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Anyone Else Find It Hard To Cry In Therapy?

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bright future28

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So iv noticed something in therapy whenever im talking about things that are deeply upsetting to me i feel like i want to cry and i can feel it coming but it just wont come out!! Anyone else feel like this? Maybe its got to do with hiding things inside for so long its hard to let it out. When i talk to my mum or partner about things it comes out easily but when im talking to my therapist its almost like im talking as if these things have happended to someone else. also does anyone else get super hungry after councelling? I could literally eat a horse when i get back!
 
Crying in therapy comes with trust, feeling safe and letting go of control. It took me years, now I can't stop crying, I wish there was a way to allow the emotions, so I could process my trauma, but without needing to cry. I either cry or numb, it would be nice to be somewhere in between.
 
thanks for your replies guys. when i first started i cryed alot now its so hard to let it out. I went to therapy yesterday and ever since iv been feeling really down :( its strange because the week before i felt so happy after getting things off are chest but i guess im going to be feeling a whole mix of emotions.
 
Last year in therapy I cried like a baby and wasn't offered a tissue till the end of the session.. It has put me off crying. I hold it all in now, actually I don't even cry alone, I think I'm totally numb. I think it's cathartic? to let it all out but I struggle to do that.
 
I'm the same as @watundah - I haven't cried in therapy and if I feel it sneaking up on me (first sign is usually my voice wobbling!) my instinct is to pause and compose myself.

It's odd though because a few weeks ago, I really felt on the cusp of full on panic and/or floods of tears all the time - I felt hideous and like I was having a real meltdown. And then I went to therapy expecting a real tsunami of a session - was really braced for breaking down and sobbing my heart out and was telling myself beforehand that if that's what happened, that was ok and I should just allow myself to go with it... Got in her room....nothing...! Felt fully present, fully completely calm and composed and those feelings I'd been having for weeks just felt a million miles away. And then I left her room and they all came rushing back!

Something strange happens to me when I get in her room. It's frustrating. And confusing...
 
those feelings I'd been having for weeks just felt a million miles away. And then I left her room and they all came rushing back!

Something strange happens to me when I get in her room. It's frustrating. And confusing...

I've had this happen sooo many times. Makes me wonder if i I'm just faking the whole thing. But sometimes even just a couple of hours later, I'm barely functional again, crashing to new lows, if for no other reason than the extreme loneliness of not being able to bring this into relationship.
 
I so feel the same. I want to cry there. I cannot much if any in real life either. It makes me feel insane. I know it is safe to cry. I, by all rights, want to cry.... it just like others said...it is like right there ready to flood and....it. just. Won't. Flow. It frustrates me. Then when I get home. It's like I must write to capture how I feel. To deal with things that come to my mind. It has to occur. I have no desire to cry butbut still upset I cannot cry in therapy. That is the place only place! I feel safe...so why cannot I not do it there in the place I am free to totally be me.

I've been wondering this myself and glad....for selfish reasons I am not alone in this occurring.

I however cannot cry in front of anyone. There is no one I trust that much. But that's my life. Anyway @bright future28 I hope you are able to continue to do and work through and heal in the way that is perfect for you!
 
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