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Relationship He broke up with me!

  • Post starter Post starter Deleted member 45360
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Deleted member 45360

He broke up with me. Not only that but he left me for another woman.
Im in shock to tell you the truth. 2 weeks ago he invited me over, cooked for me the most delicious romantic dinner followed with a very passionate intimate night, where he made it clear to me he wants to date me and Im the one. Blah blah blahhh.....
3 weeks goes by, we meet up for drinks again in his place, I ask him whats his vision for our future, if he has one? He looks at me with his big sad eyes and says NO, I met someone else during the holidays and is considering falling inlove with her. I was in shock. I didnt see this coming, specially after him beeing a big initiator and tryng to get closer with me. Telling me the opposite. It just didnt make sense. I started to cry and asked him, how could he be possibly in love with somebody else already. He said not yet, he still has to get over me, but is talking to the other woman, Who supposedly lives in a diff country. Could it be that he just wanted to break things up bc he was getting more emotionally attached and he needs an ocean between himself and his love usually. But then again he said he would still like to keep me in his life. I mean, a big time player or just push and pull?????.... Hes distanced many times and isolated, but never told me he has to get over me before. So Im sure he met someone else, but why tell me all this loving bullshit if he wasnt serious to begin with. He'd been acting really angry and frustarting lately as well, mad at his family, telling me he doest speak to them right now, even tho hes very close to them. I dont know, non of this makes sense. Could it be anniversary date approaching and hes getting rid of everyone in his life he loves or could it be that Im a complete idiot to trust a man with ptsd/tbi. Im f*cking confused.
 
I’m a little lost. In other threads you have posted for the past few months and even 6 days ago, you have described not being together. In January, you wrote that you let him go and...
I have to let him go. Seeing him hurts me so much. And today I finally am taking off my pink glasses. He's a mess and I can't have what I want with him.
Tons of pushing and pulling and flirting with other women has been going on for awhile. It doesn’t seem like this relationship has been a good fit for awhile. Perhaps he did you a favor by breaking it off on his end?
 
Yes its been a confusing year for me as well @- JUSTMEHERE, yes he has been in and out of my life. And sorry I dont post every time he goes, I have to let him go, or he comes back. That shouldnt be the main point in my current thread! YES I let him go, but he kept coming back, so yes I was there for him. He continued to want something with me, but kept distance. I never pushed him after doing so much research on ptsd/ tbi. I felt for him yes. Wanted to be there for him as a friend or a lover, whatever. As a good person, I was there for him when he wanted me, as a doormat probably. What can I say. I cant get him out of my head. I keep thinking of him and feeling for him. This is the only place I can vent on this topic and heal. Or at least I thought so, without getting judged about my previous confusing threads!!!! Thought its a safe place where likeminded people share their mess. So dont judge me for being pushed and pulled, for confusing prior posts or for confusing you, because Im confused myself. People here vent. I thought its ok. It doesnt matter, what I said in my previous postings. What matters is what I wrote on this posting and how I felt. If you are confused, dont read it and dont reply. Thank you to all others who get it and are here to support the supporters, not to judge our mess and old threads @ justmehere.!! Obviously I had to let him go, bc he was pushing and pulling and confusing me, but also put two and two together, he came back, as they always do. And us big hearted women go right back into their trap.
 
I’m a little lost. In other threads you have posted for the past few months and even 6 days ago, y...

You obviously have no idea what it is to be in a confusing push and pull ptsd/tbi relationships!!!! Nobody asked you to go around in my previous threads with a magnifying judging glass!!! Yes shit happens, they confuse you, you let him go, they come back bc you belive their shit lies. You would know if you were a woman. We do dumb shit like this. If you have nothing smart or supportive to say, dont reply!!!! Im here to seek support, not judgement by beeing confusing or confused myself!!!!
 
You obviously have no idea what it is to be in a confusing push and pull ptsd/tbi relationships!!!!...
Wow, that was rude. Asking for clarification isn't an attack, do keep that in mind. Being confused isn't the same as being doubtful.

Anything you post is posted, and people wanting to help to get the whole story can look for it if needed/wanted.

The way you keep emphasizing the "PTSD/TBI relationship" thing -- be careful if you're doing this in real life! It can come across threateningly.

Anyway: It's time to get out of this relationship, no matter who did what. It's not good for you, clearly. I am wondering if you're worried he's planning on hurting himself and that's what you meant by isolating/pushing away? If so, take him to a hospital, but don't stay. This isn't good for either of you -- and if you meant that he is pushing away just to feel safe/non-committed, then he isn't ready for a relationship yet anyway.

There is no understanding, and no trust. Especially after possibly looking for sex, or possibly being with anyone else while wanting to get over you. If he wants to get over you, then it's time for you to give him that chance -- because no one can live like that.

Good luck :)
 
No problem :) Good luck. I'm sorry you have to deal with such a confusing situation.

When I'm gettin...


I know. Im usually pretty rational. But I let my brain to lost its mind and gave my power away. Trust me Im working on getting myself back. Its like been attacked by a tornado and scattering back the pieces :)

I appreciate your support. I really needed it from someone.
 
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