Every Day Is A Step Closer

[Deleted member 29920]

To my death. Sometimes I find that reassuring. Sorry. Tonight I just wish I hadn't been created. Sometimes I wish fear would disappear. Because it's one of the few things that stops me ending it. I'm getting a bit too tired. I'm tired of trying to remain positive. I'm tired of pretending I'm ok. I'm tired of being lonely. Thank goodness another day has gone.

 

[Gadgie]

Being lonely is really hard to cope with, I find having the radio or TV on makes it a bit easier! as it gives the impression that there is someone in the house.

I've given up on music, as every song in the collection that I play, reminds me of my wife, we both really liked music, especially "the oldies"

I'm going to try "talking books" at my sisters suggestion, to see if they can help me, as I'm not really much of a reader.

I get bad days, the same as you are having just now, I think we all do, it's just as well we are all here to support you at this time, good luck.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I am glad you are here and I empathize with how you feel. When ever in the past I felt sick and tired of being sick and tired this would motivate me to begin the changes in me that took care of me. Hang on. Many healing hugs and so sorry you are feeling like this today.

 

[Deleted member 29920]

Thanks @gizmo and @Gadgie, there are more bad days than good right now. Your messages helped me

 

[Ronin]

@Cj77, I'll ask this differently - what do you feel life without fear would be like?

And what of that 'then, one day, maybe', can you have in your life now?

 

[Deleted member 29920]

Life without fear would be amazing, my problem - I don't know how to have it. I did have a little realisation yesterday though and I am understanding the fear more. I just don't know if there is an actual solution for me. I want there to be...

Right now seems impossible..

 

[Ronin]

Cj, you're brave & strong getting through it every day. Start seeing that - the courage you put in every step, especially when so afraid. You're already tackling the fear. It just better pesters less, but you're not doing nothing.

 

[Deleted member 29920]

Thank you @Cashew, you're right, this is what I needed to hear so thank you :hug: :notworthy: