Crying At Work And Disclosing Mental Health Issues

[canucklady]

I usually am able to keep it together at least at work. It is busy time and I am in accounting, so deal with numbers/spreadsheets all day. There were some errors in formulas that impacting board reports. I owned up to the error right away and my manager was not impressed, although she was totally professional. I guess a part got triggered that I would be fired and I panicked. One of my fears is to be homeless

Anyway, after meeting which I kept my cool, I couldn't log into email account, so immediately I thought the worse, my account was disabled and I will be fired. I called my manager and broke down in tears. Totally unprofessional. Basically turned into a blabbering mess. To top it off I called her after work hours.

But now am embarassed to face her. I told her I have having health issues, so this last issue was last straw

Just mortified. Work was a safe haven, now don't even have that.

I am thinking it is maybe best to let manager know what is going on with panic attacks, however am conflicted if that would make things worse.

 

[arfie]

Seems to me that work can be an even safer haven if it is okay for your outside life leak in every so often. For sure, you have opened up new possibilities. A positive outcome is possible, too... Hope one happens to you.

Just breath...

 

[therisa]

@canucklady does your company have a policy about dealing with health issues, specifically mental health? If it does, you should start there, and work your way, to sharing, as much as, you feel comfortable. If not sure, you should contact your HR department, about the company's policy. You shouldn't have to suffer, in silence. Myself, if I felt comfortable with my manager, I would approach them, and feel them out, before sharing.

 

[Britt.f7]

Definitely talk to your HR. I would do that first. I was a babbling idiot in the last month I worked, due to health and mental illness. That situation didn't work out but that doesn't mean that people above my manager, HR, wasn't trying. I just wish I would have handled some things differently. Good luck.

 

[ill]

I'm almost positive that people with mental health issues are protected in Canada. I think any workplace and/or school is legally required to accommodate your diagnosed health issues, but I don't know if they have to be documented first (if your workplace doesn't know about them, they can't accommodate them). My recommendation would be to do a little bit of research and/or enlist some help with that part. Then I might want to contact HR (via email if possible so you have documentation) asking how they can help accommodate you. I'm not sure that you would have to reveal the kind of health issues you have, but some research in the right place might be able to help (maybe your local Canadian Mental Health Association can help?) and you might even be able to refer to just the stress of your health issues.

A personal suggestion I would add is to give yourself time and space when you're triggered. It's so very easy to respond immediately and impulsively to a trigger because the fear is so overwhelmingly big and we just want to get rid of it, but even taking a few moments can help. If you can, call a friend or access the board or a crisis line (the CMHA has those) so that you have someone to help you work through the trigger before you actually begin to tackle it. I don't mean to sound harsh at all, but this is something that I've only recently begun to do and it has helped so much. I have time to calm down, to gather myself together again and then I'm able to think and respond a little more clearly in my interactions.

Everybody has a bad day or week or month, and everyone makes mistakes. People sometimes cry at work. I know it feels terrible, but it's not the end of the world and it's likely weighing much, much more on your mind than your manager's. Apologize citing something like the stress of your health issues and then move on. You had two bad days and you feel awful, but it's really just two bad days and one mistake. How many great days have you had? How many more will you have? Those two moments aren't the sum of all your work. And these things can happen to anyone, PTSD or no, they probably just feel much bigger because of the PTSD.

 

[BloomInWinter]

In the US, more often than not, HR is not our friend.

It's ok to tell your boss you were simply stressed, which is true and happens to everyone. It just comes out in different ways. At least you didn't start flinging the computer all over.

Unless you have definitely, serious ongoing issues, it's ok to just chalk it up to stress and lack of rest and apologize for the outburst. If she's any kind of decent person, she will just be glad you're feeling better.

 

[RussH]

I really did not have much of a choice: I have, on three occasions, had an emotional flashback at work. Something would happen that would trip my trigger. The primary emotional response is grief. So having had these responses at work I decided that I needed to talk about what is going on with me. Fortunately, for me, we are keeping it in house, and this is not a discipline issue, it is they are going to be supportative and help issue.

I have shared with them what happened to me and the past, and it has helped them understand why I have had these strong emotional responses to seemingly minor events. They now know that the response they are seeing is to the original insult, and not what has happened in the present . Therefore for me, disclosing what is going on is a good thing.