D
Deleted member 29889
what a surprise, huh? LOL
I have a new boyfriend and I really like him a lot.
Problem is, he loves going to groups for some kind of free therapy and to "establish human connections" with strangers and to "live a more authentic and honest life."
Groups frighten me. No, the very thought feels traumatizing. I've been to two of them with him. He has no clue as to what I'm experiencing. I'm scared if I didn't go to these groups with him then the relationship will be diminished. He pretty much told me that he thinks it will be. At least he is willing to read a book I recommended about PTSD. His group fetish seems to diminish the fact that I have been in therapy for over five years and that I also see a psychiatrist (7 years) who specializes in treating PTSD and is a combat veteran. Both my doctor and my therapist understand.
I feel deeply hurt after the conversation I had with my boyfriend last night. When I feel like I didn't want to talk about something, he pushes and prods me to talk about something uncomfortable. Last night I asked him if he took pleasure in hurting me. He doesn't want to believe that what I live with cannot be fixed by going to self-help groups or Mark Groups. He has no clue that strangers are all potential predators to me.
He has apparently never met a sociopath.
He believes the world is a friendly and loving place.
He's never put human corpses in black body bags.
He's never sought safety in a domestic violence shelter.
He's never been threatened with death by a group of strangers.
I suppose I should confront him about the implication that because I do not want to disclose personal and painful information in group settings that I am not interested in "personal growth," and "forming deep and authentic human connections."
He has a copy of a book I recommended about PTSD. He says he wants to understand. Maybe he means it. I'm afraid he won't understand.
I'm afraid of the relationship being harmed. I'm afraid of getting dumped. I'm afraid I'm not good enough. I'm afraid I'm not the kind of girl he wants/needs. Maybe he wants someone who would like to do all the same things he likes to do. Maybe he needs someone to view the world the same way that he does.
He gives the impression that he thinks going to groups is going to flip a switch inside my brain that will cure me of PTSD, or at least cure me of my nightmares. He asked me the other night if a deeply spiritual and mystical experience could possibly flip the switch and remove the PTSD.
I wonder if I could just fake it.
I have a new boyfriend and I really like him a lot.
Problem is, he loves going to groups for some kind of free therapy and to "establish human connections" with strangers and to "live a more authentic and honest life."
Groups frighten me. No, the very thought feels traumatizing. I've been to two of them with him. He has no clue as to what I'm experiencing. I'm scared if I didn't go to these groups with him then the relationship will be diminished. He pretty much told me that he thinks it will be. At least he is willing to read a book I recommended about PTSD. His group fetish seems to diminish the fact that I have been in therapy for over five years and that I also see a psychiatrist (7 years) who specializes in treating PTSD and is a combat veteran. Both my doctor and my therapist understand.
I feel deeply hurt after the conversation I had with my boyfriend last night. When I feel like I didn't want to talk about something, he pushes and prods me to talk about something uncomfortable. Last night I asked him if he took pleasure in hurting me. He doesn't want to believe that what I live with cannot be fixed by going to self-help groups or Mark Groups. He has no clue that strangers are all potential predators to me.
He has apparently never met a sociopath.
He believes the world is a friendly and loving place.
He's never put human corpses in black body bags.
He's never sought safety in a domestic violence shelter.
He's never been threatened with death by a group of strangers.
I suppose I should confront him about the implication that because I do not want to disclose personal and painful information in group settings that I am not interested in "personal growth," and "forming deep and authentic human connections."
He has a copy of a book I recommended about PTSD. He says he wants to understand. Maybe he means it. I'm afraid he won't understand.
I'm afraid of the relationship being harmed. I'm afraid of getting dumped. I'm afraid I'm not good enough. I'm afraid I'm not the kind of girl he wants/needs. Maybe he wants someone who would like to do all the same things he likes to do. Maybe he needs someone to view the world the same way that he does.
He gives the impression that he thinks going to groups is going to flip a switch inside my brain that will cure me of PTSD, or at least cure me of my nightmares. He asked me the other night if a deeply spiritual and mystical experience could possibly flip the switch and remove the PTSD.
I wonder if I could just fake it.
