Do you ever feel like your lying about having ptsd?

[Abstract]

All the time too.

 

[Freida]

oh good grief yep!! All the flipping time. Even today as I was writing I was saying to myself "stop being a drama queen its not that bad".
I think it should be listed as one of the criteria for PTSD -- how far you will go to say you don't have it

 

[Abstract]

I eventually read up a lot about both denial and validation injuries. Some come through a lot of trauma without validation injuries. Often if they have had some experience of good enough parenting or if someone validated them while growing up and developing.Other times if they happen to respond by believing in themselves and ignoring the words of others. Validating parenting is not about agreeing with all emotions or actions but rather seeing the person and recognising and acknowledging that individuals emotions.

The other and huge one is about some part of our brain trying to deny the harm or experiences to protect us from the reality. To somehow take control rather than admit being affected. Or having different realities and thoughts battle between them. I know I dissociated a lot so breaking that down was threatening.

And lastly it can be messages planted into our brains by harmful others from the past, that we then continue to inflict on ourselves. That's the way I understand it.

Can't figure out what has caused what with me usually. It just has caused me to be at serious risk from myself and caused intense anguish and self attack (including physical). It has also stopped me from getting help in the way that I want or being able to speak when I do. The backlash has often been pretty scary and in fact I wondered if I would survive it.

 

[Sideways]

I feel like I cannot breathe and am gasping for air, yet here I am, sitting in a chair appearing calm and normal, breathing just fine.

Seems like your brain is maybe telling you that since something good has happened, then you should be fine now.

But, based on what you’ve described you’re not fine. Not by a long shot. Had a moment of fine maybe (awesome, take that as a win), but it hasn’t persisted like you moght have hoped. Or like your brain is telling you it should’ve.

Which makes sense, since a lot of us? Don’t go from suicidal to fine in a week. Takes time to pull out of that hole.

So, if your brain is telling you “You should be fine, so you must be exaggerating...” that’s a cognitive distortion. Should Statements send off an instant cognitive distortion alarm. ‘Should’ is an externalised standard you’re setting for yourself, it isn’t what is actually occurring for you, or even what is necessarily even possible. Suicidal to fine in a week? Pretty rare.

When your brain is telling you that you should be fine, it can often make it incredibly difficult to do any kind of realistic self-assessment about how we’re actually feeling, because the “should be fine” thing gets so overwhelming. That’s happened to me countless times.

If that resonates at all? Treat yourself like someone who was recently so depressed that they were suicidal. That person? Needs lots of support, gently engaging activity when they can, and loads of self-care and self-soothing. For some weeks to come. Because regardless of whether you should be fine, or whether you feel like you’re exaggerating - you know that a week ago you were considering suicide. That’s real. That’s enough to guide the level of care you need right now.

 

[Friday]

To be lying, Id have to be telling people. ;) Which I don’t.

So instead I just decide I’m FINE, dammit, on average of about twice a day :whistling:

 

[Abstract]

There is always lying to oneself. For those of us who don't tell others ;):)

 

[Stephernovas]

I think I am still trying to recover from the concussive stuff too. My mood changes so much that I feel I cannot keep track of how much it fluctuates. I know I'm far from where I was pre-trauma, but the idea that this may takes years to swallow is hard. The other day my therapist tried to get me to start talking about work. All I could do is shake my head 'no'. I found it triggering to even imagine what I COULD do for work. It's almost like the idea of doing anything else but surviving right now is upsetting. Blah.

 

[EveHarrington]

I exaggerate my scales because I know I minimize. Which means my answer is accurate! Lol.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I do not really talk about having PTSD to the friends that are normal unless it is on a need to know basis. I only talk about having it here and no I never feel as if I am lying.

When I first started therapy I used to tell everyone but that was a fatal mistake. Now I keep my PTSD pretty much to myself in my real life and just cope with my symptoms the best I can.

 

[Stephernovas]

I do not really talk about having PTSD to the friends that are normal unless it is on a need to know basis...

Why was that a mistake for you? I’m caught in an inbetween of telling people who I feel need to know (service providers) and people who are close to me. I think most assume given my trauma and that I’m still off work but I’ve only actually confirmed it to a few

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Why was that a mistake for you?

It was a mistake because at that time I was telling everyone I knew at the time, and not all of them were able to understand, the way I needed, and it caused me some problems as a result of it. I needed to be more cautious about which people I could trust with this information.

 

[Mach123]

Sometimes I want to tell people just to see the look on their faces. I would say if put in a corner and having to answer why or whats so wrong with you: "I'll tell you but if I do you'll never look at me the same way again and it might just change your ideas about everything and I'll probably never speak to you again. Do you want me to keep going?" I went through periods when I thought what happened to me was not that bad but after all the therapy and stuff I just know what CSA does. I also know some people go on and live some kind of normal life and I didn't. Oh well. Just lucky I guess. I had to tell someone yesterday but it was the opposite kind of thing she was asking me for help. I said yeah I was sexually abused and was on the point of tears like I almost always am when I say that. I was trying to help someone though so it was worth it. Otherwise its situational and I never mention it. I did not believe it for years at first I thought it was kind of a joke and I was getting away with murder. It's true though they know what they are talking about.