Correcting yourself

[LucyLou]

Had session with therapist this morning and I mentioned something but after I finished with her, I realised I was wrong. I mentioned something and said it was 3/4 years ago, when actually it was only 1.5 years ago. My perception of time was way off. So I've emailed her to correct myself I know this seems strange but if I don't correct myself straight away, I'm going to keep thinking on it....like I haven't been accurate. I swear, I exhaust myself....the way my head gets sometimes. Anyone else this way?

 

[Rose White]

Yes, often after a session I would desperately want to correct something I said or add a part I forgot. It’s a kind of compulsion. My T said that being able to sit with it and journal what it was that came up and process outside of session (then bring what I learned to session) was part of the work. Often what happens in session is just a catalyst for the work that goes on outside of session. Not saying it’s wrong to reach out to her—just that it might happen more frequently as you get into the work with her.

 

[Friday]

Yep, yep.

The more symptomatic I am the more compulsively honest I get, as well as the less able I am to view time as linear. My perception of time skews hard, in a major way.

In my own life? I’ve learned to pay attention to “6mo”. Whenever I think/say something was 6mo ago? Or lasted 6mo? I’ve learned to check a calendar. Because 6mo could be yesterday or 20 years ago. It’s my own personal canary in a coal mine that my brain is supplying a number to fill a gap.

I’m dead serious about the compulsion bit. It feels as if it’s as urgent/necessary as life or death. No idea why. Just that it happens.

 

[arfie]

another me-too. i am recovering from trauma induced amnesia and if i don't keep my timelines straight, the self-gaslighting goes on indefinitely.

 

[Lost in the Woods]

Oh boy, I relate. I often misunderstand things and when I realize it I am quick to make the correction, particularly if it involves a disagreement. By standing corrected I believe I take the power out of the dispute.

I also have a neurological disorder similar to MS which impairs my executive functions and memory. Thus placing things in time can be difficult for the recent past. If someone asks me on Friday if I did something earlier in the week I will probably not be able to tell them what day I did it on. In the afternoon I can’t remember if I did something that morning or if it was two days ago. I don’t know if this is from my neuro condition or my PTSD. As I learn more about my PTSD I am realizing that many things I attributed to the neuro condition are actually part of the whole PTSD thing. I see that as a good thing as it gives me hope that through a lot of work I can mitigate the destructive things inside me.

 

[Shaylee]

Anyone else this way?

Oh heavens to Betsy, yes… not just during therapy but all the time. I feel guilty like I some how lied instead of making a mistake, but I’m also perfectionist so mistakes are not OK. So I feel guilty for not being perfect. And if I don’t fix it by admitting to my guilt and what I’m guilty of then my whole life goes topsy-turvy over the smallest craziest things. So as I tell people, it is physically impossible for me not to admit my guilt… no matter how small or insignificant others may see it as. And most people think I’m crazy for feeling guilty over some of the things that I feel I have to come clean about.

 

[Muttly]

I am also like that. I have DID and also dyslexia/other neuro-divergent stuff that makes me lose track of time and scramble what I am saying. I also feel the compulsion to correct myself though. I once told a therapist my time from was "it just happened"; "recently"; and "a long time ago".