Other Aphasia... and also mood changes

[Mashed Potatoes]

I was feeling fine and now I'm not.
I felt positive for days
Now I have extreme sadness
I can't figure out why
It's snowing outside
I went to the store
I was singing Everything is Beautiful
It's not a real song, I was literally just singing it at the snow
Earlier I was trying to say 'prisoner' about a show I was watching
I said 'courstuner' or something...
I can't spell it since it isn't a word
I started doing things like this maybe a few months back
About 2 years ago I started stuttering on and off
Then I was saying weird words
My friend said I was talking in tonuges (some religious thing)
But I wasn't
I knew what I wanted to say
But the words came out non sensical
I try harder now to slow down and try
I say sometimes, real words but they aren't the ones I was looking for
Sometimes I get to the one I was trying to say
Sometimes I don't
Sometimes I just say words that are 1/2 of it and some nonsensical other half
It frustrates me
I think that's what happened with my mood
Maybe I just started thinking about it more
Maybe it's the gray sky and snow out my window
I just don't know...

Sometimes I guess I just feel so dang confused about what is happening to me...

possible background that may or may not be leading to this:
PTSD
depression
anxiety / panic attacks
8 concussions (ABI)
Since my last one, I stopped being able to do my job, forget things, and can never be alone
The stuttering started happening in 2014. I fell and broke my ankle in 3 places and banged my already fragile head and neck into the ground when I fell.

 

[ladee]

That has to be so frustrating for you. I take care of a lady who had a stroke and she has aphasia.
I am with her enough to know what she is trying to say. She can even laugh at herself sometimes.
But I see the frustration and embarrasment she feels too.
My heart hurts for you to be around people who just don't get how painful it is for you.
Are you getting Any kind of speech therapy?
That is a lot of concussions. I hope you can at least get a Dr to tell you if it will get better or not.
Sending gentle hugs for being in a world where people just won't take the time to be understanding.

 

[Deleted member 541]

I'm sorry. Concussions are way more serious than most people realize. I had a couple as a child, but back then it wasn't considered a big thing, just had to make sure you didn't sleep and kept you awake. I just suffered one recently and was having some issues. Very minor compared to yours.

The brain has a way of rewiring itself, so all hope it's not lost. I wish you well....

 

[Mashed Potatoes]

That has to be so frustrating for you. I take care of a lady who had a stroke and she has aphasia.
I am w...

hi @ladee I'm not in any kind of therapy. After the last concussion when I couldn't do my job anymore, they said I should file for disability. So I went from full benefits and 45,k a year to 17,k a year and being on medicare. I can't afford anything because of debt accumlated after I couldn't make as much, I already had credit card debt so I pay the minimums. there's not much left over so that's not something I can do. the last dr I saw was a neurologist. He said that after my last concussion, I was going thru the post concussive for a year that time. He said that I can't do things now like jump (i used to dance) but I get headaches easily. I don't know if the aphasia comes later because I didn't have that and the stuttering, those didn't start until I broke my ankle and fell on the ground that'st the Time I hit my neck / head. The ER only treated my fracture and since I don't have good insurance I wasn't able to get anything else checked out without paying co insurances / co payments.

 

[ladee]

Are how Medicare can help you. Call them ,tell them the situation and see what they can do. And there are T's that take Medicare.
Try not to get discouraged. You family DR can order Speech therapy and Occupational therapy and Medicare pays for it.
You may have a small copay. But you can also explain your situation and pay it out.
Please let me know if you checked on these things and if you can get some help.
There has to be some help somewhere. Don't give up!

 

[Cannottakethis]

I have problems with my words as well. I'll be mid sentence and cannot find the word for the life of me. Sometimes I use "thing/thingy" but most of the time I stop and start stammering because I can't find the word. And I get angry. I was an English major and used to get paid a lot of money to talk to people in my profession and now I'm afraid to talk for fear of embarrassing myself. My T said it's common with PTSD especially under stress. I try to stop and take a deep breath when it happens to see if the pause will bring the word to me.
I'm sorry @Mashed Potatoes that you're going through this. I know how it feels and I wish I could help.

 

[Mashed Potatoes]

I have problems with my words as well. I'll be mid sentence and cannot find the word for the life of me....

I love the words THING and THINGY! My two bestest friends :) I am sorry that you go through it too. I do find it is more when I'm under stress or excited about something. That's something I didn't realize til you said that.

 

[Mashed Potatoes]

Are how Medicare can help you. Call them ,tell them the situation and see what they can do. And there are...

I'm going to look into it but we really have to pay off a few credit cards first to free up copay money. Right now its a choice between gas and groceries so it doesn't leave much. I really screwed myself getting a car. I had a truck that had 200k miles on it, but I owned it. I somehow decided I needed a car, it's a great car and all and has 4wd for the winters here in upstate ny but geez I didn't quite think it out and now am paying 408/mo for it. I swear people like me shouldn't be able to sign contracts!!!

 

[ladee]

I think you can work out a payment plan..but wouldn't hurt to check it out. When you can afford it you will have the info..
I know they let us sign contracts and have a drivers license..scary huh!!

 

[Mashed Potatoes]

I think you can work out a payment plan..but wouldn't hurt to check it out. When you can afford it you wi...

right!!! my husband has never had a license so I do all the driving but I'm never ever out alone. Lord knows I would drive by my house, order food and leave without getting it, pump gas into the car instead of the tank! LORD only Knows :)

 

[ladee]

:nailbiting: I wish I didn't relate...but I do!:hug: