Therapist Said I Was Resistant

[sun seeker]

I actually chose her because of her approach to attachment issues that she believes can only be solved through relationship.

Hmm... so does my therapist, and yet I can't imagine him making such a blunt statement, especially right off the bat. That does seem a little odd.

I am blessed to have a friend that has stuck by me. So because of this I basically told my T that it was all good because I don't actually have to trust her to make progress.

Ah. You might want to reconsider this. (And that is advice coming from someone who thought the same way at one point... I think it was two therapists ago. I went into therapy resolved not to become emotionally involved in the process, because I do have huge attachment issues and didn't want to trigger myself. It didn't work. Here I am several years later, facing the issues head on. They waited for me to catch up.:))

Having said that, learning to trust is a process. If she's expecting you to trust her completely right from day one, that would raise a red flag for sure.

Wondering though, is it that we hear things differently through a lens of ptsd, other than they were intended?

Yes, very often. That's one reason why communication is so important... learning to take a deep breath before reacting, consider the different possibilities, then ask how something was intended. Good job, you're already doing this by the looks of this thread.

 

[Brenton]

I have finally ventured into the world of therapy. Because of attachment issues I have always feared ge...

I'd have to question how the T came to that conclusion on the first session? That's usually something that becomes obvious as a pattern of resistance shows in session. I had a T diagnose me as a sociopath after two sessions. I am far from that. I care too much and feel too much, and I always feel like I did something wrong even though I know I haven't. Not everyone who works as a T is mentally or emotionally healthy. A good T can really help, and a bad T can kill you inside.
I've always gone with my gut. If the T seems cold or too detached after a few tries, I go elsewhere. Its too important a relationship.
A T can be just another person in your life that hurts you.

 

[Brenton]

Hmm... so does my therapist, and yet I can't imagine him making such a blunt statement, especially ri...

Well said

 

[Thinkbig]

I think, because it took you a lot of guts and personal strength to get into that room with a T in th...

Yes, validation would have been nice. I've always tried to appear strong but it scared me to death. I hate therapists! And you brought up the "exposed" word...Ugg

 

[anthony]

I wouldn't take it personally... most people seeking therapy are hesitant, resistant, initially need to feel out the therapist and whether or not trust can exist or not. It takes time... and honesty from your therapist should be viewed as a positive, not a negative. You really want an honest therapist for PTSD treatment.

I would actually say that a therapist that doesn't piss you off at times treating trauma and PTSD symptoms... then they aren't doing their job to the full potential.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

I would actually say that a therapist that doesn't piss you off at times treating trauma and PTSD symptoms... then they aren't doing their job to the full potential.

Haha, this made me laugh. Only cuz Ive been so mad at my therapist that i was calling him every name in the book and that he wasnt qualified and all sorts of stuff...damn him to challenge the cult.

This is so f*cking true!

Oh edited to add: he just sat there, straight faced and let me get it all out and he picked up where he left off. I was highly pissed and so f*cking serious.

 

[Thinkbig]

I wouldn't take it personally... most people seeking therapy are hesitant, resistant, initially need to feel out the therapist and whether or not trust can exist or not. It takes time... and honesty from your therapist should be viewed as a positive, not a negative. You really want an honest therapist for PTSD treatment.

I would actually say that a therapist that doesn't piss you off at times treating trauma and PTSD symptoms... then they aren't doing their job to the full potential.

Made me laugh too! And so true. I would hate to have someone that didn't challenge me to move out of my comfort zone!

Oh edited to add: he just sat there, straight faced and let me get it all out and he picked up where he left off.

Love this! Sometimes we need to hear it straight! This would be a great way to get out some of this anger :)

 

[Thinkbig]

I'd have to question how the T came to that conclusion on the first session? That's usually something th...

This is so true. And so sad. We go searching for help and we find someone who further wounds us. Its especially hard when we are still trying to find healthy boundaries for self. I tend to get stuck in "child mode" and that is such a vulnerable place.

I'm not quite sure why she said it. But I am sure she had good cause. It just got to me because I have never voluntarily opened up to a T and I HATE to feel analyzed, judged...seen. I have to remind myself that no one can see into the depths of my soul like that.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

I'm not quite sure why she said it.

Ask her!

Love this! Sometimes we need to hear it straight! This would be a great way to get out some of this anger

Im not adovating cussing at your therapist but if you have anger, even at them, let it out, they are used to it! ;)

 

[Powder]

Your T. 's theory that all progress is made via relationship bears up under scrutiny in other areas besides mental health, including education, community, etc.

There is no getting outta that one.

30,000 years ago, hunting in groups is how humans survived an ice age. We've been around longer than that, and we are evolved to need others.

 

[Sideways]

I don't want to jump the gun if this T was just being a bit hasty with her judgments, but "treatment resistant" has a particular meaning in psychospeak, and it could have just been a diagnostic observation that she was drawing from your presentation and clinical history. In paychospeak, "treatment resisitant" is more a statement about the progress to date rather than a comment about whether you're trying hard enough or open to therapeutic assistance.

 

[Leighlee87]

Google the words "Resistance in Therapy". It has a slightly different connotation in psychology. Resistance in the therapy is seen as a normal part of the therapy process, and can actually be a positive sign. Too much resistance can be a bad thing since changes cant be made, too little resistance means there was never a problem to begin with. Resistance generally means that something is striking a nerve, and you have to work through that before you can begin trying to make changes. Ask her to clarify, but also do a little research on the therapy side as it helps a lot.