Anxiety Over People In My House

[macbeth]

I wont go into details, however, many of my traumatic events often resulted in people turning up at my house unexpectedly, including police, ambulance, etc. People coming to my house, especially if I don't know they're coming, is extremely stressful for me.

As some of you may know I live in a rented house that the owner is getting ready for sale. Although it is not officially on the market, he and his wife are fixing things around the place for the purposes of selling. I knew they were coming but they turned up more than an hour early so I didn't have the support of my husband. I kept having to retreat to my study to hide the shaking and to cry as I was so overwhelmed with anxiety.

I was wondering if others have a hard time if people come into their homes?

 

[Sammyiam]

Hi Macbeth,

I get very stressed if I know someone is coming and they turn up early, I always try to know when someone is coming.

I just never feel like I'm ok if someone just turns up I don't know what it is but I just don't handle it at all well.

I always get very stressed and think that I'm not good enough and my house isn't good enough

 

[fly away home]

You're certainly not alone with this.

I asked my mother to text before she comes and had to tell everyone to contact me first and don't just turn up.

Nobody gets it and I've copped a lot of flack for it from my ex's family and mine but I'd rather cop flack than have people turn up unannounced.

It's only because I get such a fright when someone knocks or worse just walks into my house. It's highly unsettling. So I totally empathize with what is happening for you. I hope things sort themselves out soon so you can stay in your house with no more unexpected visits.

 

[digger]

I get really stressed by people in my house. Even friends, but moreso with workmen etc people getting on and doing their own thing. I don't what to do with myself while they are here. I spend the whole time on edge. I get massively anxious before they come and take ages to settle after!

Today my son has a mate coming over for a bit, even that really unsettles me

 

[fly away home]

So true @digger I hadn't really thought about it but it is very uncomfortable having people, even good friends visit. I'm never relaxed. But it's so normal to never feel relaxed that I hadn't thought that visitors might be adding to the stress. In retrospect I can see it clearly does not come easily with me like it seems to with other people.

 

[macbeth]

@digger I feel that way too when my kids have friends over. @fly away home I am usually on edge also. I have a startled response to all sudden noises but the doorbell or a knock at the door are harder to deal with.

 

[digger]

. I have a startled response to all sudden noises but the doorbell or a knock at the door are harder to deal with.

I can see people come in my gate, walk up the path, and still jump out my skin when they actually knock the door!!:bag::D

 

[Tanishq]

Sometimes I do startle, I can relate to that.

macbeth it sounds you don't like crowdy places or all of sudden gatherings. For some reason, you feel unprepared for that. I also don't like when some people come at this place without letting us know. Their actions makes me think they think people's houses are like restaurant. You can go in whenever you want and you can go out whenever you want. Not good though. They should let know the host that they are coming to see in the least. Information you know. That would be respectful and considering thing to do.

 

[risingsun]

I was wondering if others have a hard time if people come into their homes?

Oh my God, Yes! We are renters and the people we rent from live next door. They are constantly in the yard, constantly wanting to fix things around the place and they have wanted to come in on many occasions unannounced. Sometimes, they have work done on the place without any advanced notice. We want to move so bad.

Before we were at this place, we rented from another place. We went through what you did; the selling of the home. We had to deal with them showing the place, coming on the property etc.

I can highly empathize with you, especially since they are preparing to come in tomorrow to fix something. I hate it. I'm having high anxiety over this as well.

INVASION OF PRIVACY!

Sorry you are experiencing this as well. Rising Sun.