Would You Ever Lodge A Complaint About A Past Therapist?

[Cool Cat]

I wanted therapy and since I did not have that much money I went to a training institute.

One session I didn't really know what to talk about, and then: right towards the end of the session, he brought up my traumas and we started talking about them. He went really deep, really probing questions. It was terrible, made worse because it was right towards the end of the session - which he ended SO abruptly.

He sends me back me out open at every pore with every old wound and insecurity open.

The following morning the only thing I could do to get out of bed was to self harm. I had never self harmed with full awareness that it was self harm. When I was a kid I did it without knowing what it was. I then went on to develop a crisis-type situation. I was self harming almost every day and was having loads of panic attacks. I had to get medical help twice a week for two months because of how much I was self-harming..

I then went to my current therapist. He has helped me a lot. But to some extent - a huge amount of this stuff should never have happened. I had a crisis, and whether or not it was going to happen anyway, it was almost directly the result of a bad therapist.

I don't want to ruin his career but I want him to know what he did, the effect he had, I want him to know so he can learn and he doesn't go on to 'harm' another person like me.

I was getting steadily worse up to this session and he made no interventions. He knew I had trauma from the consultation and still took me on.

What happens when you lodge a complaint? Is it worth it? Should I?
I somewhat feel bad because he was probably being paid almost nothing to see me, and then me complaining?

 

[zeckster81]

I've had my fair share of bad therapists. I wrote one a letter and explained why her therapy made things worse. She responded with sincere care and appologized. She took my statements and suggestions to heart and I believed learned from them. A few years later she had to do an intake for my husband in my presence at his request. She was much better. I believe a direct letter or phone call would be appropriate especially if this person didn't have much experience. Maybe he'll learn from it.

Either way I think focusing on the good treatment you are now receiving will be more helpful ;).

 

[illusionist]

I remember way back and can honestly say that if I talked five minutes into therapy or five minutes before the end of therapy I still had the same after affects. I agree with what is already suggested, write a letter explaining how you feel.

 

[sun seeker]

It seems odd that the training institute wouldn't have had a system for evaluating their trainees. If the point was for them to get experience, you'd think the trainers would have wanted feedback on the trainees, wouldn't you? Even when I have terminated therapy with a fully trained therapist, there was an evaluation form to be filled out and sent to the employer anonymously.

Could you talk to someone at the institute and tell them you'd like to give feedback on one of their trainees?

I wouldn't worry about ruining his career. He may have improved since, but if he routinely does things like this and everyone is too polite to tell him, he could cause a lot of inadvertent harm and needs to be told. Look at it this way. Interns practice on patients before taking their board exams. During that time, they are closely supervised so any mistakes are quickly rectified. If they were let loose to practice medicine without any supervision and no one ever pointed out to them that, say, they were confusing the spleen with the liver because it might ruin their careers, they wouldn't end up being very good doctors. What happened to you is every bit as important.

 

[Cool Cat]

Hi guys,

Yeah thats probably a good idea to just let him know rather than complain first time around.
The institute did have an evaluation, but you had to pay like a regular appointment (stupid I know)

I told him the next week what was going on and he really did very little. I terminated in the worst kind of way...by phonecall. Yeah I know, very bad form. But I couldn't face another session as it was too destructive.

I almost wonder as well as to what the story was with the intake. The therapist I saw in the consultation was the same one as who gave me the therapy. And prior to consultation, all they knew about me was my name, age and phone number. I think it would be more appropriate for a more senior training staff to do this and then pick one of the students. There was also no paperwork to be filled out either. Despite the fact this place is an accredited course producing accredited psychotherapists. I think they were unprofessional.

It just annoys me as well that the therapy was going absolutely no where and there was no affinity between us and I made this known, that nothing was done. It was no accident what happened in the end where I was more-less re-traumatised.

Then I wonder too, could seeing my old therapist be traumatic in itself? Or am I being OTT.

if he routinely does things like this and everyone is too polite to tell him, he could cause a lot of inadvertent harm and needs to be told.

That's a fair point @sun seeker, I think that's what may have led me to writing this post.

if I talked five minutes into therapy or five minutes before the end of therapy I still had the same after affects.

Yeah actually that's very true, but (and I'm only speaking from the perspective of the good therapy I recieved) if you go into it slowly or early in the session, and it is managed well, and coping strategies are identified it has more hope than the therapist bringing it up last minute rather than the client. I'm just highlighting that I wasn't actually ready to talk about my trauma and he brings it up, and in the last few minutes.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Uhm, a complaint like that isn't going to break his career. He was in training and still learning. If you complain to his governing body, they will look at things from both sides and perhaps at most send this feedback on to him. Its highly unlikely that any sanctions would be handed down given that in the context of trauma therapy, bad reactions aren't uncommon and such sessions are oftentimes triggering to clients. Sending him a letter with feedback is probably your best bet.

 

[sun seeker]

Then I wonder too, could seeing my old therapist be traumatic in itself? Or am I being OTT.

You wouldn't have to see him if you don't want to. I was assuming you were planning on doing this by letter. Personally, I wouldn't be brave enough to go back after all that happened.

If you do decide to write a letter, could you also mention how you felt you tried to bring up how the therapy wasn't going anywhere and nothing was done? In fact, just tell them everything you've told us. Constructively, of course. I think that's what I would do.

 

[Cool Cat]

Personally, I wouldn't be brave enough to go back after all that happened.

Yeah tbh, I find it very hard to visualise going back there, maybe it would be therapeutic but it would almost have to be in a different room or in a non-therapy room.

Maybe it's just my over-active 'super-ego' but I feel like such an a**hole complaining at all. I was always brought up to be extraordinarily grateful for anything I got. I also know that my overactive 'super-ego' is what's holding me back in many ways. I wonder could I meet him with his lecturer? Or if they would do that?

 

[illusionist]

Sorry coolcat, we obviously dealt with things differently. I found that the depth of my pain came out one or two days later after therapy.

 

[Cool Cat]

Ah it's no worries! No need to apologise @richter scale :)
I just feel from experiences I had of disclosing worse traumas with better therapists, that the way the therapist handles the trauma has an effect on how it affects you after the session. It's an unfounded theory backed up only by personal experience

 

[Deleted member 487]

I think that writing a letter is best.

 

[joeylittle]

@Cool Cat, what are you hoping to get out of speaking up about this? Or, what would let you feel like you can move past it?