bill there is a SMALL statement that says if you need financial assistance to call this number: and I do. My last hospital bill was cancelled 100% by calling and sending in a bunch of proofs that I am under the poverty level. There is also a federal law that permits one to pay small amounts in monthly instalments on any bill (as far as I know it covers all bills). This enables you to pay something like $5 or $10 dollars on bills this way. This is what I do. Right now, I am falling behind on my doctors. I keep going for more check-ups and they keep adding the new bills onto the old ones. I am not sure how long this will last before they catch on and maybe do something like send me to a collections agency (or maybe not, who knows...). Collections agencies will also make a payment plan with you, but some of them have minimum payments that you have to meet in order for them to stop calling you and harassing you. Bad news, I know. However if the situation gets desperate, you can turn your phone off when you need to take naps, etc. Just don't forget to turn it back on when you wake up! I am in the USA, I forgot if you live here too.

 

[KP the nut]

How do you handle the crushing shame?

Personally I see no shame in being poor.

 

[JustBe]

I have lived well below the poverty level for my entire adult life, even while working full time and raising my sons. I have learned to simplify my life and expectations. I live in a small but cozy space where the cost of living is low and individuality is valued. Long ago I let go of all that was nonessential and cluttering my life.

I live simply and well and do not crave the trappings of 'success' or social acceptance.

 

[Karen12]

Personally I see no shame in being poor.

Not in merely being poor, no.

 

[Karen12]

This enables you to pay something like $5 or $10 dollars on bills this way. This is what I do. Right now, I am falling behind on my doctors. I keep going for more check-ups and they keep adding the new bills onto the old ones. I am not sure how long this will last before they catch on and maybe do something like send me to a collections agency (or maybe not, who knows...). Collections agencies will also make a payment plan with you, but some of them have minimum payments that you have to meet in order for them to stop calling you and harassing you. Bad news, I know. However if the situation gets desperate, you can turn your phone off when you need to take naps, etc. Just don't forget to turn it back on when you wake up! I am in the USA, I forgot if you live here too.

When you've reached the limit of all the $5 and $10 you can make each month is collections the only other option?

Have you had any doctors drop you as a patient due to unpaid bills?

Can I ask... how do you reconcile who you were with what you've become now?

 

[DharmaGirl]

I used to be a nurse in the hospital. I was charge nurse, and I worked only weekends so I got a huge hourly bonus for that. I made a lot of money. My son and I took really nice vacations, went camping a lot, I bought a house and started fixing it up. I bought a pop-up camper and a van to pull it. I bought a car that I had always wanted. I was well respected in the hospital.

Now I get SSDI. I had to declare bankruptcy, keeping my house. The vehicles are paid for, but when they need fixing I have to save up and find a friend who will do it cheap. The worst part for me was losing the respect of my peers. I became a "psych case" and the gossip got back to me. I thought I would never be able to accept myself. I was so messed up I got SSDI in 4 months for PTSD. I also was later found to be totally and permanently disabled because of my back.

I use some of the programs Sheila talked about, I go to the food bank. In the summer I have a large veggie garden, since you can buy seed with food stamps. I froze a lot of veggies for the year. It took a lot of work in therapy for me to accept that I was a person, then even more work to accept the person I'd become.

One of the ways I learned to accept this was to find things I liked to do. I had a bunch of scrapbook stuff, so I did art journaling, I'm teaching myself bead weaving. This sounds trite, but I get beads cheaply on eBay, and make jewelry good enough to give as gifts. For me, not being able to give nice gifts was horrible! It took almost 3 years to reconcile myself to being poor and not respected, but I am here now. I respect myself.

I make finding things I want and need sort of like a game. I go to yard sales and thrift stores. I am learning how to buy plain clothes at the thrift store and make really funky stuff by adding lace, or other material.

It is really hard to face the fact that you are not able to control your income. I know the lack of respect destroyed me, but finding things I liked to do and doing them helped me learn to respect myself. Daily meditation helped too.

I hope I've answered some of your questions. I hope it's what you meant.

 

[Changing4Best]

@Karen12 You asked: When you've reached the limit of all the $5 and $10 you can make each month is collections the only other option?

I don't know, I've never reached that point yet. But I am getting close. You might want to call the billing departments and ask if they can give you a reduced rate due to your financial situation. Who knows, they might. You have nothing to lose by trying!

You asked: Have you had any doctors drop you as a patient due to unpaid bills?

No.

You asked: Can I ask... how do you reconcile who you were with what you've become now?

It is not important how others view me. If they don't understand or look down upon me, that is between them and God. It is more important what GOD thinks of me. I feel OK in His eyes. Yes, there is more I could do for others, and I will try to find ways to help more of His children, but at least I know I am helping some of them now, which is good. (His children are all those who believe in Him and Jesus and the Holy Spirit. As well, His children are all those who will believe in the future. Also they are all the children on earth that have yet to decide if they want to believe or not. Really, anyone you meet can be His child, so it is important to help others, no matter who they are, including your enemies. One way to help them is to pray for them. There are many other ways too...).

 

[Karen12]

@SheilaKathy - what about yourself? Not how other perceive you. Surely you've changed, yes? How do you reconcile the "before" you with the "now" you, within yourself?

@DharmaGirl - do you maintain relationships with any of your peers from "before?"

 

[anthony]

I believe Are you blessed with more time in this financial condition? What free things can you now enjoy? is a way to put a positive spin on a negative situation. You are focused on the negative, when in fact you should be trying to look at how you can positively help yourself. If you have available time, then what can you use that time for to make your life a little better?

That is the jist of reading that statement in which you replied in anger. Your mind is clouded with negativity, which I believe is the point being made about having free time to improve your life positively.

 

[Karen12]

That is the jist of reading that statement in which you replied in anger.

The assumptions made were the problem. I don't appreciate the derailing of an otherwise productive thread and I'm not going to address this again.

 

[anthony]

Karen, I've been doing this a long time now, and I will say your posts are coming across as hostile and angry. Nobody here is intentionally trying to offend you or such... when in doubt, please just ask for clarification. If you want support, you will get it... but in my experience, members tend to step away from those who become hostile against them when trying to help. Text can be misconstrued in many different ways, and most of it usually has to do with the mood the reader is in. Sure, some is outright content posted. Nobody is perfect... and everyone isn't always 100% proofing their words for some unintended consequence or such.

When in doubt... ask. I think it will avoid the hostility that is coming across. There is a difference between assertiveness and aggressiveness.

 

[Lionheart]

I haven't read this entire thread, only the original post, and that is what I am replying to here....

I just want to say that for my part, I do struggle with "impoverishment", but I do not feel any shame because of it. Who I am has nothing to do with the amount of money I make or the amount of possessions I have...

....except perhaps in the eyes of society in general and in that case, I do not care.

Others should not judge me because of my financial status. I am poor and was a high school drop out, but I went to college, was in the honor society and on the dean's list. I graduated with a degree and received an Honorable discharge from the US Military.

I am a father, grandfather, son and brother. I am intelligent and although I am disabled with PTSD, I was a hard worker previous to becoming disabled.

I spend a lot of time supporting and encouraging my friends and family with their lives and I assist my elderly mother with daily living. I am priceless.

Oscar Wilde once said something to the effect that, "Nowadays people know the price of everything and the value of nothing." I tend to agree.

I hope you find something I have said to be helpful for you.

Peace,
Lion