Well, I got through the weekend and it all went so well.
A BIG BIG thank you to all for the support and ideas, you are all SO appreciated, I would not have got through this without you and kept you all in my heart during the evening feeling your support and encouragement - so I take this one as a success for us all and send you all great mushy hugs of appreciation.
I have been having a hard time getting my Fiance to be positive and supportive (poor guy – don’t blame him for his pessimism, he has been through the ringer with me) but when I told him about all of your ideas around getting through the evening, he was so impressed, he came up with a few of his own. He bought a heart-rate monitor, I wore the receptor under my ball gown and he wore the watch so that he could keep a check on me all night. He could quickly see if I was coping or not by looking at the monitor and this gave him the control he needed to avert a potential situation i.e. me bolting due to an out of control panic attack. I love him so much for his courage and perseverance with me.
I also packed a rescue kit with a book to read, a bottle of water, herbal calming remedy, i-pod, blanket and some favorite crystals which I use for grounding – these all remained in the car in case I needed an escape, however, no escape needed! The belly dancer did not arrive and the only thing there to trigger me was a wall monitor with triggering images at the bar, so I avoided the bar and my man played the gentleman and got me my drinks instead.
It was a wonderfully elegant evening (oysters and caviar – first time for everything) and I had plenty of attention from my man who told me he was proud to have me on his arm (melt…melt). I was so pleased to be there too, I could be the support I wanted to be for him and actually enjoyed it greatly (who would have thought). We snuck out just after midnight and found a little place on the promenade selling toasted sandwiches and iced cappuccinos, where we sat in a contented haze and filled our bellies (caviar just does not do it for me) .
So thanks to you all for the good wishes and clever ideas, without your encouragement, I would have missed out on a wonderful experience. I am feeling more confident now and when the next event comes along I will not hesitate to get out my party shoes. I'll see if I can get my hands on a photo of us, with all the rush and apprehension on the evening, just didn't think to take one myself and love the idea of putting it up as a reminder of such a successful experience, thanks for the idea Amethist - oh yes, and red delicates worked great - another Amethist tip. :wink:
I am just filled with so much gratitude to you all - all the wonderful people on this forum fill me with hope, I hope I can be there for all of you too one day.
:Hug_emoticon:
