D
Deleted member 43454
Yea I've already scared myself too many f*ckin times to want to do anything but get help right now lol. I don't wanna play no more.
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Another Flare Up
- Thread starter Wilderness medic
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- Thread starter
- #26
Wilderness medic
Bronze Member
Good point. I guess being able to survive is kind of a requirement to be able to eventually work.
Off topic. How many posts until I can post links. Irritating. But then again what isn't... Lol...
Off topic. How many posts until I can post links. Irritating. But then again what isn't... Lol...
Friday
Sponsor
I'm still in the 'trying to keep my name clear' place, too.
Cause my work requires background checks.
One of the county sherrif's who's a pal tipped me off:
Find a trauma therapist who is willing to code it as divorce counseling.
Cause almost everyone is divorced, and there are 10,000 jokes to be made about your ex driving you crazy.
Private counseling, paid outta pockets, peer counseling, 12step, here (cough cough)!... There's ways around leaving paper trails.
Cause my work requires background checks.
One of the county sherrif's who's a pal tipped me off:
Find a trauma therapist who is willing to code it as divorce counseling.
Cause almost everyone is divorced, and there are 10,000 jokes to be made about your ex driving you crazy.
Private counseling, paid outta pockets, peer counseling, 12step, here (cough cough)!... There's ways around leaving paper trails.
- Thread starter
- #28
Wilderness medic
Bronze Member
Good idea, thank you. I guess since the va is a huge stressor anyway I might as well try something that could actually work, a hopefully not reflect badly.
- Thread starter
- #29
Wilderness medic
Bronze Member
Was forced into a 12 step and hated it. Not my thing. Hearing civilians whine about how bad the pot they smoked once a week was made me, wait for it.... Angry...
Friday
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How's his for hilarious; I was forced into treatment... After about a week (in a 30-60 day program that's notorious for saying a 6yo who has only ever had a lolly twice a year has a candy addiction for f*cks sake) they said:
Congratulations! You don't need to be here! You need PTSD counseling. Bad.
And showed me the door.
Ha. Do not.
This was about 15 years ago.
I've come to believe that perhaps they were on to something ;)
Congratulations! You don't need to be here! You need PTSD counseling. Bad.
And showed me the door.
Ha. Do not.
This was about 15 years ago.
I've come to believe that perhaps they were on to something ;)
- Thread starter
- #31
Wilderness medic
Bronze Member
Out. Standing.
My favorite part was in the main forces treatment program being forced to watch a video showin pictures of dead children/people from drugs/ murders etc. when asked how it made me feel by th shitbag counselor I made a joke to ease myself from flipping.
I was kicked out of the program and accused of being high for making a funny. I was not even close to getting high. At all.
So being the kind gentleman I am I kicked my way into the coordinators office without welcome and went off.
They made a special arrangement to sign me off with treatment from the va.
No better. But at least they weren't aggravating ptsd.
My favorite part was in the main forces treatment program being forced to watch a video showin pictures of dead children/people from drugs/ murders etc. when asked how it made me feel by th shitbag counselor I made a joke to ease myself from flipping.
I was kicked out of the program and accused of being high for making a funny. I was not even close to getting high. At all.
So being the kind gentleman I am I kicked my way into the coordinators office without welcome and went off.
They made a special arrangement to sign me off with treatment from the va.
No better. But at least they weren't aggravating ptsd.
- Thread starter
- #32
Wilderness medic
Bronze Member
Or driving an hour to do 12 hour training shifts in an ER, driving 2 hours to a bs treatment program for an hour, driving 2 hours home, having to shower and do laundry and repeat. Then getting bitched at for being tired in meeting. And asked why I can't admit I do drugs. Mother f*cker I just handled heavy narcotics in the hospital before I came here I don't do drugs. I have no desire for that shit and get regularly tested.
Sorry. Now I'm just whining.
Sorry. Now I'm just whining.
D
Deleted member 43454
No need to apologize man. It's good to vent here.
Friday
Sponsor
Also, back to your original Q about PTSD v IED ...
A lot of diagnosis in the DSM-V share symptoms.
Just because explosive rage can be a symptom of PTSD, doesn't mean you have every other Dx that also has explosive rage & in it. Although it doesn't exclude co-occurring disorders.
Like a fever of 104 can be attached to a lot of different illnesses, or blown pupils can be illness, trauma, or drugs... Or you can pick someone up in hypoglycemic shock, who has ALSO knocked themselves hard enough to be unconscious in a car wreck. Course, that one, the depressed fracture on her noggin gets the blame off the bat, when it was probably secondary. Neurology/psychology isn't all that different from the rest of medicine.
There's usually a difference, even in shared symptomology, though. Unlike a fevers a fever, in psych something can look the same, but not just have a different cause, but a different feel to it.
Like I'm ADHD. My peeps tend to be super argumentative/contrary. But we're not ODD (oppositional defiant disorder, who argue with every damn thing). Tell someone with ODD that the sky is blue, and they'll say no it isn't... just to say no. Tell someone with ADHD the sky is blue, and they might say "no" too, but if you press them you'll end up with a whole Bubba Gump Shrimp list of all the times when the sky is not blue (at night, dawn, sunset, in storms, cloud cover, smoke cover, on Jupiter, in black and white movies, if all the water got sucked out kill other color spectrum, if, if, if, if, if etc.). The ODD brain locks onto the inverse and shuts everything else out. The ADHD brain starts spinning out looking for all the possible exceptions. Even though our moths might say the same thing / it looks the same at first glance.
So now I'm co-occurring ADHD + PTSD. Both can make the other worse, hide symptoms, help out, or have no effect whatsoever. Who knows, maybe you're IED + PTSD. But ADHD, Bipolar Disorder, Aspies, Sensory Processing Disorder, and a half a dozen other disorders off the top of my head all come along with periodic meltdowns.
A lot of diagnosis in the DSM-V share symptoms.
Just because explosive rage can be a symptom of PTSD, doesn't mean you have every other Dx that also has explosive rage & in it. Although it doesn't exclude co-occurring disorders.
Like a fever of 104 can be attached to a lot of different illnesses, or blown pupils can be illness, trauma, or drugs... Or you can pick someone up in hypoglycemic shock, who has ALSO knocked themselves hard enough to be unconscious in a car wreck. Course, that one, the depressed fracture on her noggin gets the blame off the bat, when it was probably secondary. Neurology/psychology isn't all that different from the rest of medicine.
There's usually a difference, even in shared symptomology, though. Unlike a fevers a fever, in psych something can look the same, but not just have a different cause, but a different feel to it.
Like I'm ADHD. My peeps tend to be super argumentative/contrary. But we're not ODD (oppositional defiant disorder, who argue with every damn thing). Tell someone with ODD that the sky is blue, and they'll say no it isn't... just to say no. Tell someone with ADHD the sky is blue, and they might say "no" too, but if you press them you'll end up with a whole Bubba Gump Shrimp list of all the times when the sky is not blue (at night, dawn, sunset, in storms, cloud cover, smoke cover, on Jupiter, in black and white movies, if all the water got sucked out kill other color spectrum, if, if, if, if, if etc.). The ODD brain locks onto the inverse and shuts everything else out. The ADHD brain starts spinning out looking for all the possible exceptions. Even though our moths might say the same thing / it looks the same at first glance.
So now I'm co-occurring ADHD + PTSD. Both can make the other worse, hide symptoms, help out, or have no effect whatsoever. Who knows, maybe you're IED + PTSD. But ADHD, Bipolar Disorder, Aspies, Sensory Processing Disorder, and a half a dozen other disorders off the top of my head all come along with periodic meltdowns.
Last edited by a moderator:
Good morning WM and welcome to the forum.
This is just my opinion and opinions are like arseholes, everyone has one.
After reading all that I think you just have PTSD, plain and simple. That was your original question wasn't it. And the only thing you can do for it is therapy and if the symptoms are getting out of hand too much you can try medication.
Red offered that advice and you shut him down. How about 'Thanks for the advice mate'!!!!
You can't possibly have been to every therapist around there, so you have no idea if any would work for you, sometimes you have to give it time.
As for medication, well having been on here for nearly five years now I have seen many a veteran deny themselves using medication for your exact reasons, I was one of them. But when you hit rock bottom and can't see any way out you will try anything. It's like people who take medication for a week and don't see any benefit. Medication is only there to soften the edges so you can do the therapy to fix the problem.
So, the answer to your question is no. In my opinion I don't think you have IED.
There are a lot of things like Bipolar,IED, and other ailments whose symptoms sound so familiar, but in the end PTSD is the culprit.
You see PTSD is just an umbrella term used to encompass so many things. Just look at Depression, Anxiety, and Stress. They will be diagnosed separately, but they come hand in hand with PTSD, it's only their severity which changes.
Always remember that the people on here all have PTSD and volunteer their answers to you. When I was in a very dark place some of the guys and gals that used to be on here saved me.
Take a long look at yourself and ask the question. "What am I willing to do to live a better life, will I do whatever it takes"
This is just my opinion and opinions are like arseholes, everyone has one.
After reading all that I think you just have PTSD, plain and simple. That was your original question wasn't it. And the only thing you can do for it is therapy and if the symptoms are getting out of hand too much you can try medication.
Red offered that advice and you shut him down. How about 'Thanks for the advice mate'!!!!
You can't possibly have been to every therapist around there, so you have no idea if any would work for you, sometimes you have to give it time.
As for medication, well having been on here for nearly five years now I have seen many a veteran deny themselves using medication for your exact reasons, I was one of them. But when you hit rock bottom and can't see any way out you will try anything. It's like people who take medication for a week and don't see any benefit. Medication is only there to soften the edges so you can do the therapy to fix the problem.
So, the answer to your question is no. In my opinion I don't think you have IED.
There are a lot of things like Bipolar,IED, and other ailments whose symptoms sound so familiar, but in the end PTSD is the culprit.
You see PTSD is just an umbrella term used to encompass so many things. Just look at Depression, Anxiety, and Stress. They will be diagnosed separately, but they come hand in hand with PTSD, it's only their severity which changes.
Always remember that the people on here all have PTSD and volunteer their answers to you. When I was in a very dark place some of the guys and gals that used to be on here saved me.
Take a long look at yourself and ask the question. "What am I willing to do to live a better life, will I do whatever it takes"
reddevil1111
Diamond Member
Thanks for that Jimmy.
Its like the discussion on guns. It shows where a person is on the idea of getting some solutions to the problems. I recall holding onto the guns and thinking I would never let go of them. I had a real hard time with that.
It comes off a bit like recovery for booze/drugs I think. You will be ready someday. It might be real late in the game for you but everyone at some point becomes willing to do what it takes.
A lot of guys come on here for a few days and drift away not wanting to accept the work its going to take.
There is no magic pill, no one can cure you with a diet, or a special bracelet or whatever. its going to take a lot of personal effort and commitment to get results.
Lying to protect your guns is not going to help. Lots of guys have this issue. But how do you expect to make it if you need help and the guns are keeping you from it?
Same with a job. It may suck a lot but the job might change. Or it might become a bit different. If you are broken and something else is influencing your ability to get the problem fixed, is that not part of the problem then? It becomes a crutch you can grasp and use to ward off the tough times. Its an excuse not to get help.
And intense therapy makes the PTSD even worse. But at some point your going to need to do it brother. And in time...it might be 1-3 or even more years but in time it will get better. There is a better life. Not a cure by any means but there is way to live with all of this.
WM I didn't write this just for you. I wrote it with the hopes that others will see it and think about it as well. Don't take it all to heart, I am not judging. I am seriously just trying to help. So is Jimmy. He is a solid guy.
Its like the discussion on guns. It shows where a person is on the idea of getting some solutions to the problems. I recall holding onto the guns and thinking I would never let go of them. I had a real hard time with that.
It comes off a bit like recovery for booze/drugs I think. You will be ready someday. It might be real late in the game for you but everyone at some point becomes willing to do what it takes.
A lot of guys come on here for a few days and drift away not wanting to accept the work its going to take.
There is no magic pill, no one can cure you with a diet, or a special bracelet or whatever. its going to take a lot of personal effort and commitment to get results.
Lying to protect your guns is not going to help. Lots of guys have this issue. But how do you expect to make it if you need help and the guns are keeping you from it?
Same with a job. It may suck a lot but the job might change. Or it might become a bit different. If you are broken and something else is influencing your ability to get the problem fixed, is that not part of the problem then? It becomes a crutch you can grasp and use to ward off the tough times. Its an excuse not to get help.
And intense therapy makes the PTSD even worse. But at some point your going to need to do it brother. And in time...it might be 1-3 or even more years but in time it will get better. There is a better life. Not a cure by any means but there is way to live with all of this.
WM I didn't write this just for you. I wrote it with the hopes that others will see it and think about it as well. Don't take it all to heart, I am not judging. I am seriously just trying to help. So is Jimmy. He is a solid guy.
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