Had A Therapy Session...feeling Like I Was Doing Better Before.

[Tinyflame]

Oh, haha, just thought, the best hairdresser I ever had- worldwide awards- had a Lamborghini that he was going to sell to my sister for a steal, & he only charged 35$ a cut! ('40$' with an increase. :roflmao: ). He himself didn't worry about appearances whatsoever though.

 

[Ronin]

Personally, I'm not that concerned about seeming (mine and others) because that's all super subjective and subject to change.

I'm concerned about whether the therapist & therapy they do can help me, or move me in some other direction where it doesn't help me, or not.

If it can't do even those two basic things (help me figure what's helpful, help me figure what's not and roll from there), then it's a waste of my time and money. Everything else? That's their business, not mine.

 

[Truthful_Whispers]

I have had lifelong experiences with therapists, but I can count on one hand how many were actually helpful. This is not to criticize all therapists, but many of my personal experiences with them weren't too great. Many seemed more interested in getting that hour or so over and collecting their money, than actually helping me. There are some good ones out there, I know. I hope others have better experiences, though.

 

[Truthful_Whispers]

LMAO... One of my favorite therapists of all time essentially drove an F-14 Tomcat! Actually he did...

F-14's are two seater aircraft. Did your therapist happen to have a backseater with the call sign of Goose? ha ;) :p (joke)

 

[Friday]

Lol @Whispering_Truth . I think if my therapist had been Tom Cruise I might have even more issues than I do now.

Technically he wasn't my therapist, however. I just borrowed him from time to time. ;) So who knows?

@Dana1010 Generally "I'm never afraid of quoting a bad author, if the line is good"... But there are definitely people I get on with better than others, and people whom I can hear what they're saying more clearly than others. If her appearance is too distracting for you to participate? Whether that's because she's polished, fat, skinny, stinky, sloppy, scarred, ugly, beautiful, short, tall... If she's too distracting for you? While that highlights another issue, maybe, it's also a legitimate concern.

 

[Chava]

Were you able to talk about the symptoms you experience (the triggers, and the convulsions)? I think it would be most helpful to find out if you trust her take on these issues, regardless of how she dresses. Is she in a clinic or setting where maybe she feels a certain need to look more professional? I think that's fine. I've had good therapists with all range of professional dress and tone. The ones who turned me off were simply more cold or CBT focused (my thoughts were the problem and there was some structured way to change myself, vs a more self-directed but supported process).

If she's better than the last two you consulted with, I think it's good to give it another session. But I think the goals and understanding her approach are most important...or at least that's what mattered to me in finally finding a therapist I could stick with. All the other little things, like how she dressed or what her office looked like mattered less (though, I do appreciate the space is not very formal and it felt okay for me to sit on the floor). You have to whittle down what matters most to you and what you are willing to accept or let slide.

 

[Dana1010]

While that highlights another issue, maybe, it's also a legitimate concern.

You're right about it highlighting another issue. I have a thing about corporate people, I guess - they rub me the wrong way. But it's not just her appearance, it's her whole demeanor and the way she speaks--she's too "professional." I need authenticity--no polish, no filters, no window dressing.

@Chava, I was able to touch on the convulsions (actually started convulsing in the chair towards the end). She doesn't know what it's all about anymore than than the others have known. She said I might need to see a neurologist, which made me think, "Wow, I'm really messed up."

The ones who turned me off were simply more cold or CBT focused

Funny you say that. Her main training is in CBT, though she also has training in psychoanalysis. She has quite good credentials, I just didn't feel a connection.

 

[Truthful_Whispers]

CBT has a history of frequently being non-effective for ptsd. Didn't work for me, personally.

 

[Dana1010]

CBT has a history of frequently being non-effective for ptsd.

Really? The CBT article on this site talks about a high success rate for PTSD patients if I remember correctly.

 

[Chava]

She said I might need to see a neurologist, which made me think, "Wow, I'm really messed up."

I know you tried SE and didn't like that practitioner's approach to SE, right? And there were no other SE options where you are at? Have you considered alternative avenues to working with that relaxation, like finding a trustworthy yoga teacher, massage therapist...anything like that if you can handle that stuff? Or like a trauma-informed yoga therapist. ?? I survive on chronic tension and it's normal to experience some jolts or shakiness when my body is actually feeling okay to let go a little bit (I notice this with some relaxation stuff that is actually working for me a little lately....I don't move from tightness and tension to soft and relaxed without some twitches and jolts).

Not saying this is how it is for you, or that it's not something worth taking to a neurologist. But if you suspect a connection to general tension or somatic trauma stuff, finding safe-ish ways to relax, and allow some of that might help release it. But I don't know how much control you have over where it goes or how to pull back if it's too much.

Have you ever tried muscle relaxants or alternative nerve meds like gabapentin? I do like gabapentin (I take it for pain but it has a mildly relaxing feeling and is helping me in many ways, but it's subtle, which for me is a good thing). With convulsive-type body responses to relaxation I wonder if that might be helpful. It's mildly relaxing for many people, but it is actually an anti-convulsant medication. It seems to generally settle some of the nerve over-reactivity in my body without just numbing or dulling my feelings, which is good. Just takes the nerves down a notch.

Anyway, not sure if there are alternatives to a more somatic approach that you could mix in with a talk therapist, if you can find one you feel like you can connect with.

 

[Chava]

Really? The CBT article on this site talks about a high success rate for PTSD patients if I remember correctly.

The research is usually full of holes....like CBT worked 30% better than nothing at all (so usually poor results, even when only compared to nothing). No good comparisons to other forms of trauma therapy. The actual trauma experts, like Bessel van der Kolk, don't give it much weight. We need to research more approaches. CBT is simply more widely-accessible and relatively easy to study. The more process-oriented approaches that would likely work better for complex trauma would simply be harder to study, but I hope they figure it out. It's just CBT everywhere. I have to travel too far to see my therapist, who does nothing like CBT. CBT stuff worked for some of my general anxiety...not the trauma stuff...especially ill-fitted for the early trauma.

After 9-11, researchers offered CBT therapy to those directly effected (Van der Kolk writes about this). Most didn't follow through or even take up the CBT offer, but found more help in things like yoga. In their own body-minds they knew they just wanted to feel okay in their bodies. CBT doesn't address that. It doesn't address the deregulation of the autonomic nervous system, which operates quite independently from our cognitions....why entirely bright, aware, thoughtful, and logical people still have nightmares about planes flying into buildings, or suffer from feeling trapped in response to trauma triggers even if they "know" on some level that they are okay...

 

[Truthful_Whispers]

Really? The CBT article on this site talks about a high success rate for PTSD patients if I remember co...

Actually, I had signed up for some therapy in my area recently. Even the intake person I talked to said they didn't have any available types of therapy that would be very beneficial for me, since I have ptsd, and that they mostly only offered only CBT. I hope I am mistaken, and it works for others, for their sake. But personally, it never did do squat for me.