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ED Disordered eating

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I do the same......diet.....fall off....stop weighing myself........gain weight....then restart.....and weigh daily......wish food wasn't such a struggle.

^Have you ever considered low carb/keto eating? Intermittent fasting?

If you're having blood sugar spikes all of these are now regarded as very beneficial for that and a) weight loss b) pre-diabetic - preventing progression to type II c) type II diabeties - returning to non-type II diabetic d) stablising type I diabeties d) metabolic syndrome. e) reflux & gastro issues.

I'm not trying to say this is what you should do. When one eats carbs then the craving for carbs is perpetuated. In fact carbs are quite addictive. Even simply doing the intermittent fasting may help. :)
 
^Have you ever considered low carb/keto eating? Intermittent fasting?

If you're having blood sugar spikes all of these are now regarded as very beneficial for that and a) weight loss b) pre-diabetic - preventing progression to type II c) type II diabeties - returning to non-type II diabetic d) stablising type I diabeties d) metabolic syndrome. e) reflux & gastro issues.

I'm not trying to say this is what you should do. When one eats carbs then the craving for carbs is perpetuated. In fact carbs are quite addictive. Even simply doing the intermittent fasting may help. :)
I was on keto 2 years and felt great. If I go off the cokes like cold turkey, my glucose dives.....and it can cause me to become seriously ill....really quick. So, I was doing okay, down to 2 cans of soda and drinking protein shakes and feeling good about progressing off the cokes....then surprise drama occured over 2 weeks....I have little drama now in my life...so.....my stress cup (I like that analogy) has to be low to do it and it was overflowing.....I was doing fine a couple weeks ago....had the diet plan all figured out...got on scale, the whole 9 yards.........was headed toward keto after slowly switching to protein shakes/milk sugar and from there was going to do keto and no milk sugar. Yeah.....someone brought drama to my house......and day before, the neighbor brought 30 bottled cokes to my house (found a sale-I didn't ask for them), starting over next week.....already told neighbor to stop the cokes and the person who brought the drama to my house....well, they didn't like my solution....but don't think that will happen again anytime soon. But keto is good.....I'm just taking a slower route to get there.
 
I'm a pretty competent disordered eating person, myself. Throughout my life I've fluctuated from severely restricting food and being way underweight, to the old binge eating/ overeating sidekick.
I find depending on what is going on in my life, it is better or worse. There are times when I have been able to get a handle on it for significant periods of time, only to have it come back with a vengeance.
The things I have found work best for me are absolutely no dieting and no restricting. Eating with a mindfulness I found helpful and an ability to listen to my body, what it needs and separate emotional eating from physical need to eat. I'm not always able to do this, that's why I also have to make the rule that if I fall off the wagon and binge on a bad day, it is okay. I think this is very important as the guilt of bingeing causes the cyclic nature of the problem.
I also once used a strategy of putting key positive thoughts that linked to my issues in my pantry and on/in my fridge. It kind of involved thinking about some key, underlying, past thoughts that might link to the eating. I ended up with signs like, 'I am worthy of a healthy body' etc. They really helped me when I was at that searching for foods stage. Key questions work well too, to remind me, 'Why am I eating?'
I once read a book, 'Good girls do swallow' recommended by an old T. It really changed my view on dieting, eating etc.
 
I had a really bad patch and mostly I managed it pretty well. I did a small amount of comfort eating. I was much more present and didn't numb out like I used to do.
 
I am still being mindful and aware of this and I am actually improving a bit more. I am reading David Burns' new book and it's really assisting me.
 
I did a small amount of comfort eating last night. I was so tired, almost asleep, but I kept getting up to get stuff to eat, but I only took one jatz biscuits and a little bit of tahini and honey. I am making progress. Having more of a purpose works better for me. I did one course yesterday and then realised I was snacking because I missed lunch, and then I did another few hours of another course, so I need to do some relapse prevention and also make sure to feed myself properly three times per day. More progress is being made. I am doing okay.
 
Doing so much better with this now. It's a big change. A few spoons of yogurt last night, such a big change over time. I have been studying TEAM-CBT and it's really opening my eyes to a few strengths that I have so of course I would have trouble letting some things go. I don't want to let go of my highest ethical values and core values. So I am learning so much.
 
Thank you for noticing me! It is really amazing @ninja - I am often so hard on myself I never give myself credit but now I am making progress and I am actually acknowledging that I am making progress. That is a huge step out of the pathological shame for me. I am not all bad, it's so liberating to have that pop into my consciousness every now and then.
 
Well this went down hill yesterday.

I am not longer going to focus on weight. I am changing myself a lot so I can do it. I just have to keep going. I will get there.
 
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