1001 Ways To Appear Functional (even Though You're Not)

[Ronin]

fake call

Make sure to not be interrupted by a real call, though. Different number.

 

[Deleted member 28403]

Hahaha :) Put phone on airplane mode

 

[Ronin]

Also: Don't fake functionality, it's exhaausting. :wtf:

Eyerolls & talks are like a dying fire. They fade out after time. Nothing to be worried about.

 

[stillstanding2]

But successful faking can prevent even more tedious encounters with clueless busy-bodies, gossips, predators, bullies, and evangelists.

 

[Ellabella44]

have deoderant, toothpaste, and wet wipes / scented lotion and hair ties in a bag in your car. handles all the hygene you may have forgotten and or avoided that morning.

 

[EveHarrington]

@Ellabella44

Too funny. I was JUST about to post the same! My car is full of extra clothing, makeup, food, etc. It's not because I'm especially prepared though. All that stuff was left there over time.

Not old food, just things like water bottles, granola bars----stuff that lasts forever!

 

[EveHarrington]

On the clothing tangent-----

I found this sweet track jacket that is SO comfy. I hunted down the company and it turns out that it's one of those random brands sold in stand alone non chain stores for the most part. Now I have it set as an eBay search. Why am I on hot pursuit of this jacket? Well, no matter how much I wear it, it doesn't stink! It's some kind of miracle fabric, LOL. Sooner or later I'll find another. I just wish it was longer as I'm incredibly long waisted and it hits at my waist. (Not necessarily a good look.) I put up with it for the no wash factor. Everything else in my closet will be filthy but that jacket will have another 5 days left in it LOL.

 

[EveHarrington]

Yep, keep lots of athletic wear & gear around.

Of course I'm active! My entire wardrobe is from Athleta. (No joke, my staple summer clothes are indeed from Athleta. I'm going for that "on the go" look this summer to help me with my functional appearance.)

That tennis racket on the wall? I'm planning on taking lessons. <wink, wink>

The rollerblades in the closet? They haven't been used in years. (But nobody needs to know that!)

Lots of other random active lifestyle stuff strewn around the house----

 

[stillstanding2]

If you generally use a plate, bowl, fork, spoon or knife for snacks and meals by yourself, rinse them with hot water as soon as they are empty and put them in the refrigerator to reuse later. Delays spoilage of any food traces you miss, saves water and soap,and also prevents attracting bugs to your sink. If nosy company arrives, move them to the dishwasher.

 

[stillstanding2]

Realize that "shop" is a four-letter word. Wean yourself from shopping. It is not a sport, but a scam to make you buy things you never heard of at prices higher than their values. If you simply MUST have something, buy it online to avoid local taxes. Or, find online the local store that has the necessity, its price, even its location in the store. Then go buy only that item and leave. Reduces face-time with salespeople, confusing exposure to products you don't know you need, and money and time wasted that you could use at home "meditating."

 

[Changing4Best]

I am suffering from Sciatic Nerve Pain. I sit a little off kilter so as to ease the pain a bit. It does not alleviate it 100%, but any relief is welcome! If I sit totally level and in the usual way one should sit, it hurts more.

 

[stillstanding2]

No reason why you have to sit level. But if you wanted to, you could try putting an extra cushion under the side you lean toward, thereby elevating one side of the seat. That helped my dad with scoliosis. As far as anyone could tell, it was the chair that was crooked and not my dad. A thick billbold in your back pocket can serve the same purpose..