How Does Hyper Vigilance Effect You?

[Blondie362]

This post struck a chord with me, my world is about assessing the fear of threat to my personal safety, it does get exhausting especially at night, when I can't switch my brain off, listening to noises... checking windows and door locks etc.. BUT I am also aware I have a capacity to gauge a situation or person very quickly, by body language or the general atmosphere in a place.

For example, I went to a local pharmacy a couple of years ago with my sister and i noticed a guy who was acting very agitated, she couldn't read it, and I said we need to get out of the shop or get to the back fire exit door, she thought I was "over reacting"...and to calm down and carrying on shopping....

I could just tell by this guy's behaviour he was about to blow, and also he was carrying a weapon?? of some sort he was fumbling in his coat.... she went along with me, and within 5 minutes of getting to the back of the store, he pulled a gun and fired it into the glass cabinets.. the front doors locked and we had only one escape route- the fire exit..

Cut a long story short because I couldn't run fast due to a leg injury & she dragged me out through the fire exit and we helped others get out too

Once out she burst into tears and kept saying "what if I couldn't have got you out"? and all the scenario's started to play in her head about the" what ifs.... I said " welcome to my world, thats how I feel every day"- when I feel threatened she always says " yes but it hasn't happened has it?" .... drives me crazy but PTSD sufferers in my opinion due to experiences in the past have the ability to judge a situation very quickly ...but it can be hugely disabling & exhausting condition- but one we seem to have built into us instinctively.

 

[Kris1984]

It is exhausting and probably the most aggravating symptom to me.

 

[Lucille]

Blondie, I'm so glad you got out of that situation alright! I can imagine that was very difficult for you :(

 

[Blondie362]

Thank you Lucille, I was pretty glad we got out too:)

 

[Deimos]

Wow Blondie that's one heck of an example of vigilance actually being beneficial. I'm glad it worked out for the best. I have had a few times like that but never to that magnitude. Most times I can anticipate fights well before aggression is really noticeable. Most of the time however, its all in vain. I check locks and double check them. I'm always watching the shadows sometimes so much that my mind plays tricks on me. I found that I had it under control for the most part but when therapy gets intense so does my symptoms. It definatly gets tiresome at times.

 

[Mea]

This is a older posting, but I still wanted to respond.

I can relate to Meadowsweet and Lucille completely. I constantly scan peoples faces, their expressions, eyes, tone of voice, and body language. I also remember what has been said in the last conversation and then I piece it together. I look for hidden meanings and messages, or if the person is being sarcastic and making fun of me. I am also always on the look out of someone trying to screw me over.

When I get into situations where I feel threatened I freeze and it feels like my pupils are fixated and I cant speak. I feel like a robot. I have a hard time describing what it feels like.

It is exhausting! I always have a higher blood pressure when they measure my blood pressure. My back, neck, lower back hurts all the time.

 

[untiltoday]

I constantly scan peoples faces, their expressions, eyes, tone of voice, and body language. I also remember what has been said in the last conversation and then I piece it together. I look for hidden meanings and messages, or if the person is being sarcastic and making fun of me. I am also always on the look out of someone trying to screw me over.

Always. I also find myself pre-preparing for any interaction with people, planning for the reactions/answers I might get, and picturing how I might escape or react.

 

[franciemarnie]

I identify with everyone. Hypervigilance is a constant drain of energy.

I also have very little hearing so when I go out (so rare) - like today I went shopping at Macy's - I feel I have to "see" what I can't hear. That heightens my vigilance unbearably.

It's been this way for decades. I self medicated with painkillers for years, which for a while was the most wonderful blanket of calm and relaxation that I hadn't been able to access since I was a baby.

You know what happened down the line. Addiction. I quit 12 years ago. If there was no such thing as tolerance, I might still be on them.

The only thing I have found that restores me is mindful meditation with a scan of the body. It is for me so much easier than the focus-on-the-breath type. I'm used to constant assessment of every little thing so it is interesting and kind of fun to feel and assess my inside and its near constant change of sensation. It also revives me from the inevitable hypervigilance fatigue. I even feel close to relaxed sometimes afterwards.

For me - hypervigilance is the worst of the symptoms. With it comes little or no quality sleep and everything suffers from that.

 

[Mick Schultz]

Hi there I am 28yr old male from Oz, I have just come across Hypervigilance today, as i was reading it for the first time I could hardly believe what i was reading. What? There's actually a reason, I'm some nut job. I have struggled with alcohol and drug dependance for the last 10 years, It has only been recently that i have realised somethings kinda not right. Currently i am addicted to Ice (Meth) On average I'll stay awake for 4 days, hardly drink, never eat, See i devolped Anorexia when i was 14, and still struggle with that every day, see the Ice keeps my weight down, and that just adds to my reasons for using. But lately when i've been around the people i have been hanging around with, always heavilly drug affected, my mind has just been literally running away from me, extremely fast, I'm always constantly looking wherever i am, with whoever i am, as i am talking, i'll be paying more attention to what other people are saying, other conversations, waiting to believe I'm in serious trouble, I'll ask everyone what's going on, what have i done, said, thought? Anything!! It's just completely outta' control, it has come to the point today where I will be staying away from people, maybe not leave my room, or step outside. If i hear a noise, I jump through the roof instantly, I'm on edge, totally and completely on edge. Hypervigilance to me, has no positives, it's all completely negative. This is not good, but hey, I guess I'm not the only one, and that makes me feel a little better.
I can't explain this without mentioning that i was adopted at birth, and have never had contact with my birth mother. This is an extremely painful topic for me to talk about, i guess hence all my drug and alcohol issues, eating disorders, OCD. Hypervigilance is really starting to affect me in a bad way, and it doesn't just affect me, it ends up affecting the people and situations i am with/in very negatively.