Anyone Have Trouble Using The Phone?

[whirleygurl]

Interesting. While I use the phone at work and am just fine, I am not a phone gabber at home. I always feel a little anxiety even when I know the person who is calling or am expecting the call. Very few people have my phone number. I never answer it if I don't recognize the phone number.

The quieter my surroundings are, the better.

Thank goodness for answering machines, caller i.d., texting and email.

 

[Privateer]

I loathe telephones. I always have, but they're a major part of my job which only makes me like them less. Nobody ever really phones me at work unless something horrible has happened or is going to happen.

I find it particularly troubling to listening to parents telling me their kid is drowning and things like that. We've had a few incidents of that sort and the people's voices won't leave me alone.

I really enjoy talking on the radio, oddly enough. Radio conversations are far more structured, I suppose, and the prowords help keep things nice and clear.

 

[JustBe]

For me the uncomfortable thing about talking on the phone is the social interaction. I get lost and have a difficult time holding up my end of the conversation. I also have great difficulty ending the conversation. I'm always second guessing myself and sure that I will somehow offend.

Great thread. Really opened my eyes. I thought my issues with the phone were just another example of my inadequacy socially and a character flaw.

 

[Privateer]

I thought my issues with the phone were just another example of my inadequacy socially and a character flaw.

No. Phones are evil. True story.

 

[Traumagirl]

Tootilla, I hate talk radio. I thought it was just me.

 

[zymogram]

I can make appointments at home and call my son and daughter. Period. I am terrified to even call my brothers or my friends. I have never understood why I am this way. I like the input about not being able to see facial expressions. Now that I think about it, I do get panicky talking to my kids. Not always, but I read a lot into what is said or not said.

 

[DazedandAbused]

It's a bit of a PTSD stressors for me, fearing I would say something I shouldn't (Mom was very paranoid) and I would get yelled at or beaten as a kid because of her fears.

For calling out I've gotten better over the years by using the phone for things I feel confident in, like information related to hobbies or something I feel strongly about. For me, I would concentrate on the subject I was interested as much as possible. After a while I became a little more desensitized. I still have troubles but not as bad. So kdblossom, try doing simple calls that have subject matters that you have confidence in to build up successes.

I'm really glad I have caller ID and answering machines. PTSD stressors are worse for me on incoming calls as I fear I'm going to be told I'm bad and get yelled at for something I did wrong, or worse, be triggered by Mom if she calls!

 

[SweetPeaandSunBird]

kdblossom, I'm so glad people are still currently responding to this thread, and, thank you for starting it in the first place. Repeat: thank you.

I, too, use an answering machine and never pick up on the call (unless it's my boyfriend who has a soothing voice:inlove: ). It takes me sometimes weeks to finally make a call to those who are not my boyfriend. For me, not having the opportunity to see/analyze body language is key.

Tips that I use:
What helps me is to make a fresh cup of something soothing to drink before dialing (I also light a cig, but, I don't recommend that because-because). I also scribble out what I need to say (like others have suggested).
During the conversation, I doodle to also calm me down.

Again, thanks to this forum and all who share their ideas, concerns, stories, I have another way to remind myself that I am, that we are "normal" considering how our nervous systems and brains tried to fend off the abnormal experiences our perpetrators forced upon us.

Repeat: thank you, kdblossom.

 

[Philippa]

I think it was a cruel joke that I ended up doing telephone surveys for a living. For 4 hours a night I sit and dial, constantly, strangers numbers, and am forced to talk to people I don't know and repeat the same words over and over again...until insanity ensues.

I must be a masochist to have taken this job. If it weren't for the pay being so good and the hours so flexible, and the atmosphere quite relaxed and being allowed to doodle while i work, I would not be there.

I do find it a strange irony that I would end up in this job though, given my hatred for phones and computers.

 

[Britt.f7]

I'm glad I came across this forum.

I've noticed, as my depression worsened, I have become even less likely to talk on the phone. It doesn't matter if it is friend, family, whoever. I do not want to talk on the phone. Takes me awhile to make doctors appointments or talk to the doctors because of it. I also, rarely, check messages.

Monster 1977, it's only been recently, but I've stopped checking my mail too. My husband thinks it is odd, because I use to always run to get it. Not anymore.

 

[Tootilla]

Yeah I stopped checking my mail too. And the messages...I just delete them. I don't need any bad news I guess. That's why I stopped watching TV.

 

[SadDreamer]

I have a huge problem with the phone. It confuses and pisses off most of my friends and family. I don't recall anything with my trauma related to a phone, so I have no idea why I have such a hard time answering calls & texts. I just hate it. I have no desire to constantly be texting and calling people back. Even though I know I should and I feel bad about it. I hate the feeling of having to answer the phone. Like right now, I have 16 unread texts, and 146 unheard voicemail's on my cell phone.... My friends get mad at me all the time saying that I am a bitch because I never call or text them back. But it really has nothing to do with them. I just hate it. I don't know what's wrong with me and why I suck at calling, texting, and emailing people. I know I have to do it, especially since I am trying to start my own business. I don't know why I have this problem. I never used to do this before PTSD.