Deep Damage Of Rape

[Abstract]

I actually think people just discussing how they personally feel about rape and death when they have experienced both is a legitimate thing Hashi. It isn't claiming that it is the case for everyone and is rather just a discussion of personal feelings. Everyone is different. For example for me personally I would rather die in an accident than a fire as a have particular feelings about fires and that would change the experience. Obviously I cant say without experiencing both and I would not assume it would be the case for everyone. Me saying that is not a dismissal of accidents.

I have seen similar things implied about death experiences but in much more blanket rather than personal tones with an implied dismissal of all else.

If it was, then I would have "chosen" to be raped.

it's more against nature than anything else

In fact you are expressing the exact same type of sentiment if you look at this differently. And in more blanket terms. But I can understand how upsetting or even triggering it could be to hear it when a death experience is so overwhelming for someone and am very sorry it brought up these difficult feelings for you. I don't believe anyone is dismissing death as a natural or any other experience.

Rightkindofme,
I suspect there is still an element of power involved when there is a lack of understanding signals regardless of how the full understanding affects the person later. And there is often a lot of other subtleties involved. Regret doesn't necessarily mean total innocence.

The exception is maybe children just re doing what was done to them without understanding.

 

[rightkindofme]

Well, I know that I raped people when I was a child. I *did* have power. I clearly didn't know it.

My point is that if you can say, "Well... maybe this class of people isn't doing it because of power..." then not all rape is about power.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

The first few times I was raped I was shocked. Deep unmoving shock. After awhile, I was becoming broken and I was starting to expect it to happen. Starting to think I deserved it. I 'made my bed and now have to lie in it' etc...

But the last few times before I got away, I started realizing it was rape. Nothing else. I couldn't deny it anymore and even in my head I started thinking 'Ok, now he is going to rape me.' I wasn't in denial anymore. I think that is when the worst psychological damage happened. I was aware of everything that was happening. I knew it was wrong and I felt like my brain was falling apart. The term 'going crazy' could be used here and I don't use it lightly.

It hurts and I think that is the hardest part of recovery for me. That breaking feeling is still difficult to feel even now.