Gardening And Grounding

[JustBe]

Meadowsweet, I am the same way. I like my privacy. We have a community yard here so in the summer it is impossible, but this time of year all the summer people are gone and It is so peaceful.

 

[fairywings]

I hate gossipers. It is a way to be angry at people without having to take responsibility for it. I learned that in a anger management class.

I agree Gizmo. It would be different if they were actually trying to help. What a great post.

 

[LC23]

Yeah, eff the gossipers, just keep it easy, breezy, and light. Deflect prying directions, and if all else fails, "oh sorry, I really have to keep working, it's planting/weeding/harvest season!"

If that fails, good fences make good neighbors.

 

[maddog]

Gosh, I'm exactly the same about disliking neighbourly intrusion, even though I'm sure it's, for the most part, well intended. My home is my castle, and only those with a specific invitation are welcome across the drawbridge!!

If I was a gardener, which sadly I'm not really (managed to kill my 2 pots of tomatoes last year...), then I would be a back gardener only.

Maddog

 

[LC23]

If you want some really easy edible gardening: find a shady spot in your back yard and grow lettuces and a few herbs like rosemary, sage, oregano, and chives. They're much easier than tomatoes, require no special equipment, and you can grow them nearly year-round in a lot of places, all but the hottest and coldest parts of the year. Just needs soil + water + sunlight. You can even do it in containers, indoors or out, as long as there's daily sunlight (even consistent indrect sunlight is probably fine). Having fresh lettuce for salads and fresh herbs for flavor goes a long way. Plant some new lettuce seeds every 2-3 weeks if you want to keep it more consistent through a long part of the year.

 

[Hashi]

My biggest problem is that in the front garden people walk past and look at you, and I'm prepared when I leave my house, to face people. But when I'm on my own, at home, I'm in my own space and I feel threatened by strangers seeing that me.

I've just come in from the garden now, because the person over the road started speaking to me, asking about my life. I understand that she is being neighborly. But it scares the shit out of me. I hate it.:D

Although I understand where you're coming from, I have to slightly disagree with you. I think when I'm in my front garden I'm in a public space, or at least I'm directly connected to a public space. When people speak to me, I think they're trying to build community.

Perhaps my street is different from yours, but I'd guess that 90% of the people walking past when I'm in the front garden live within five streets of me or are visiting a relative who does. This is their neighbourhood, or the neighbourhood of someone they care about. Whether they were walking their dog, or going to the station, or on their way to a visit or whatever, they've decided to try to connect with me because I'm part of their neighbourhood, or because I'm part of their parents'/grown up children's neighbourhood. And I'm caring for it, by taking care of my front garden that everyone can see.

Working in my front garden has been the opportunity I needed to meet the people who live near me. Without that, I wouldn't know anyone to leave a set of keys with. I wouldn't have a way for my neighbours to come and talk to me about neighbourhood issues without making a big deal of it.

When the person living in the flat below me died, I deliberately spent an afternoon in the front garden so that my neighbours could talk to me about it. They might have felt it was too much to ring my bell, but they wanted to offer sympathy and support. Because I was outside they could stop and say they were sorry and ask if there was anything they could do.

I think gossips are poisonous and to be avoided. One of my neighbours is a gossip and I tell her as little as I can. I think that's a seperate issue, though. I think front-garden life is valuable in knowing who lives next door to you and - in my case - feeling safer that they're keeping half an eye out for me and my flat as a result.

 

[LC23]

I forgot to mention - leaf lettuce is the easiest for me because I just pick off whatever leaves I want for a sandwich or salad and let the rest grow.

 

[Springer80]

leaf lettuce is the easiest for me because I just pick off whatever leaves I want for a sandwich or salad and let the rest grow.

AND its a dopamine rich food would you believe it. Strange what the most ordinary of things can do. Maybe that's why bunnies are happy?

 

[Toria]

Ahhh - this is why we are trying very hard to move house. We've found a little bungalow with an old plant nursery out at the back. I think it would do Husband (Sufferer) the world of good and he's already planning what he wants to do with it.

 

[Philippa]

Meadowsweet, I'm wondering if perhaps the neighbour you speak of was asking questions as part of a community safety concern...to get to know who the neighbours are and make sure the street is safe.

There are gossipers, and certainly, every street has one...but isn't it possible that this person was simply trying to discern more about you for the purpose of making sure you were someone who posed no threat to her/him or the people in the street?

Maybe I didn't read your post well enough, but this was my first thought, so I figured I'd throw it into the mix.

Having said that though, gossipers are the worst, and if that was her motivation, then you have a reason to be paranoid.

I was walking home the other week, and had an interaction with an older Italian woman who was minding her two grandchildren in teh driveway, when I walked past. She started asking me all sorts of questions, and I also go ta bit annoyed at being interrogated so much, but later thought about it, and realised she was probably just making sure I was someone nice, as I am new to the neighbourhood, and there are a lot of people who take the concept of community seriously here where I live, so I don't think it's such a bad thing...but it can come across as quite interrogative, so I hear you there.

 

[Springer80]

I think its something that is missing. More people live on their own, the pace of things can be a little crazy. I think people miss it. I know I do. I used to weed my street and pick up litter and take post/deliveries and feed my neighbors cat etc. It was lovely. I felt part of a group and safe.

 

[Meadowsweet]

I don't believe the lady meant any harm, I live in a small town and people do talk about other townfolk.

It's not done maliciously, it's just the way it is here. But for someone who always feels like I have terrible secrets, and am no good at chit-chat, it's stressful.