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How Am I Supposed to Deal with the Guilt?

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While I can in no way imagine the pain or guilt you must feel, I do think I can point out something you have not thought of yet.

While you were unable to keep that person from possibly hurting another child, there is a good chance that someone else WAS!

See, you still see this person out and about hurting children. That may not be true anymore. Let your minds' eye picture that person behind bars. Chances are that is exactly where that person is.

Picture yourself visiting that person in jail and handing that person a box. Then turn and walk away. The contents of the box? Guilt! It belongs to him NOT YOU so give it back to him
 
The police never walked more than a couple of steps into my room. It was very messy and one of the cops just kept complaining that there was not enough light in the room and asking whether my room was always messy.

I'm angry with the police as well. About ten years after it happened, my parents finally told me what the police told them about the man. He had a history of stalking girls with long, blonde hair, breaking in and stealing their panties and cutting their hair. I would really love to know why he was still walking free if they knew this. They took my case a little more seriously, because I was the first one he assaulted. I really felt like an ass for thinking for so long that he brought the scissors to kill me.

He has never been charged with another case involving children as best as I can tell. Like I said before, pedophiles don't just stop being pedophiles. He stills lives in the same town and I check his arrest record from time to time. He is in and out of jail, but mostly for drug charges. I want to contact him and let him know that I still remember what happened. After considering his stalking record, I have decided against this more for my own daughter's safety than my own. She also has blonde hair.
 
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